


so we don't drown in the ocean

by acastle



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Age Difference, Alternate Universe - Lawyers, Car Sex, Depression, Homophobia, Homophobic Language, Infidelity, M/M, Minor Kim Minseok | Xiumin/Original Female Character, Office Sex, Rough Sex, Semi-Public Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-09
Updated: 2019-07-26
Packaged: 2020-01-07 08:28:12
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 49,901
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18406880
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/acastle/pseuds/acastle
Summary: Sehun looks at him, considering. “It would do you good, to release your anger somehow. Not keep it so bottled up.”“And how would you suggest that I do that?” he stares at Sehun.He sits up a little straighter, and his eyes glint. He’s not quite smiling, but there’s a ghost of it gracing his lips.“With me.”(Minseok is going through a divorce after he found out his ex wife has another man. One day he meets the son of his ex wife's new husband.)





	1. 1; don't know when it bloomed

**Author's Note:**

> prompt 33. I hope you like this, prompter. thank you for the inspiration.
> 
> thank you to the mods for being so patient and kind with their critique. this fest was a joy to write for. I'm sorry for being so late. please await the second part.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> part 1

It started first with the text messages.

Minseok never really minded before. He understood that they had to have their own boundaries and privacy, and the phone was chief of it. But, when she had started purposely hiding her phone from him, texting secretly and making private calls away from him, he had begun to get suspicious.

He didn’t think she would cheat on him. Not until he saw the texts when she had carelessly left her phone on the dresser while she had been in the bathroom and he had seen it. The string of texts popping up on her phone’s screen, from a contact labelled simply with a black heart. And they were romantic words, sweet and affectionate and Minseok. Minseok was crushed, as he saw them come, as he tried to ignore them for her sake, but he knew the nature of the words weren’t just friendly.

He didn’t confront her then. But, he supposes he should have, because when he comes home a little early around a week later, wanting to surprise her on their anniversary, he finds her and his boss, on their bed, in a position that makes it all clear to Minseok what a fool he’d been this whole time.

“Min, wait,” she tries, following him out the room, wrapped in a blanket, and Minseok didn’t look back. Last thing he had seen was the look on his boss’s face, a middle-aged man, tall and strong jawline and a smirk that was always on his face, a permanent sign of his power.

Before, Minseok had always had respect for it, as it had been the thing that had hired him, the same look that he had aspired to have one day.

Now, he wanted nothing more than to wipe it right out of his face, by any means necessary.

“I’ll be back tomorrow to get my things,” he says, trying not to sound as devastated as he really felt, grabbing his keys and wallet and coat, not looking back.

“Minseok, please, wait-”

“I gave you over a _decade,_ Soeun,” he said, turning back to face her. He keeps his face cold, hard, but he was more than shattered. “College, and after. Where, _fuck,_ what did I miss? Where wasn’t I enough?”

She looks at him, her eyes wide, and she is beautiful. Still the most beautiful girl, and Minseok _loves_ her so much, and his whole world feels like it’s just vanished, right beneath his feet.

“I don’t have anything to say to you,” he says, and he leaves, right out of the apartment _he_ paid for, for both of them.

It’s when he’s inside his car, keys in his hand, unable to start his car, that he cries.

.

“Join us for breakfast, Minseok.”

“No, I’m okay.”

He doesn’t see the looks Junmyeon and Yixing give each other, but he does hear the soft, _“Talk to him, baby,”_ Yixing says to Junmyeon. The soft kiss he presses to the corner of Junmyeon’s mouth, before leaving, Junmyeon left standing against the doorframe.

Junmyeon had been the first he’d called. Something of a brother by everything except blood, since they were kids living a few houses apart, attending the same schools up until their graduate studies. Junmyeon and his fiance were so _kind_ to him, taking him in and giving him a room until he could pick himself up, and he owes them so much.

If only he could somehow be less devastated, less furious with himself. His boss, his wife.

“Min,” Junmyeon says slowly, coming in and sitting carefully at the edge of the bed Minseok refused to get himself out of. “It’s been a few days, you haven’t really eaten anything.”

“Not hungry,” he says in turn, picking at the cuffs of the too-large sweater that exposes his shoulder and with sleeves that hang well past his fingers he has on. Has had on for a few days too many, a little thing he’d always made himself cling on in times less happy. He hadn’t used it much for the last few years, but. He seems to be maximizing the use, now.

Junmyeon frowns, obviously not liking the answer.

“I. I can’t possibly know what you’re going through, and I hate it,” Junmyeon says to him, reaches out to hold his hand. He squeezes his fingers in turn, but he closes his eyes, willing himself not to cry. No more. “But, I want to help, and. I need to know what you want to do, moving forward.”

 _Moving forward._ Such an abstract thing, at its core. He doesn’t even know what it means. Doesn’t know what he wants, coming out of this.

“I don’t know what to do,” he says, feeling hopeless and pathetic for it.

“Do you want to stay with her?” Junmyeon asks him carefully.

Minseok had thought about it, over the past few days. Ad it been when he had first found out about the texts, the messages and secret calls, many months ago, maybe, yes. Yes, he would want to stay, try to work through this.

But. Now, after seeing her, on the bed they shared. Intimate with a man he respected. He can’t stomach the thought of going back to her.

He couldn’t. Couldn’t do that to himself.

“I can’t,” he says. Feels like he’s killing a bit of his heart as he says it.

“Then we start from there,” Junmyeon says. Pauses, and says even more cautiously, “Maybe. Maybe ask Jongdae? To represent you?”

“I can’t ask him, we’re a corporate law firm. He doesn’t handle divorces. And, it will make work awkward,” he says, chest aching. “I don’t want too many people at work to know. The scandal this will cause-”

“Really, Min?” Junmyeon sighs, moving a little closer, and even though Minseok is older, it has always felt, to some degree, that Junmyeon had been taking care of him for most of their lives. He just seemed to know more. _“You’re_ the one who got cheated on. If anyone should be concerned about scandal, it’s them.”

“I know. But,” Minseok pauses. Feels a little helpless when he says quietly, “I’m not ready to answer questions. Or. Face it. I know I should, and I will. But I’d like the room to be a little devastated. Just for now.”

Junmyeon looks at him, so patient, understanding. He pulls Minseok into his arms, hugs him tightly.

“Take your time,” he says, “you’ll always have a place here. Even though I hate the Depression Sweater.”

“It’s comfy and warm.”

“It has holes in the armpits and has a bacon collar, it’s a travesty.”

“Suffer.”

“Perish, then.”

Minseok smiles. It’s small, but genuine, truly very thankful for the soft laughter and lightness Junmyeon tries to give him. He’ll always be thankful.

“I’m sorry for being a burden,” he says, because even though it’s the thing he wants to say most, he doesn’t know how to say thank you, at the moment.

“Stop,” Junmyeon tells him. “Stop. Being sad doesn’t make you a burden. You’ll be okay.”

Minseok breathes in. Hides his wet eyes, and breathes again.

“I hope I will be.”

.

He didn’t think he had the strength to make himself take off the Depression Sweater and go to work, but he is. Currently ignoring the stares and whispers that seem to follow him everywhere, gossip that can’t be ignored despite how relatively high up the chain he is here.

Being a top, high-earning partner that handles many of the most important cases doesn’t change much at all. The whispers still follow.

“Morning, Chanyeol. My office please,” he greets quietly, nodding as he opens the door to his room.

“Yes, sir,” Chanyeol stands from his desk stationed outside, closing the door as Minseok sets his things down and settles into his chair.

“What do I have for today?” he asks.

“Well, um. You have a few meetings with some clients. The shipping company merger, and that hotel CEO lawsuit thing-“

“Right, yes,” he says, preparing the necessary documents, reviewing the requirements and notes. “And in the afternoon?”

“Um,” Chanyeol says, blinking rapidly as he reads through the schedule displayed on his tablet. “Uh. Nothing _really_ so important that maybe you can’t skip out-“

“Park.”

“-Aside from a few meetings with the other partners, and. Um.”

“Chanyeol.”

“And you have that super important meeting with the board and other partners and you know, it’s like, _whatever,”_ he says in a rush, brushing over the fact that Minseok would be forced to see the man his wife had been having an affair with and will likely have to endure his presence for an indeterminate amount of time today, saying then to distract him somewhat, “But like _that’s_ important! How was your weekend, Minnie?”

“Cut the shit, I know you’ve heard,” Minseok sighs, and he sees Chanyeol flinch slightly. “I’m sorry, Yeollie. I didn’t mean-“

“I understand, Min. Don’t beat yourself up over it,” Chanyeol says, and more than being Minseok’s personal secretary, he’s a valued friend. One who’d been with him since he entered the firm, and didn’t leave even when he had taken other opportunities elsewhere on the side.

His early morning and after lunch mumbled mini-songwriting sessions using his desk and pen aside, he was too kind for his own good, kept Minseok’s heart light when he needed it, though he often tested the line between boss and employee, blurred to hell.

“I’m still sorry,” he says. “It’s not an excuse to treat you poorly. You’re not the one who cheated on me.”

“Shall I drop a bit of rat poison in Mr. Oh’s coffee?” Chanyeol says. Minseok knows he’s only half-joking. He appreciates the sentiment greatly, but he’s not quite violent and he doesn’t want anyone killed. Not really, he thinks. And Chanyeol is too kind to even think of accidentally poisoning anyone. He wouldn’t survive prison.

“No, he’s not worth jail time,” he says.

“And your wife isn’t?”

Minseok pauses at the question. His chest aches, and he hears Chanyeol shuffling a bit in his feet, knowing he’s touched a nerve, guilty.

He doesn’t want him to be, though, and he says, “I love her. But some things can’t be undone and sometimes, you just want for things to be over. Even if it would be more painful.”

Chanyeol gives him a sympathetic look. No pity or curiosity but all kindness, and he says, “I’ll get you your flat white-“

“Make it a double shot of espresso today,” Minseok says, sighing. “I think I’m going to need it.”

Chanyeol nods, bowing a little. Then he comes forward, blurring the lines again, dropping a small kiss in the top of Minseok’s head. “If you need anything, Min. I’m here for you. I mean, it’s my job, technically, but. For all the other stuff too.”

“Thank you, Yeollie,” he says, smiling. A little tightly, but still. “It means a lot.”

“Should I, maybe. If you wanted, go call Jongdae? Or Baekhyun?” he asks carefully, and Minseok thinks, considering.

“I think. I will speak to them instead, when I have that meeting with them,” he says, and he’s so _tired._ “Thank you, Chanyeol, that’s all for now.”

“Okay,” he says, another little smile, and he bows, leaving the room.

Minseok sighs again, been sighing _a lot,_ and he makes himself get to work, not be so useless.

The rest of the morning goes quickly. He works, meets with the clients, does well. He works hard enough that he forgets to have lunch, and it’s the first thing Jongdae notices when they meet up in the conference room for their briefing before meeting the board, saying straightforwardly, “Hyung, you look like you haven’t had anything but coffee for at least a few days.”

“That’s oddly specific,” Baekhyun says, but he turns takes a look at him, and he says, “Oh. But it’s oddly accurate, too.”

“I may have forgotten to eat,” he says, but. He’s not hungry. Hasn’t been very hungry for many days. “It’s not important.”

“That’s. That’s not healthy, Min,” Jongdae says, and Baekhyun looks at him, stares, really.

“I’ve been feeling generally awful the past few days, so. Maybe that’s why,” he says. “Or. Maybe it’s the fact that my wife has been fucking our boss for the past few months, maybe even longer, and I was too much a fool for her to confront her about it before this happened. Maybe it’s both. I don’t know.”

Baekhyun embraces him, pulling him close and saying nothing, a rarity.

He sighs again. Feels a bit like crying, but he doesn’t, leaning against Baekhyun, and a hand rubs his back, most likely Jongdae.

“Min. We’re sorry,” he says gently.

“I _loved her,”_ he says, and he’s so quiet. Everything aches. “I’m. I’m sorry, I know we should be working-”

Baekhyun shakes him a little in his arms, then hugs him tighter.

“Stop pushing yourself, hyung,” he says, voice gentle. “If you push and push. You’ll bleed yourself out.”

“Any of us will represent you, you know. If it comes to that,” Jongdae says, and Minseok looks up a little from where he had been hiding his face in Baekhyun’s neck. Jongdae gives him him a little look, admits, “Junmyeon called. Asked us to look after you. Please don’t be mad.”

“I’m not,” he says, “And Family Law isn’t either of your strong suits, so please don’t be so bothered with this. It’s. It’s nice, that someone is looking out for me. I’m lucky. But it’s hard.” He breathes, and he says shakily, honestly, “I’m so sad. I don’t know how I’m going to look at her, at him, from now on.”

“One thing at a time,” they tell him. “Tell us what you want to do.”

He doesn’t know then.

It takes a few hours for things to become a little more clear. The board meeting takes place in the biggest conference area and there are almost twenty people in the room. Minseok sits quietly between Jongdae and Baekhyun, Chanyeol standing behind him with the other secretaries, the board across them and discussing plans and twenty minutes into the meeting, he walks in.

“Sorry, I had a prior engagement,” Mr. Oh walks in, grin wide and there’s an air about him, and Minseok doesn’t look up, just stands with everyone else and bows, ignoring the looks everyone is giving him, between them. He looks up to see the look he’s directing at him, however. Smug, insufferable, and it might not be obvious to the other people of the room, but Minseok can recognize Soeun’s favorite lipstick color anywhere, a soft beige color that he had bought for her many years ago, one she stayed with and kept buying, smeared across his mouth, haphazardly wiped away. As if he wanted Minseok to see it on him, how he _had_ her, the way Minseok no longer does. “Well. _Engagement.”_

“He needs to shut up,” Baekhyun says under his breath. Chanyeol and Minseok kick his chair. “Min, come on, he’s-“

“Trying to get a rise out of me. And I won’t bite,” he says. “I won’t give him the satisfaction.”

“Min,” Jongdae says then, “He’s literally disrespecting you.”

“He’s still my boss,” he says. He feels especially hollow saying it.

“Minseok!” he winces, not looking up. Mr. Oh’s smirk is too tempting to punch right off his face. “How are you? Hope you weren’t too inconvenienced, the past few days.”

Minseok breathes. Keeps himself calm, bites just a bit, says, “I hope my apartment was to your liking, sir.”

“Gentlemen, please,” one of the directors say, just as Mr. Oh’s smirk turns into a full blown sneer, and his eyes narrow. “This is highly unprofessional.”

“I’m sorry,” Minseok says immediately, embarrassed.

“Of course,” Mr. Oh says, smiling at everyone. Looking powerful, and. He is, higher than everyone in the room, the firm literally named after him, and despite the board, no one can say no, and Minseok is wishing he had said yes to Chanyeol’s offer of dropping rat poison in his coffee. “I’m sorry. Kim here must be still reeling from the disintegration of his marriage. Forgive his outbursts.”

Minseok’s blood begins to heat up. Simmering, not quite a boil, but everything he’d suppressed himself to feel from the past few days. Everything the sadness and heartache made him forget, was beginning to come up to the surface, and his hands balled up into fists under the table, clawing at the materials of his suit pants.

“If anyone is having outbursts, it’s you.”

Everyone looks to the source of the new voice, and.

Minseok is more than surprised to see Mr. Oh’s son, the son who repeatedly caused his father grief by refusing to go to law school, refusing to take over the business and pursuing dance and being very good at it (though Mr. Oh wouldn’t know, as he’d refused every invitation his son would grudgingly extend to him to watch his recitals, shows, musicals), who often visited the office to make him upset, and.

A few times, when Minseok had just began to work for the firm a few years ago, he would pointedly hang around Minseok’s area. Grin, smile, flirt extensively, until Minseok had told him he was married. He had respectfully backed off then, but Sehun had remained kind to him, and they’re something more than acquaintances, less than friends.

“What’s he doing here?” Jongdae says, watching as Mr. Oh’s face turn red and his son’s smile widen, turn a little mischievous.

“Probably to cause more trouble, you know him,” Baekhyun says. Minseok stays quiet. “He’ll take any opportunity to humiliate his father.”

“This really isn’t the time,” Chanyeol says, the room going uncomfortably silent, watching them reluctantly.

“Sehun,” Mr. Oh glares at his son. Straightens up, and makes to move towards him, lead him out the room, “You’re not supposed to be here, this is a board meeting-”

“You’re not supposed to sleep with other people’s spouses, but I guess we’re both troublemakers, aren’t we?” he says, smiling, and Minseok closes his eyes. Tries not to be here.

“Sehun!”

“Yes, dad?” he beams, and Minseok feels Chanyeol set a hand on his shoulder, trying to comfort him, keep him anchored. “You aware that Mrs. Kim is just a few years older than me? Wouldn’t it be wiser to adopt her instead-”

“Enough,” Minseok stands, glaring hard at both of them. He doesn’t know Sehun very well, but he knows enough to see that he’s trying to defend him. But the method is leaving much to be desired.

He sees Sehun back down immediately, looking to him, and his gaze softens. The rest of the room is quiet.

“Hmm, finally standing up for yourself?”

“Do you always think with your dick, dad?” Sehun snipes, and Minseok breathes. Is almost to his breaking point.

“It’s clear that this isn’t going to go anywhere,” Jungsoo is sighing, the oldest of the board, the one everyone respects most. Minseok’s face won’t stop burning, in humiliation, in anger at everything happening to him. “Your emotional states aren’t going to let you think clearly. Let’s do this another time.”

“Please don’t be so bothered. It’s a simple, childish family matter,” Mr. Oh says, trying to be charming, sly.

“Well, you’re certainly acting childish,” Jungsoo says, staring straight at him. Mr. Oh looks taken aback. “Some of us are concerned that this scandal. Your behavior, is reflective of the firm. But as I said, it’s better if we discuss this another time. Does everyone agree?”

Everyone nods, or says their assent aloud, and Minseok is leaving the room right after, Chanyeol hot on his heels.

“Min-”

“I need a drink,” he breathes. He’s sad, and he’s been sad for the past few days. But now, he’s _angry_ too. So full of a rage he’s trying to contain and he tries, _tries_ to calm down.

“It’s four in the afternoon-”

“And my wife’s paramour and his son just made light of my situation to spite me and each other and humiliated me in front of everyone I respect and I think I am entitled to at least a glass of very good whiskey, just this once,” he breathes, and his eyes are burning with tears that are too hot, and he begs Chanyeol through his gaze.

Chanyeol cries instead for him, too kind, too pure. He’s a better secretary than Minseok deserves, says, “Okay, Minnie.”

“And. Before you leave, please call Jongdae or Baekhyun or whoever,” he says, “Maybe both of them. I, I can’t do this anymore. If this is what it’s going to be like.”

He does it for him. And Baekhyun and Jongdae come, and offer him the names of several reputable divorce lawyers, and when he cries, the realities of everything crashing down, they stay with him, all three of them.

.

“How was your meeting with Kyungsoo?” Chanyeol asks him gently the next day, after he’d come in to work and Chanyeol had set his coffee on his desk.

Minseok sighs, tired. He’s always tired, these days. Just a push and he feels like he’d blow away with the wind, or shake with the earth. “He was quiet, as always. Kind, sympathetic, like he was in law school.”

“So, he agreed to be your attorney?”

“He did,” he says. His hands are shaking just the slightest bit.

“That’s good,” Chanyeol says, “One thing at a time, Minnie.”

“Yes, I suppose so,” he says. Tries to be a little lighter, but things have been weighing down on him, one thing after the other. “What do I have to do today?”

“Just some case files for you to review,” Chanyeol hands him a pile of dossiers, and he stares at them. He hates paperwork. “No client meetings today. But, uh.”

“Hmm?”

“Someone called in to meet with you, and. Well-”

“Who is it?”

“It’s Sehun,” Chanyeol says, blinking, shrinking a little behind his clipboard and his coat’s too long sleeves.

Minseok blinks a well, and asks slowly, “What time did he ask to meet me?”

“Um, well. Now,” Chanyeol answers, glancing back behind them, and Minseok follows his line of sight. And he doesn’t know how he must have missed him, tall and dressed in expensive clothing head to toe, sitting on the waiting area’s couch with his long legs stretched out, waiting. Minseok suddenly gets even more tired. “And, well. He also said if you’re not available now, he’d be willing to wait. All day. Or. Or something.”  
“I wasn’t going to say no,” he says, sighing. “Let him in.”

Chanyeol blinks, but bows, doing as he’s told.

Minseok may have been so in love with his wife, so sure of their bond and stability that he may not have been tempted by Sehun before when he had outrightly flirted with him, but he has never denied that Sehun was _beautiful._ Sharp jaw and honest eyes that were charming but quiet, soft, and a smile that Minseok liked seeing on his face. Handsome and broad shouldered and gorgeous, and now that he was most decidedly not with Soeun, it was all the more apparent, how truly beautiful Sehun was.

Except. He had been very involved with one of the worst moments in Minseok’s professional career in the middle of a very painful breakup. So Minseok might resent his face a little currently, even though he does, at least, look genuinely sorry.

“Hi Minseok,” he says, and tall as he is, he looks quite small in front of him, his apology already lining the shape of his face, the set of his shoulders.

“Sehun,” he says, sighing again. Always sighing. “What is it that you need?”

“I owe you an apology,” he says. “A big one.”

Minseok looks at him, and he takes a moment. Then, “Please, sit.”

Sehun does, and Minseok waits. “Explain, then.”

He goes right into it. “I don’t have any excuses to give you. Just, I had caught them. Right before he left for that meeting, he and. Your-“

“So you’re saying you saw Soeun and your father together?” Minseok asks him.

Sehun takes a small breath. “They’re weren’t being very subtle. Or, at least he wasn’t.”

It’s not easy to hear, but Minseok gestures for him to continue, and he does. “And, I know him. I knew he would make a scene and try to make you look weak or embarrass you and. I ended up doing that to you,” he says. He shrinks a little further. “I’m sorry. So sorry. I never should have made a scene.”

“I understand you have your issues with your father,” he says, trying to word himself carefully. “You have your anger towards him, and that’s yours. I won’t say anything about that. But, to take advantage of _my_ situation. My failed marriage and my wife’s infidelity with him. It was uncalled for, and in the poorest taste.”

“I know. I’m sorry,” he says, accepting his anger well. “You have every right to be angry. I’m sorry. I can’t say the same for my father, but I really am very sorry.”

Minseok breathes in. Breathes out. “Alright. Apology accepted. Is that all you came to say?”

Sehun looks at him, considering. “It would do you good, to release your anger somehow. Not keep it so bottled up.”

“And how would you suggest that I do that?” he stares at Sehun.

He sits up a little straighter, and his eyes glint. He’s not quite smiling, but there’s a ghost of it gracing his lips.

“With me.”

Minseok stares on. “Sehun, if you think I’m that angry with you. I could never yell at you, or hurt you-”

“No, that’s not what I mean,” he says. “I just mean. If you think about it, how could you make _them_ hurt, the way they’ve hurt you?”

“I don’t want anyone to hurt,” he says. It feels foreign on his tongue.

“I can tell you’re not being honest when you say that,” Sehun says. “You don’t have to be so _kind,_ Minseok. It’s okay if you want them to hurt, too.”

“Why would I? _How_ would I?”

“With me,” Sehun says again. He’s smirking. Minseok doesn’t understand. “I don’t want to be too forward-“

“But you are,” Minseok says, lookin at him. Sehun has the bit of decency to look a little sheepish.

“But. Think about it,” he says, “What if your wife, the wife who cheated on you with my dad-“

“You’re pushing it, Sehun,” he bites.

“Sorry, But. What if she, they, say. Found you, in a position similar to the way you found them?” he says. And Minseok understands.

“With you,” he finishes. Sehun gives him a little smug smile.

Minseok wants to drown himself. A little. A lot.

“No,” he says decisively, and Sehun’s smile drops slightly. “That isn’t - _no._ That’s so incredibly selfish.”

“Selfish like the way they’ve been fucking and falling in love behind your back?” Sehun retorts, and Minseok freezes.

Falling in love. He, he had assumed, but to hear it confirmed somehow.

It’s difficult not to be crushed.

“What would be in it for you, anyway?” he redirects the conversation, trying not to show his moment of weakness in front of him, and it’s such a strange position to be in. To be more or less propositioned to make his wife jealous, and Sehun is very attractive, but. It doesn’t make much sense.

“I would get to help you out with her,” he says, explains. “And. With my dad.”  
“If this is some twisted way to agitate your father even more-”

“It is, but it’s not just that,” Sehun says, tries to get him to understand. “It will make _him_ mad. Him, and. You should have your chance to get back at him for embarrassing you, for giving you so much grief.”

“And why must it be through. _You,_ in that manner?”

“Because, if he were to discover you were fucking _his son,”_ Sehun says, “you’d imagine he’d have quite a field day. And, really. Again, I don’t mean to be so forward-“

“But you are.”

“-But you are just about the most beautiful person I’ve ever met,” he says directly. Minseok tries not to blush, because he’s still so _confused,_ somehow appalled, but also not. Trying to figure out what he’s feeling. “And it really wouldn’t be a hardship.”

‘Your intentions aren’t in the right place, Sehun,” he says, stands his ground. “If you’re trying to help me, this. This isn’t the way to do it. I know you’re just trying to find a way to get back at your father for whatever reason, but you can’t _use me_ or my situation. That is beyond selfish.”

“I, I didn’t mean-,” Sehun says, blinking rapidly, “Minseok, that’s. I’m sorry. But I didn’t mean it like that.”  
“It doesn’t matter how you meant it,” he says, face heated. He feels even more embarrassed, even more humiliated. “It’s still demeaning. To me, and to yourself. I don’t want to use you to get back at your father.”

“You won’t be using me if I’m the one who suggested it-”

“No, Sehun,” he says. “Please don’t bring this up again.”

Sehun looks at him, looking like he has more to say, but. He drops it, nodding to show his understanding, and he stands. “I’m sorry to have taken up so much of your time. I really do hope things get better, sooner, for you. Really.”

“Thank you,” Minseok says, giving a small smile despite it all. It feels warm.

“If you ever need anything,” he offers simply, nodding again, and he leaves.

Minseok lets out the breath he’d been holding, feeling heavy, feeling many things he can’t quite name.

.

Sehun doesn’t come to proposition him again, but he is over at the firm a little more often. Comes to se Minseok a few more times, and they share a few words, and while things are a little strange to navigate through, Minseok does find that he does end up feeling a little lighter, smiling when he sees Sehun walking towards his office, always well dressed, with a smile and sometimes with food. He doesn’t always eat what’s offered to him, but accepts the gesture all the same.

“He still hanging around you?” Jongdae asks him, after Sehun leaves and Minseok has a tupperware full of black bean noodles and pickled radish on his desk that he’ll maybe give to Chanyeol, if Baekhyun won’t steal it, later.

“Yes. I, I surprisingly don’t mind it so much,” he admits. “He’s really been kind to me. It’s a little weird because he basically suggested we have sex to get back at Soeun and his dad-”

“What?!” Jongdae stares at him, and Minseok only just remembers that he hadn’t told anyone of that encounter. He blushes a little.

“I said no, don’t worry,” he says. “But he hasn’t pushed it. It’s been okay. He’s been trying to feed me, too.”

“You really should. Eat, I mean,” he says, giving him a concerned look. Minseok just smiles in turn.

“Don’t worry about me,” he says. He’s doing okay. Kyungsoo is helping him with his divorce, his wife is cooperative even though they refuse to see each other, and work is the same as it always was, despite everything that’s happened. People aren’t looking at him any differently, treat him well, and he’s close to being okay. Maybe, hopefully.

He has trouble sleeping, is never hungry despite never eating, and the drive to keep going is running low. He sometimes has trouble breathing and his chest aches with _hurt_ and he cries, sometimes, but he doesn’t tell Junmyeon even though he’s in the next room. But he’s getting there.

Jongdae doesn’t look very convinced, but Minseok pleads through his eyes, until he repents, sighing. “Please talk to someone. Not just Kyungsoo. He’s your lawyer, it’s different. Any of us. Just to rant or complain or be sad with. Please.”

“Okay,” he says. He smiles too for good measure, tries to make it look as genuine as he could.

Jongdae keeps on looking, before saying eventually, “You have that meeting with him later in the afternoon, don’t you?”

“I do,” he says, sighing. As he’s been doing too often, these past few days. “Jungsoo will be there to mediate, I think it will be okay.”

It’s not.

The first thing Mr. Oh says to him when he arrives and sits across from him, wide, smug grin on his face, “Sorry. I was out with my fiancée.”

Minseok’s ears ring. _Fiancee._

He had not even been aware. That their relationship was as so deep that they would be engaged, when they are not even legally separated yet.

His blood runs cold.

“Well. We should get to the matter at hand, in any case,” Jungsoo tries to mediate, but the look in Mr. Oh’s eyes. Minseok has worked for him long enough to know what it means, that this is something he means to dig deep. To hurt, to weaken. “If we can please focus, gentlemen-”

“I have no qualms about continuing to work with Mr. Kim,” Mr. Oh says, words coated with an amiable lacquer, evident in the way he looks at Minseok, coldly kind, the slight tilt of his lips giving away his nature. “Will he the same of me? That’s where your problem lies.”

“No, it’s not,” Jungsoo says, and Minseok stays quiet. His hands try not to shake on his lap. “The problem lies in your conduct and behavior, Mr. Oh.”  
“I beg your pardon?” his eyes slant. Jungsoo stands his ground, and MInseok stares at the table. He’s completely unsure of what to feel. He feels like he’s drowned.

“Things have been, how do I say,” he begins to explain, sighing, “less than ideal. We’re getting many questions, from investors and clients and. Your dalliance is no small scandal.”

“I fell in love, what of it?” The very tone of his voice makes Minseok’s chest tight with pain. He was suddenly out of words, and though he didn’t have very many of them to begin with, it felt like it was a loss. Not being able to speak up for himself.

“You don’t understand,” Jungsoo says. “You were found to be in an intimate relationship with a woman _still married._ To one of your _best partners.”_

“The media and publicity don’t matter to me.”

“That can be so, but, I have to be frank with you,” Jungsoo says. “The firm is receiving the brunt of this, and your employees will feel the repercussions. And your _behaviour,_ the way you have betrayed one of the men most respected in this company-”

“I am _still_ the head of this firm,” he says, eyes narrowed. “Am I not? Am I not _the_ most respected person here?”

Jungsoo stares at him. Minseok is grateful for him when he says, “You’re not getting much respect from me now, I must tell you.”

“Regardless of what people think of me, I am still the foremost authority of this firm,” he says, “And, frankly, you don’t threaten me, Jungsoo. Much less a subordinate who wasn’t intelligent enough to realize that his wife was no longer in love with him and chose to move on.”

“I may not have this ‘intelligence,’” Minseok forces himself to speak, blood boiling, so genuinely angry, so still hopelessly foolish in love with his wife that this hurts, to a very personal, heartbreaking degree. “But I certainly have much more dignity than you, Mr. Oh. You may be my boss, but certainly have lost any sort of credibility. My words may not matter all that much to you, and you may be engaged to Soeun, but the bridges you’ve burned and the people you’ve hurt to get what you wanted will show for itself.”

“I’m afraid to tell you that your words don’t scare me, Minseok,” he says, air of superiority around him. MInseok can’t quite believe that this was ever what he had ever aspired to. That this man was ever what he wanted to be like.

“My wife is in poor hands,” he says, and Mr. Oh glares at him. Minseok has had enough. He stands, saying as he bows to Jungsoo, “It is evident that this meeting will get us nowhere today, sir. I’ll be taking my leave now.”

“You cannot tell me you _wasted_ my time by making me come to this fruitless meeting?” Mr. Oh says, and Minseok refuses to breathe in his direction.

“Thank you, I’ll be going now,” he says, and Mr. Oh glares at him, but he doesn’t care. Can’t be in the same room as him, can’t do that to himself.

He leaves, Feeling hollow and angered, and he goes straight to his office, Chanyeol looking alarmed as he follows him in.

“Minnie?”

Minseok can’t breathe. He’s feeling everything and nothing.

He doesn’t know what to do. So, he doesn’t know why he says, “Is Sehun still here?”

Chanyeol blinks, eyes wide. “Um. He just came back from rehearsals with a Jongin, he said? He’s with Baekhyun-”  
“Look for him, for me. Please,” Minseok says, and Chanyeol stares at him. “I need a word.”

“Minnie. Did,  I mean. What happened?” he asks, but Minseok shakes his head.

“I just.  I need to ask him some things,” he says, but what specifically, he doesn’t know. He’s unsure of everything. But he knows, he thinks. He wants to see Sehun.

Chanyeol looks at him for another moment, before he nods, and leaves the room, acquiescing to his request.

He sits behind his desk, mind racing, but he feels empty. Has so many questions but it’s almost as if he doesn’t want to know the answer to any of her. Doesn’t know what to do.

Sehun doesn’t make him wait long. Within minutes, Chanyeol is bringing him into the room, and Sehun looks at him, expression curious, but quite blank.

“Chanyeol, lock the door on your way out, please. We are not to be disturbed,” Minseok says, and Chanyeol nods, looking concerned, but does as he’s told. The silence is palpable.

“Hi, Minseok,” he greets him. Minseok can barely nod in return. “What is it?”

“Did you know that your father and my wife are engaged?” he asks in a single breath.

Sehun stares. “They’re getting married?”

“He called her his fiancee,” Minseok says, struggling through the words. His head is spinning, a little. “Did you know?”

“I, I did not,” he says. He looks concerned, steps a bit closer, “Minseok, are you okay?”

He doesn’t know what to say. “She. She’s getting married to him. She said _yes_ to _him.”_

“Minseok,” Sehun steps closer still. He looks like he wants to reach out, but he doesn’t. Minseok doesn’t know if he’s thankful or not. Feels all around very strange. “Do you want to talk about it?”

He doesn’t. That much, he knows. He looks up from where he’d been staring down, and Sehun is so close. Eyes a little brighter, but his eyebrows showing his real concern, and. Minseok looks down slightly, and.

His mouth is so pretty.

He shuts his eyes, rubbing them vigorously, and Sehun seems to mistake this for crying, because he comes closer, and pulls him into an embrace. Not tight enough that Minseok couldn’t pull out if he wanted, but. The proximity is nice, much nicer than he wants to admit to himself, and Sehun is soft despite all the strong, sharp angles of his body, the broadness of his shoulders, and he tucks his face into his neck, so, so confused.

“How can I help you?” Sehun asks him, and Minseok really doesn’t know. He hates, _hates_ feeling so lost. “Is there anything I can do, to make you feel better?”

“We. We haven’t even signed any papers yet,” he says, hating how small his voice sounds. “She. They-”

“Stop thinking about them,” Sehun say, leans back slightly, looks at him. “They don’t deserve your time, or efforts. No more. You have _always_ deserved better.”

Minseok feels himself pause. He looks up, and Sehun is so close. He’s beautiful, and a lot of things Minseok doesn’t deserve right now.

He leans up, presses his mouth against Sehun’s lips, and there’s a whole shift in the room.

Sehun pauses against him for a few moments. Minseok is very afraid he’d done the wrong thing, makes to move away, but Sehun surges forward, kissing him back, opening his mouth for him, and Minseok breathes. Takes what is being offered to him, slipping his tongue into his mouth, not knowing what he’s doing, but. His body seems to know, his hands moving to the back of Sehun’s pants, slipping into his back pockets and drawing him even _closer,_ and he licks in. Deeper, deeper still, tongue so deep into Sehun’s very willing mouth, and Sehun. Sehun feels too good, much more than what he feels he deserves.

They pull apart after too long, or maybe too short. He can’t tell. Sehun’s lips are kiss bitten plump, his eyes bright and wider than they were before, and there is a flush across his cheeks that makes him look delectable.

“I’m sorry,” he says, feeling foolish. “I, I should have asked.”

“I’ll ask now, then,” Sehun says, and his voice is low. “I want to kiss you again. I want to do _more._ Will you let me? Will, will you let yourself?”

Minseok breathes. Doesn’t know what to think, but realizes. For once, maybe for now, thinking _won’t_ help him.

And he gives in, and he nods, says, “Yes. Yes.”

It’s automatic, Sehun surging down to kiss him again, deeper, harder, and Minseok stops thinking. Presses himself close and tastes him, taking more and more and it feels. _Good._

Sehun is tall, achingly handsome and broad, but he yields easily under Minseok’s touch, moans into his mouth and quiets and Minseok’s lightest pinch of his hip, and Minseok breathes in, breathes him in, and does what feels right. Bites his lip and licking across his skin and making it dirty, leads them over to his desk, and Sehun goes easily, follows, falls under him, gives him anything he wants.

Minseok wants him, Sehun making him feel hot everywhere, and. It’s a bit like he’s feeling a little more alive.

“Is. Is your offer-”

“Yes, _yes,”_ Sehun finishes without preamble, kissing him again, falling so easily, too easily. Wonderful boy. “I’ll do _everything_ you want.”

“You trust me too much,” he says, but Sehun shakes his head.

“I want this,” he says, and Minseok sees it. Knows he’s speaking honestly. “Wanted this even when it wasn’t allowed. I _want you._ Let yourself want me, even just for now.”

He breathes. He wants. “Suck me off.”

His words are harsh on his tongue, and Sehun seems to thrive off it. Makes him sit in his chair and gets on his knees, moving too loudly, and Minseok warns, “Sehun. Keep quiet.”

“I’ve wanted to do this since you were hired and you want me to _keep quiet,”_ he says, but he moves more carefully all the same. Slides his palms, up and down his thighs, and brings his head down to his crotch, and just breathe him in, mouthing over his cock.

Minseok bites in a gasp, says, “don’t get them wet. I’m still at work.”

“Fuck work,” he says, undoing his belt and getting at his fly, pulling his pants down. “I _hate_ this place. Feels like I’m suffocating whenever I’m here. But, after today. After you fuck me, here, in the place he built and poured his useless life into. Maybe it won’t be so bad.”

“How do you know I’ll fuck you, hmm?” Minseok says, and the words are coming more easily. His blood is thrumming, and he feels. A little more in control, a little more alive.

A beautiful, gorgeous boy is on his knees for him, willing and wanting to give him everything he wants. He doesn’t feel quite _powerful,_ but it certainly feels like it’s on its way there.

Sehun just smiles. Smirks. Pulls his half hard cock out from his underwear, his hand already touching him like he’s familiar but so new to him all at once, and Minseok moans, the sound coming from deep within his chest, and it’s lewd, _dirty._ Alive.

“Pretty, pretty cock,” Sehun stares, closing his fingers around him, and pulling, up and down. Minseok chokes, staring down. “So thick.”

He brings his head down and licks the head, and Minseok grabs his desk, knuckles turning white as he fights not to make any other noise.

Sehun teases for a long while, running his tongue over the biggest vein, over his slit, over his balls, taking his fucking time, tasting him, breathing him in, getting him hard. He looks delicious, worshiping his cock, but Minseok wants more. _Needs it._

“I want to fuck your mouth,” he says, almost under his breath. He watches Sehun lift his head up, eyes wide, mouth open in surprise. Then, his grin stretched across his gorgeous face, pleased and he doesn’t tease anymore. Merely answers with a, “Yes, _yes.”_

He leans down and takes his whole length into his wet and waiting mouth.

Minseok feels like choking on his tongue.

Sehun’s mouth is warm, wet and he takes him in, deeper, up until the base, and he sucks him, and Minseok is about to lose his mind.

It’s been so long since he’d been touched like this.

Sehun bobs his head, taking his dick into his mouth readily, and Minseok feels so close, too close, but he wants more.

But he doesn’t stop, and he brings his hands down, fingers in Sehun’s perfectly styled hair, and he pulls lightly. Sehun moans around his cock in his mouth, his own hands on Minseok’s thighs digging in to the fabric of his pants, and he sinks down on his cock further.

Minseok gives him what he wants. Pulls on his hair, and starts _fucking_ his mouth, beautiful tight wet heat and Sehun whines, whimpers around his length, the hum of his throat so _nice_ around his dick.

Minseok moans himself, pistoning his cock into Sehun’s mouth and watching, tears gathering at the corners of his his eyes, his cheeks and the way his cock would make them bulge at times, a delicious view, his pretty pink lips stretched around his girth, cock keeping his mouth so full. Such a sight, _so much,_ so _gorgeous._

Minseok won’t last much longer. Everything is too hot, everything too overwhelming. Sehun too beautiful and too good on his knees for him and taking his cock into his mouth so well.

“I’m going to come,” he warns. Sehun hums, and Minseok thinks he’s going to stop, pull off so he can jerk him off instead.

He starts moving his head even _faster_ instead, moving with the way Minseok is moving his hips to shove his cock into Sehun’s mouth, and it won’t take long at all.

He tries to warn him again, but he gasps and snaps, and he starts to come, and Sehun moans. Leans back and opens his mouth wide and catches his come on his tongue, and Minseok watches with wide eyes as he spills all over his lips, in his mouth and tongue, and whatever drips down, he catches with his thumb, bringing it back into his mouth.

He loses his voice for a moment. Feels like too long before he says, “Dirty.”

“I’m your dirty baby,” he says cloyingly, fluttering his eyelashes. Minseok swallows, tries to get his dry throat a little wet. “Your little cumslut.”

Minseok feels his cheeks color, but a rush of blood down to where he’s soft and spit slicked with Sehun’s saliva. “That’s too much.”

“I know it is. You seem to like it.” He’s not completely wrong. “Don’t worry, it’s just for you,” he says, and he’s grinning. There’s still a small trail of come on the corner of his mouth where he didn’t swipe back into his mouth and swallow. Minseok stares, fixated on it. On him. “Want to fuck me?”

“I’d be very stupid not to,” he says, and he wants. Really, really wants. And it’s been some time since he’d wanted to sleep with a man. Since his wife, he never looked anywhere else, not ever wanting or needing to.

But now, Sehun. There’s a want in him he thought he wouldn’t feel again, and his blood feels hot in his veins.

Sehun smiles, beams up at him, and he gets up from his knees. Settles on his lap, and he brings his head down, and Minseok tastes himself on his tongue, all over his lips. Tastes himself everywhere Sehun gives him.

Sehun pulls back, trail of saliva bridging their lips together until it snaps, and he’s delicious, beautiful on his lap, and Minseok. Minseok feels inadequate for him. For anyone, but for Sehun, especially.

“Oh, your office has a nice view,” he notes offhandedly, looking out the floor to ceiling window behind the desk, and it is a nice view. Twenty-two stories up, Seoul laid out like a grid before them, glass windows of the buildings beyond glistening in the dying sun of the late afternoon sun. They look down below, cars on the roads with people on their way home, streets full of them as well. End of a day, and Minseok is up here, lap full of Oh Sehun, about to fuck him, with half the office still outside the room, Chanyeol right outside his door.

His blood sings.

“Are you sure you want this?” he asks. “Want me?”

“More than sure,” Sehun says, grinding down on his spent dick, and Minseok groans, holding his ass in his palms. “So, _so_ sure. How can I not be? You’re perfect.”

Minseok shakes his head, and the words are all wrong. But Sehun holds his face in his hands, tilts his head to press his mouth against his, and Minseok’s chest is tight, heart pounding against his chest, and it’s so starkly different, from what he had been feeling the past weeks.

“Hmm, taste so good, everywhere,” Sehun hums, lips moving against his cheek, his jaw. Down his neck as he undoes his tie, the first few buttons of his shirt to lick down his throat, his chest. Minseok squeezes his bum, and Sehun moans, right into his ear, rolling his hips. “I can’t tell you, how much I’ve wanted your cock inside me.”

“You tight for me?” Minseok breathes, and Sehun whimpers.

“So tight, only for you,” he answers, and his thighs tremble. “Need your cock, need it, _fuck-”_

He shuffles off briefly, and retrieves lube and a condom from his wallet. At Minseok’s raised eyebrow, he just smiles ruefully. “It’s good to be prepared, isn’t it?”  
“Only if you were expecting it,” he says. Sehun just smiles a little more, somewhat shy.

“Is it bad to be hopeful?” he asks, ridding himself of his jacket, and, all while staring at Minseok, he removes his belt, unbuttons his pants, and zips down.

Minseok watches as he pulls down his pants and underwear, revealing his thick, long cock, red and hard just from sucking Minseok and making him come with his mouth, rising freely. Minseok licks his lips, staring at the tip spurt some precome, and he wonders suddenly how it would feel. To have Sehun sink into his body, split him open. He wonders, hopes for a next time.

“Open me up for you, Minseok,” Sehun says, climbing back on to his lap, pants off, and Minseok breathes slowly. Touches him, feels his warm, smooth skin under his fingertips, and Sehun shivers in anticipation. Jolts slightly when he squeezes his asscheeks, and Minseok watches him, can’t believe it. And he wants, severely, desperately.

He moves his hand, trails his finger down, and traces Sehun’s hole gently, but decidedly.

Sehun moans, loud, and Minseok brings one hand up over his mouth, fingers trying to muffle his noise, and the other, smacking his ass lightly in warning, not hard enough to make a mark or even cause any sort of pain, but. Sehun jolts, and moans, louder, sounds coming out garbled because of Minseok’s fingers in his mouth.

“I’m sorry,” Minseok tries, not meaning to hit him, no matter how lightly, but Sehun shakes his head, and Minseok can make it out from what he’s trying to say, _“Again.”_

Minseok breathes deeply. But doesn’t follow, saves it for later. Slicks his fingers up instead, and watches when Sehun throws his head back, neck long and glistening with sweat as his mouth drops open as Minseok pushes his finger inside his ass, circling around the rim and plunging back in, out and in, and he’s already humping his hips, trying to take in more.

“Wait, Sehun,” Minseok says gently, slicking up another finger with the lube Sehun had brought with him, and with the two fingers he pushes into him, the beautiful boy rocking on his lap clutches his shoulders, too much immediately.

“Fuck, _fuck,”_ Sehun is breathing, gasping, body trembling and falling on to him, lips pressed against Minseok’s, trying to kiss him, but it’s mostly breathing moaning against his teeth and tongue. “Fuck, hurry, _hurry, Minnie-”_

Minseok pauses at the way he’s almost shouting his name, and. His cock jumps, his neck warm, and it sounds disgusting, good. “Sehun.”

“Please don’t stop,” he pleads, whining. All the confidence of the person who had propositioned him, had given him the option of revenge through sexual intimacy, had been reduced to the gorgeous, whimpering, desperate boy writhing on his lap, begging to be fingered and fucked.

Minseok shouldn’t like it so much. But.

He thrusts in with three, and fucks Sehun with a pace that doesn’t stop, doesn’t slow, stretching him open for his cock, and Sehun keeps whining, keeps begging, touches him wherever he can reach. The room is warm, and the light is dimming outside, sky pink and blue meeting, and in the magic hour, Sehun looks like a dream.

“Fuck me,” he asks, eyes blazing.

Minseok gives in to his want, his cock already hard, leaking and wanting.

“Over the desk. Ass out for me,” he says, his voice coming out less shaky than he feels.

Sehun follows, does as he’s told. Bends himself over the desk, pushing his ass out for him, and Minseok swallows at the sight of him. Stands, and stares down to where Sehun is open, stretched by his his fingers, hole winking, waiting for him.

He palms the skin of his ass, making him shiver beneath him, and he glides up, pushing his shirt, his fingers sliding easily against his smooth skin.

Minseok looks, stares as he puts on the condom, wets his hard cock with lube.

Sehun turns his head to look back at him. His lips are shiny with spit, and his eyes are dark.

“Minseok. Fuck me.”

He forgets everything. Nothing else matters, not in this moment.

He takes Sehun’s ass in his hands, spreads his cheeks apart, exposing his little hole. Teases him with the head of his cock, prodding at the rim, and suddenly, Minseok cannot stand the teasing he’s doing anymore. Pushes in his cock in, filling him up all at once, stretching him open and his heart is in his throat with the way Sehun moans.

“Oh, _oh god, fuck,”_ Sehun is whimpering, lowering himself down to his elbows and spreading his legs, giving him more of him, looking and feeling like sin.

“Tight, fucking tight,” Minseok brings himself to say, overwhelmed. His hands grip Sehun’s waist, tighter still as he pulls out, slow, feeling the heat of Sehun’s body squeezing around him, unwilling to let him go, walls hot around his cock, and he fucks back in, impaling him with his length. “Fuck, your ass-”

“Min, Min, _fuck,”_ Sehun whines, and they’re trying to keep their volume down to a minimum, but the way Minseok slams into his ass, their skin meeting as he plunges into his ass, doesn’t allow for much silence. The slap of their skin, the slick sounds of him pulling in and out of Sehun’s hole, and the skidding of the table as they fuck.

It’s disgusting, and glorious. Minseok feels a little more powerful, something he hasn’t felt in a long while.

He fucks Sehun, driving his length into his hole, and watching him, and as good as he’s making him feel, as welcome as he is inside his ass, Sehun blesses him the most with the reluctantly soft noises he’s making, wanting to be louder, held back poorly by bitten lips and the wood of his desk. Also with the way his perfect hair begins to matte together with sweat, his perfect skin glowing with exertion and pleasure he’s giving him.

His eyes, almost shut closed, lips swollen with biting, beautiful broad shoulders laid across his table as he takes his cock, over and over, never failing to say how good he feels, how thick he is, how _perfect_ despite the fact Minseok is really not.

Minseok looks down, gulping down his words, watching as Sehun’s hole stretches around his thick cock, but it’s barely a hardship. He takes him in, _takes it,_ swallows up his cock into his ass and lets him into his body, give him the pleasure he aches for, make them both feel good.

He’s good. So, so _good._

He maximizes the slaps he’d been saving from earlier, a gentler one against the bottom of Sehun’s asscheek to try, and the high little moan he receives is music.

“More, more, fuck, more,” Sehun pushes his ass up and out, wanting it. “Give me, make me take it.”

Minseok does, doing the same, slightly harder to his other cheek, and he tightens even more around his cock, ass winking around him, and they both moan, chests shaking with it all.

He goes harder, slapping him with a little more intent, the skin jiggling with it, and Minseok watches as Sehun bites his forearm to muffle his moan, almost a shout, and he’s throwing back his ass more, meeting Minseok part way as he drives forward into him, ass cheeks rubbing and grinding against Minseok’s hips, taking his cock deeply, until Minseok’s balls are slapping against his ass.

Minseok chokes on his breath, even more overwhelmed, barely keeping up, but.

It’s oddly, scarily satisfying, too good, feeling this powerful, this good, this _obscene._ Hips smacking against Sehun’s skin, cock splitting him in two and tearing his ass in two, cramming itself into his hole.

“God, fuck, Minnie,” Sehun whimpers, reaching back, and he’s taking his ass into his hands, and stretching himself even wider, begging for more wordlessly. “Harder.”

“Like my cock, Hunnie?” he says, words foreign but feeling very right on his tongue, lowering his body until his lips are right against Sehun’s ears. “Hmm, like it pounding into you, cramming you full and fucking the breath out of you, baby?”

Baby. Been very long since he’d called anyone that. Soeun never liked it, too sugary sweet, too impersonal, she’d said.

Sehun moans, and Minseok likes the word, feels appropriate for him.

“Love it,” he says, and more seriously, despite the breathlessness, he says, “Like it, too. When you’re like this. Giving it to me, knowing you’re _better._ Always deserved better.”

Minseok breathes, cock pulsing inside Sehun’s body, and he hammers into him, pounding him full of his cock. And he realizes, that there is some sick satisfaction in knowing he was fucking his soon-to-be ex-wife’s soon-to-be new husband’s son.

On Sehun’s next moan, less controlled, the sound bouncing off the ceiling and making his ears red, but not enough to not stop him from _ramming_ his length into his ass, plunging in and stuffing him full and hard and rough, he realizes again that fucking Sehun, making him whine and moan and beg, bending over for him as he takes his cock into his willing ass in the office that the man that had taken everything from him had built, is even adding even more insult to injury.

He fucks Sehun harder for it, makes him feel even _better,_ giving him his cock, in and out of his asshole, and hearing him whine for it.

He didn’t know what to think of the word, but Sehun, Really might just be a cumslut, for him.

“Oh, _oh fuck,”_ he breathes, his knuckles white where he’s stretched out his arms and clutching the edge of the desk in front of Minseok, looking utterly delicious. Minseok hadn’t known, that he can make someone feel like this. “So close, so _fucking close.”_

“Going to come on my cock, Sehun?” he mutters, and the words keep coming. “Going to show me how much you like it? How good it makes you feel?”

Sehun whimpers, biting his arm hard, his sleeve damp from his spit as he’s railed from behind, and Minseok goes even _harder._ Buries his cock into his warm, tight heat, with hard thrusts that slam Sehun on to the desks making it skid across the floor slightly, skin slapping and table rocking so, so telling of what they’re doing.

Sehun feels _so good,_ and he tells him as much. “Your ass, _so tight._ Squeeze a little more, baby.”

Sehun does, clenching around his cock with everything in him, and the next thrust in is so gloriously, achingly tight, and Minseok throws his head back once, staring at the ceiling as he lets himself moan, and Sehun squeezes again on the next push. Minseok slaps his cheeks, together, and their bodies are shaking with pleasure.

“A little more, so close, so, _oh, oh Minseok!”_ Sehun is crying out loud, too loudly, and he’s standing suddenly, head thrown back as his whole body shakes with his impending orgasm.

Minseok holds him, pulls him back to his body and holds his ass in place as he grinds his cock inside, cramming him full, and Sehun lays his head on his shoulder, struggling to lower himself, and Minseok helps him along. One arm around his waist, the other hand holding his ass, keeping his hole open as he fucks him, and then. Sehun stops, and opens his mouth, dropping his jaw, and Minseok covers his mouth in time to muffle most of his loud, loud moan.

He looks down, and chokes on a breath as he watches Sehun come. Hips moving of their own accord, long, thick cock shooting white ribbons all over his desk, untouched.

It’s disgusting, visceral and _beautiful,_ and Minseok bites the side of Sehun’s neck, fucking him harder, thrusting his cock into his spent body.

“More, more, _more,”_ Sehun chants under his breath, sounding fucked out, sated, pleased, and Minseok can barely keep up, heart hammering in his chest, sweat dripping down his neck, chest.

He strips off his jacket, and pushes Sehun back down to the desk, right on top of his come, marking his shirt and all over his torso, and the way he so willingly goes makes Minseok fuck him even harder, lifting up the back of his shirt, holding his waist and bringing back his ass to his pistoning cock.

He’s close, heat swirling in his belly, and Sehun must be able to tell, because he lifts his head up slightly, looking back towards him, smug little smirk on his face and mouth dripping down in a whined moan, before  he says, “Come on, Minnie. A little harder. Want you to come on my back-“

Minseok grunts, slaps his ass as he rams in harder, stuffing him full of him, so, _so close._

It doesn’t take long at all. He gasps, feeling his brain pause suddenly at the overwhelming sensation of all the pleasure, and it’s a split second as he pulls out of Sehun’s ass, stripping off the condom and squeezing his length between Sehun’s cheeks.

It’s barely two, three thrusts, fucking between his ass cheeks, before he’s lifting up the back of Sehun’s shirt, and spilling his come all over his lower back. So much, enough that a small pool of it slides down to the dip of Sehun’s spine, splashes of it spotting his back.

He chokes, staring at it, thinking nothing has ever been more beautiful.

“Hmm, _hmmm,_ fuck,” Sehun hums, smiling, turning back, trying to get a look at the mess Minseok had made all over him. He looks too pleased. “I’ll be fucking myself to this forever.”

Minseok shuts his eyes, unable to take him. Needs to breathe.

The sky is almost completely dark outside. The office is considerable more quiet outside the door, a reminder of the end of the workday.

He hadn’t realized how long they’d been. Been doing what they’d been doing.

“Thank you, Sehun,” he says, and Sehun gives him a small pout.

“I like it more when you called me Hunnie.”

A pause. “I did?”

“Hmm, when you were destroying my ass,” he says, and he’s too much, entirely too much.

When he makes to move away, however, Sehun stops him. Says, “Give me your phone.”

Minseok had just come all over his back, winded from such a strong orgasm, so he blames it on just having fucked the breath out of a gorgeous man when he brainlessly, thoughtlessly gives his phone to him, unlocking it along the way.

Sehun is quiet as he taps on the screen for a few moments, still plastered on to the top of his desk, and he’s handing his back to him, saying, “Take a picture of me, like this.”

“What?” he blinks, face turning red.

“For the caller ID,” he says, voice low and sultry as he arches his back, emphasizing Minseok’s come marking him all over. “Come on. Take it.”

Minseok pauses. Stares down at him, the _immaculate,_ perfect image of Sehun on his belly for him, _cumslut_ that he is. And, he stops thinking, and positions his camera to get him at a parallel angle, making sure to get at least some of his face in the photo, but mostly his back, his come spilled all over him, thickly gathered on his spine and splattered all over his skin, his cock just visible where it stays rooted between his ass cheeks, and he feels his neck warm all over again when he takes the picture, saving it for his contact details, and, bravely, to his camera roll.

“Let me see,” Sehun says, twisting around a little, still mindful of the come on his back, and he looks at the picture, face brightening when he sees it, and he’s shamelessly moaning, touching his cock when he sees it. “Oh, _oh._ Fuck, that’s so. I need to send this to myself, wait-“

Minseok snorts quietly as he watches him text himself, sending the picture with it, and it’s not really the sex that makes him feel so. Fond, of Sehun. Just the way it is. He stops thinking again, takes it as it comes.

“You’re too much,” he says, and Sehun grins at him.

“I’m your cumslut, what do you expect?” he says, smiling even wider, standing up properly and returning his phone, and he’s getting dressed.

“Wait, your shirt,” Minseok says, finally seeing Sehun’s own mess staining the front of his shirt. “You shouldn’t wear that when you get out of here-“

“And why not?” Sehun says. “Let them know. Don’t be ashamed of it, Min. You aren’t doing anything wrong.”

 _It kind of feels like I am, though,_ he thinks, but doesn’t say. But he doesn’t stop him either, watching as he pulls on his pants, and he starts cleaning himself up to, face turning red belatedly, realizing how much noise they had made despite them trying to muffle it, and.

The mere thought, of him doing _this,_ in _this office,_ with _Sehun._ It was a lot to ponder.

“I’ll get going,” Sehun breaks him out of his thoughts, and as he turns to see him, he’s already here, kissing his mouth, pushing his tongue in for a moment, before he pulls away. “You have my number, if you need anything. Or _want_ anything.”

“I’ll consider it,” he says, and Sehun gives him a look, a smirk too smug, _‘You’ll come sooner or later’_ all over it, but he says nothing else. Unlocks the door, and Minseok can see Chanyeol at his desk, working too furiously, his big ears red as he stares down at his keyboard.

Beyond the hall, a glimpse of Mr. Oh. Eyes on his son, barely restrained rage on his face visible, and Minseok watches Sehun square his shoulders, proudly.

Minseok remembers the come all over his shirt. His face burns and his blood sings suddenly.

Sehun turns his head back towards him, smug grin all over his gorgeous face, lips still swollen, hair a mess of sweat and pulling from fucking. He winks, the brat, and Minseok is weak for it.

He meets Mr. Oh’s eye. The anger is boiling in it, but Minseok feels. Powerful, unthreatened.

Then he knows, he’ll come, _sooner_ , rather than later.

.

The whole office knows.

“How could they not, with the way you two were moaning through the walls and everything,” Baekhyun tells him, and Minseok. He would normally blush, or divert the conversation, feel generally. Uncomfortable.

He doesn’t feel that way now, for some reason. It’s not that he wished for everyone to _know,_ but now that they do, instead of feeling embarrassed. He doesn’t.

“He messed up with the investors today,” Jongdae says. Minseok doesn’t look up, still staring at where he’s trying to finish reading a case file, but he listens still. “He kept getting angry, forgetting what to say. Siwon said he looked out of it, and everyone’s not pleased.”

“It’s what he deserves,” Baekhyun says, but Minseok tuts at him.

“Because of his mistakes the whole firm will suffer,” he says. He sighs, giving up, and it’s not like the documents were particularly engaging either.

“Well, because of _his_ mistakes, you suffered.”

“Soeun is many things but she will _never_ be a mistake,” he says, bristled.

“That’s, I’m sorry,” Baekhyun says. “I didn’t mean it that way, Minseok. It’s just. You suffered a lot because of him.”

Minseok sighs, because he knows Baekhyun means well. And, he’s not completely wrong. But Soeun, for all that she had done to him, was still, for a very long time, whom he considered the love of his life.

“I know. Seems that things have been shaken up,” he says, but he’s not very sorry. He feels many things but that.

“Sehun, though,” Baekhyun starts. “He’s a good kid. Sure, he’s spoiled and he riles his dad up too often for it to be healthy, but he really cares for people. He seems to have taken to a genuine liking for you. From what he’s told me.”

“So you’re snitching on him, now?”

“It’s not snitching if it’s obvious, Dae,” Baekhyun retorts easily, “You think he’s been coming here just to say hi to us? His lil homo heart wanted to see if Minnie was faring any better since everything blew up, duh.”

“Well, I’m fine,” Minseok says, and they both look at him at him appraisingly. “Don’t look at me like that. I mean it. I, I _have_ been feeling less shitty, recently.”

“Is that because a certain _Hunnie_ let you nail his ass?”

Jongdae thumps Baekhyun’s belly hard for that, and Minseok only knows this because of the loud grunt Baekhyun makes, and when he looks up, he’s clutching his stomach, pouting and staring at Jongdae with a wounded expression.

Minseok _does_ blush, this time. But, somehow, he doesn’t feel so bad about it. Just says, “Is it bad, if it kind of is?”

They look at him again. They’re a great deal more serious, now.

“As, as long as you two are clear, with what you’re doing, and that your boundaries are clear,” Jongdae starts to say, and he pauses. Thinks, before continuing, and pausing again, before Baekhyun jumps in then to finish for him, “No, Min. It’s not wrong. As long as you’re both sure of how this will end.”

The words stay. And he thinks for a long time.

.

“He shouldn’t be here,” Kyungsoo is muttering, glaring at where Mr. Oh is talking to Soeun outside the conference room’s glass doors, looking smug as ever. Today was supposed to be an important day, moving forward, where they had agreed to meet in person  so they could decide things more concretely, how to divide their assets and Minseok hadn’t seen her in months.

She looked beautiful as ever. He recognized the dress she’s wearing, something he had bought for her in the early days of their marriage. Her smile was so bright, and her eyes full of warmth.

It feels like a stab in his chest, for it to not be directed to him, anymore.

It hurts, seeing her. Seeing them.

Things are getting better. He knows they are, because while it’s hard, he gets up from bed, and makes Junmyeon and Yixing breakfast. Does his work, goes back, and it feels less like a passing routine and more like something akin to what used to be his life, even though everything is different now. He knows it’s getting better, because the black sweater full of holes isn’t a comfort measure as often as it had been, something he climbs into at the end of the day, trying to borrow its warmth, relegated to the bottom of his pile of sleep clothes, to not get tempted, and thus far, he hadn’t been tempted.

He knows, because when he gets a text, looks and sees Sehun in a partial selfie, mostly of his eyes and bare shoulder peeking from beneath his covers, as he’s on his belly, flopped down on a bed with the words attached, _‘have a good day, don’t let them ruin things for you,’_ things look a little less bleak.

Things still hurt. Doing this still hurts. But it no longer feels as if it will kill him.

Things go well, for the most part. For the meeting, at least. Soeun is polite, and while her eyes show how much has changed between them, how much of their shared love is now on separate paths, she’s still kind, and the many years together have allowed them to work efficiently through everything they had to do, their respective lawyers guiding them through everything.

It’s really the after, that’s kind of a mini shit show. Or, at least that’s what Mr. Oh tries to make it into, coming right into the room as they stand, done for the day and much accomplished, a great bouquet in his hands of roses.

“Done for the day, my love?” he says, grinning widely as he hands her the bouquet.

Minseok pushes it away from her, saying in a hard voice as he glares at him, “She’s allergic.”

His face drops, but Soeun looks between them, and holds his hand in hers, giving him a reassuring, maybe a little frantic, look.

“No, it’s alright, it’s the thought that matters,” she says, trying to smooth things over, but Mr. Oh and Minseok keep their eyes set on each other. Kyungsoo stands stiffly next to Minseok, professional, says, “If you may excuse us. Today was very productive and it really would be best if we keep the atmosphere positive.”

“Yes, of course,” Mr. Oh says. He hasn’t stopped staring at Minseok. “I don’t want to cause any trouble. Just wanted to make sure my wife to be was doing well.”

“I’m fine. And we shouldn’t, cause any trouble,” she says, and she’s imploring with her eyes.

Minseok doesn’t have the energy to deal with any of this, choosing to make his way out of the room, Kyungsoo following him, but not without a little interruption, said with a raised voice towards him, “That reminds me, how is my son, Minseok? Seeing as you seem to have more contact with him than I do, these days.”

Minseok pauses in his steps. Breathes, and turns to look at him, but he makes sure his gaze is less than warm. “What Sehun and I do in our time is our business. If he has been seeing me more often than he has seen you, then that is not my problem, sir. He’s perfectly capable of making his own decisions on what to do with his time and who to speak to. He has deemed you not worth the time, then, if this is the case. Good day.”

He leaves, no longer caring, about Mr. Oh, about Soeun, about anything. He doesn’t want to think about any of them, and it’s only when he and Kyungsoo are in the elevator and when Kyungsoo asks, “Min, are you alright?”

He pauses when Kyungsoo touches his back carefully, and there is a slight sting in his palms. He looks down, and sees his fists are furled into tight, tight fists, and when he opens his hand, his nails have dug in hard, deep enough to almost break skin. .

“I’m fine,” he answers quietly. He can tell Kyungsoo doesn’t quite believe him, but he doesn’t say anything else, and they say their goodbyes in the parking lot, and he gets in his car, and. He can’t do anything else, can’t bring himself to start the car, can’t do anything but stare at the steering wheel, blank.

He realizes now, too belatedly, he’s really fucking _angry._ Things were going well. He didn’t have to be there, and it was evident that he didn’t know her at all. And. There was no reason for him to bring up Sehun, for him to be included in this, today.

His heart was pounding in his chest, and he brings out his phone.

He pauses when he sees the picture, his come streaked all over his back, and he

_“Hey.”_

“Sehun,” he says, heart somewhat eased by his voice, but. It’s not enough. “Are you busy?”

 _“Oh, no. I’m not. Rehearsals just ended,”_ he replies, and Minseok hears it. The slight breathlessness of his voice, and the little gasps he makes as he moves about. Minseok swallows, thinking of him. _“Why? Want to see me?”_

His voice is smug, but not cold in the manner of his father’s. His voice makes Minseok smirk, almost smile.

“Where are you exactly?.”

And that’s how he drives up to a tall building of glass windows, Sehun waiting out on the steps for him with a smile on his face, staying as he comes down and opens the door to the passenger seat to greet him.

“Hello - _mmph,”_ Minseok’s voice is muffled when Sehun leans forward to kiss him, tongue curling into his mouth and his hand gripping his thighs over the console.

“Hmmm, hi,” Sehun says, and the glint in his eyes his bright as he pulls back, corner of his mouth tilted up slightly. He’s skin is slightly damp, and he smells of perspiration from his rehearsals earlier, and Minseok finds that he doesn’t mind that much.

“Hmm, hello,” he says again, and he begins to drive, letting Sehun hold his thigh as he goes. “So, where do I go?”

And Sehun directs him as such, telling him where to turn and when to stop, and eventually, they reach this beautiful, tall building of glass, the facade dripping with money, probably, and he drives them down. To the lowest level of the underground basement parking, parks at a secluded corner at Sehun’s request. There are only three other cars in the floor, parked ways off and empty of passengers, lights are on low and it’s echoing and maybe a little eerie, but Minseok doesn’t really mind much.

“Nice place,” Minseok says as he turns off the engine, neither of them making any move to get out of the car, and Sehun snorts.

“Came with the trust fund,” he says. Minseok glances at him, confused, and he continues, “Part of the divorce agreement. Mom demanded that he honor it.”

“Was he not going to?” Minseok asks him, stunned.

“He showed every sign of disowning us, so. They came to an arrangement.”

“But. You’re his son,” he says.

Sehun laughs, completely humorlessly. “Doesn’t really feel like it, much.”

There’s a tone to it, not quite cold but it makes Minseok pause. Reach out his hand to grasp Sehun’s knee, and keep it there. And he says nothing else on it.

Instead, Sehun breaks the silence between them, sounding a little lighter, but slightly more quiet, tone more careful as he ventures. “So. How’d the meeting go?”

His hands find Minseok’s free one, and he plays with his fingers, in what Minseok supposes is a calming gesture. Minseok appreciates it greatly.

“The meeting itself was fine,” he says, and it’s the truth. As far as things had gone, it wasn’t as bad as he’s been expecting.

Sehun narrows his eyes, hearing the _‘but’_ he won’t say. “My dad was there, wasn’t he?”

“He was an unexpected and unwelcome presence,” Minseok confirms, and Sehun frowns. “But I didn’t have to deal with him much. It was fine.”

“Then why’s this on your hand?” he asks, taking his hand and flipping it over, so his palm is up and the red marks of earlier are exposed.

Minseok looks at the indents his nails had made, and he speaks only after several minutes, considering the proper words to say. “It was an unconscious thing. Really. I didn’t know I’d done it until I looked down.”

“He talked down at you?”

“He brought you up,” he says, and Sehun blinks. “Asked how you were, but not in a genuine way. Was trying to make me look foolish, like I was the one in the wrong. A home wrecker, kind of, for your family.”

Sehun snorts then, and he sounds incredulous, angry, when he says, “Home wrecker? Please. If anyone’s the home wrecker it’s him.”

“I can’t lie and say we did nothing,” he says, trying to get him to understand. He doesn’t understand much, himself. “We slept in my office. Where he was barely a few rooms away. We caused a scene.”

“And what if we did?” Sehun says. “Minseok. I’m not going to let you feel guilty about this.”

“I’m not guilty,” he says, and Sehun gives him a look, considering. “I’m really not. It’s just. I understand where he came from. But he’s still a shit.”

“That’s _right,”_ Sehun says, encouraging him, and Minseok knows it’s not good to dwell, but.

“It just. I felt _angry,_ that he brought you into it,” he says. Sehun waves him off, but he can’t quite shake it, even this much later on, staring at the dashboard of his car. “I don’t know. More than what he insinuated of me. I felt bad, that because I slept with you, he was trying to use you. I know we did it to get back at him, partly, but. It irked me, that he would talk about us in that way. About you.”

“Getting back at him was the very _least_ of the reasons I wanted you to fuck me,” Sehun says. He says it all so easily, hardly bothered or embarrassed, and it makes Minseok blush a little. “I slept with you because I wanted you. If he gets mad, well. That’s his deal. And I don’t care what he thinks of me.”

Minseok, despite it all, blushes. They don’t know each other all that well yet, and thus far, their relationship is predominantly sexual. But it’s been a long time, since someone had been so frank about the way he made them feel.

Soeun showed her love quietly, lovingly, and it was beautiful, but in the end, she gave that love to someone else.

Sehun didn’t mince his words, and his touches were even bolder.

Both were good, both made his chest tighten somehow, with fondness and want. But Minseok knows things are different now. And when he looks at Sehun, there is a brightness in his soul he can’t deny.

It’s been a long time.

“What. What do you think of me, then?” he asks him. He tries to hide the pinkness of his cheeks, but he knows Sehun sees. It’s in the way he smiles, smirks, really, but softly.

“I think you’re doing a great fucking job at dealing with someone who doesn’t deserve the kindness you still treat him with,” he says. His hand tightens in his, interlocking their fingers, and he leans over, his other hand finding Minseok’s thigh and squeezing. “And I really admire you. Really.”

“Stop lying.”

“Fuck off, you know I really do,” he says, indignant, petulant, and Minseok feels his cheeks heat up even further.

“You admire my dick, maybe,” he says, can’t believe it comes out of his mouth, and Sehun pouts at him. He’s already very fond of that pout, a dangerous thing.

“And what if I do?” Sehun says, and he comes forward and kisses him, heated, licking into his mouth immediately. Minseok can’t help it, he laughs into it, forgets how much younger Sehun is than him. All the energy and lightness of the years between them makes all the difference, and he tries to keep up with the pace he’s setting for them. For now, and for the pace of whatever they have.

“And me?” Sehun asks, right against his mouth, trailing his lips down Minseok’s jaw, and he pulls back, eyes bright, and his expression somehow, surprisingly, nervous.

Minseok doesn’t want him to be. Doesn’t want him to be nervous about anything.

“You really are just about the best thing that has happened to me since. Since everything blew up,” he says honestly. They’re big words, but they feel inadequate on his tongue still. Very much not enough.

Sehun’s eyes look wet. But he gives Minseok no time to ponder them, to truly look, because he’s climbing on to his lap, too gracefully in the confines of the car and his long limbs getting in the way, and he’s kissing him again, fully, tongue in his mouth and their teeth clanging, and Minseok reaches down, holds his ass in his hands. And he wants, wants him so much, less than pleasant meeting aside.

Thoughts of Soeun. Mr. Oh and their engagement and relationship and _whatever,_ who cares, when Sehun is grinding his ass against the front of his pants where his cock is stirring, already finding interest in the situation, who cares when Sehun is the way he is.

“Want your cock,” he says, straight to the point, and he way he rolls his body, staring down at Minseok as he brings a hand beneath his shirt, hiking it up to reach his nipple and roll it between his gets, lips plump and gorgeous, it’s not as if Minseok could tell him no.

“Not the kind of ride I was thinking of giving you when I picked you up,” he says. Sehun smirks.

“Let’s not lie to ourselves. It’s the ride we _both_ want,” he says, and he’s completely right. Minseok smiles, and sets his hand down on the front of Sehun’s pants, feeling him get hard for him. “Hmm, love your cock. Want it in me.”

“Brat,” Minseok says, but he doesn’t stop him from unbuttoning his shirt, and he strips Sehun of his own clothes.

It’s how they find themselves in the backseat minutes later, naked and exposed with nothing but the slightly tinted glass hiding them from whoever might come into the parking area at this time. Sehun is hovering above him, knees on the seat and gripping the headrests and moaning as Minseok stretches him open, quick and efficient, three fingers plunging into his hole.

They’re both sweating profusely, already, and Minseok stares at Sehun, stares at him everywhere, from his face, eyes shut and head tilted back and mouth dropped down as he moans, _“Oh, oh fuck, Minseok, more, fuck,”_ to his chest, heaving with his desire, his broad shoulders, his perfect body, his cock, curved up and hard and Minseok wants it, one day, sooner than later. Inside him.

His mouth waters. Sehun is gorgeous, and endless in his praise and voice lilting and high and breathless and Minseok wants, wants _so much._

“Want me?” he asks, other hand coming up, grazing over Sehun’s length, making him sob.

“Want you, fuck, _need you, need you fucking me,”_ he begs gorgeously. “Want your cock, want it so much, I’m your cockslut-”

Minseok closes his eyes, breathing deeply as he feels himself harden further at the words, filthy, making him hot, and as much as Sehun wants him inside him, he thinks, _knows,_ that he wants to fuck him, fill him up with several loads and more, even more.

He goes to roll down a condom on himself, but Sehun is shaking his head, crying out, “No, _god fuck, shit._ I, _oh,_ I want you to come inside me. Fill me up.”

Minseok pauses, and he _throbs,_ but he asks still, carefully, in as soft, patient a voice he can handle, “Hunnie, are you sure?”

“You’re safe, right?”

“I. Yes, I am.”

“And I am, too. So I’m _really_ fucking sure,” he says, and his eyes are burning, and Minseok wants, needs to cram him full of him.

“Sit on my cock, Hunnie,” he says, voice as controlled as he can muster despite the pounding of his chest, and Sehun doesn’t wait to obey. Raises himself immediately, aligning his hole with his cock, and he sinks down, quick, filling himself up and Minseok feels his heart stop, suddenly enveloped in tight, _tight,_ gorgeous heat.

Sehun moans, sobs with it, and he’s beautiful, sat on his cock, thighs shaking already, hands gripping the headrests on either side of Minseok, his ass throbbing, so hot around him. Minseok wants to devour him whole.

“You okay, baby?” he asks, his voice low, can’t stop from moving his hands to Sehun’s ass, squeezing and rolling and just reaching over, tracing where his cock is splitting him in two.

He watches his visibly shake, tremble as he whimpers, pumping his hips slightly, looking utterly delicious. Beautiful.

“Good, so fucking good,” he answers, breathless, arching his back and mouth open in a moan, ecstasy and pleasure written all over his face, lining every muscle in his body. Minseok swallows, watching, feeling so _smug,_ that he’s making him feel this way. “Your cock, so good. Such a slut for it, _fuck-“_

“You a slut for me, darling?” he asks, and Sehun cries out, rolling his hips harder, and it’s not enough. Minseok knows it’s not enough for him, and that’s a fucking good thing. “Show me, then, baby.”

And Sehun _does,_ like he was made for it. He bounces on Minseok’s cock, as much as he can in the right confines of the car, and it’s entirely ridiculous, seeing the windows fog up from their exertion and imagining seeing the car from the outside, silhouette of a body clearly pounding down and the vehicle shaking from their motions.

It’s ridiculous. Minseok feels himself get even harder inside Sehun’s ass, his little, gorgeous, fucking _hot as hell_ cockslut, and he can’t wait to fill him up with come. So ridiculous, but completely not.

“Ride me harder, baby,” he says, keeping his voice low, and Sehun needs. “Show me how much you love it.”

Sehun gives it to him, makes a show if it, throwing his head back and bouncing on Minseok’s cock, rolling his hips sinfully and Minseok watches it all, lump in his throat and eyes dark, and Sehun. He feels even better around his length than the last time, he thinks, so tight and hot and squeezing as he pulls up, and slamming down, their skin meeting in a resounding slap that it too much for the small confines of his car.

Minseok feels himself choke, so fucking aroused and so hard inside him, and really can’t put anything into words. Just feels, _so much,_ and he grips Sehun’s hips, tight, and plants his feet on the floor, and he _thrusts_ up, pushing his cock into Sehun’s hole as he comes down to meet him, the smack of their skin meeting louder than before, but it’s drowned out by Sehun’s shout, shocked and whining at being stuffed full.

“God, _god, fuck, fucking fuck me,”_ he begs, arching his body even more into Minseok’s, seeking his warmth, his cock flushed red, thick  and hard as it slaps against their bellies, dripping white at the slit.

Minseok is utterly enchanted, in a trance as he watches Sehun pleasure himself, riding his cock in a pace that doesn’t falter, rolling his hips and grinding his cock _in,_ or bouncing, lifting his body up and down and taking his length into his hole, like he was made for it.

“Doing so well, taking my cock like this. Such a good little cockslut, so fucking tight,” Minseok murmurs, making Sehun whine and whimper, ass clenching around him. Minseok is gliding his palm up, along the sweaty skin of his belly, his torso, his chest. Up his neck, before bringing Sehun’s head down, and he goes willingly, desperate with it as their lips meet. He attacks Minseok’s mouth the way he’s fucking himself on his cock, unrelenting, wetly, deliciously, perfectly, licking across his teeth and curling his tongue around Minseok’s, unwilling to let go.  

“Want to see it _dripping_ out of you,” Minseok breathes against his tongue, wants to taste himself in him, wants to lick it out, and it’s so much warmer then, so unbearably hot in the car, and he grabs Sehun’s ass, smacking the cheeks, neither hard nor soft, just perfect.

He drinks in the sob Sehun cries out, loud, and it’s not as if they could hide the fogged up windows or the obvious shaking of the car, visible, unmissable signs to what they were doing, but the way his voice is strangled up in a moan, high and whining and so _wrecked,_ it makes Minseok’s blood sing, makes him _want_ to let everyone know, just how good he made Sehun feel in the small space of his car.

“Oh, _fucking fuck, Minseok,”_ Sehun cries, throwing his head back, and he rolls his hips harder, taking his cock deeper, body uncontrolled in his seeking for pleasure as he brings one of his hands up, palm flat against the low ceiling of the vehicle as he rides, fucking himself, and the other on the glass window, smearing it, so fucking cliche, delicious. “So thick, splitting me in two, need your come in me, _fuck.”_

“How bad do you want it, Hunnie?” he asks, slapping his ass again, making him shake and whimper and his cock spurt against his stomach, so close, his thighs shaking with exertion, and Minseok is overwhelmed beyond words. Feels like he can’t do much else but praise him, goad him, give him his cock, touch him. He’s very close to giving him everything. “Tell me.”

“I _need you,”_ he says, almost instantly. It’s softer, still desperate, but it’s said gently, genuine, and it makes Minseok feel warmth. “Need your cock, need it filling me up and giving me everything, want your come, want, _fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck,_ want you deep. I’m such a slut for you, _fuck-”_

Minseok leans forward, licks down Sehun’s chest, between the lines of his muscles, tracing his nipple with his tongue before taking it into his mouth, pouring everything he has into touching him, rolling and pumping his cock into Sehun’s body, making him feel as good as he can, the very most of it, Sehun deserves.

And. It’s a bit of a wonder, someone as ordinary, unremarkable as him can reduce someone as toweringly beautiful as Sehun to a crying, whining, spoiled cockslut who begs for his cock, and it makes his blood sing, his chest burn with pride. He fucks Sehun faster, harder, and they’re both losing their minds, rocking the car with their movements, not being any bit subtle.

Sehun’s ass feel likes heaven around him, tight and warm and taking him so well as he rams his cock into him, driving into him from below.

“You’re going to wreck my car,” he breathes, watching as Sehun claws at the ceiling, the headrests, the seats, his nails leaving mars and scratches, and Minseok doesn’t mind, really. Just says it as it is, as an offhand comment, reaching back and rolling his asscheeks in his hands.

“It’s, oh god, it’s what you get, for fucking me so good,” he says, breathless, and Minseok smirks despite himself, returns the favor by taking Sehun’s cock, stroking it a few times, making sure to keep his touch light, teasing the slit with his thumb and collecting the bit of white there, bringing it up to his mouth

He hums, closing his eyes, and Sehun is delicious. On his tongue, around his cock, on top of him, the moans he keeps emitting, the whine escaping his mouth as he watches Minseok taste him.

“On your back, baby,” he says, but Sehun blinks at him, dazed, heaving in his cock, still hungry for his dick.

“Huh?” he mumbles, looking dazed as he sets his hands on Minseok’s shoulders, gripping tight, lips wet with spit and swollen with kiss bites. He’s gorgeous, and Minseok is more than overwhelmed.

He doesn’t repeat himself, but moves Sehun himself. Sehun makes small noises of confusion and protest as Minseok guides him off his cock, but when Minseok sets him down on his back on the cushion, his face brightens slightly, and he moves his legs to accommodate him as best as he can.

It’s a tight fit, uncomfortable, Sehun’s legs too long for it to be anything but awkward, but when Minseok settles on top of him, fitting their bodies together in a manner much too comfortable, too seamless, and he drives in his cock back inside in one achingly perfect thrust, it’s really nothing less than perfect. The way Sehun gasps and moans, head thrashing about on the seat and his fingers clutching Minseok’s biceps as he’s fucked, and Minseok can’t stop staring at him. Makes him so drunk on lust, fucking harder and faster.

“God, fuck,” Sehun cries, hole winking around Minseok’s thick girth, “harder, Min, _fuck-“_

 _“Such a slut,”_ he murmurs, making Sehun whine, sob with want, and he hammers into him, hips working furiously to give him everything.

“I’m, oh, oh fuck, gonna come,” he cries, rolling his hips under him, his whole body trembling as his ass is pounded into. “Fuck, _fuck-“_

“Show me,” he says, right against Sehun’s cheek, fucking him still. He reaches down, strokes him, once, twice, and it’s instant. Sehun cries, shaking as he squeezes his ass around Minseok’s cock, and his high is gorgeous on his face, his length shooting ribbons of white come between them, shooting up to his neck, and Minseok growls at the pressure around his cock.

“Fuck me, fuck me, fuck me,” Sehun repeats, gasping as his body trembles. “Use me, please.”

“Need me to fill you up?” Minseok breathes.

 _“Please,”_ Sehun whimpers, clutching on to him, and Minseok kisses him, tastes his beg on his tongue and it’s so sweet.

He rams his cock in, and Sehun melts, giving himself to him, letting him take. And take, Minseok does. Fucks him with hard, measured thrusts, pushing his length into his fucked out hole and Sehun spreads his legs more, moaning and moaning and he’s too much.

“Come, please come. Come inside me, make me drip with it, please,” Sehun doesn’t stop, crying and taking everything given to him. Beautiful, gorgeous boy, tight ass and Minseok can’t get enough of him.

He kisses him, teeth and tongue, and Sehun gives beautifully, easily. His ass takes him, so well, and their bodies fit seamlessly, and when Sehun reaches down, palms gliding down his back, then on his ass, rolling the flesh of what he can reach in his hands, and he lifts them, and. He _smacks_ the top of Minseok’s ass, the sound not loud, the sting barely felt, but it drives Minseok over the edge.

He gasps, pumping into him and his come, painting the insides of Sehun’s hole, so much of it, getting him wet. Sehun hums, smirking to himself as he takes it all, loving it all.

“Oh, that’s a lot,” he says, keeping his hips still as Minseok stops coming, and he hums again, pleased, taking in the loads of come inside him. “Hmm, your cumslut.”

Minseok swallows, and it makes him push into Sehun one more time, fucking his come into him, and he feels it, there’s so much of it. His face burns, but he tries to hide it, leaning down to lick Sehun’s throat, down his chest, lapping up Sehun’s release

Sehun purrs, fingers in his hair, guiding his head down his torso. He pulls out, and feels like he’s choked on his tongue when he sees his hole, pink and gaping, and come, literally dripping down from the rim, down to his balls, and Minseok acts on impulse, needing _more._

He brings his mouth down, to where he’s open and dripping, and licks around at where his Come has slipped out. Sehun’s reaction is instantaneous, visceral, loud, his whole body jolting and his back arching and the cry of want and pleasure he makes reverberating around the car. If anyone else is in the floor, they’re fucked, but Minseok doesn’t care anymore. He leans in, tracing a line from Sehun’s balls to his hole, and eats him out, stuffing his tongue into his ass, licking him out, making him sob and cry.

“Oh, _oh fuck,”_ Sehun cries, thighs shaking around him, his hole twitching around his tongue, and Minseok feels _powerful,_ equal. It makes him dive in with his tongue deeper, lapping up his own release from Sehun’s hole.

“Cumslut,” he breathes, and Sehun gasps, and he’s shaking all over, unable to control his body anymore. “Taste so good-“

 _“Minseok,”_ it’s a sob, desperate, whining, and Minseok eats him out, circling his tongue around the rim before curling it back into him, and his own body is aching, from fucking so vigorously in such a small space, limbs cramped and back bent over from leaning and making out with Sehun’s asshole, but instead, he’s spurred on, licking and teasing and rimming him.

He stops only when he doesn’t taste himself anymore on Sehun, and he’s crawling back up to him, and Sehun’s mouth is open and ready. He gives it to him easily, kissing him, sharing the taste between them, filthy, disgusting. Real.

“I love it,” Sehun says, voice hoarse, body dripping sweat, and Minseok holds him close. “Love being your comeslut.”

Minseok hums, smiles at him. Kisses him again, deep, heartily. “You’re extraordinarily good at it.”

He preens at the praise, “Best you’ve had?”

And. He doesn’t hesitate, but he’s not surprised, when he says, “Will ever have.”

Sehun glows, and kisses him again.

His chest purrs, and he’s sweating and his body is aching but. It’s a calm, and he takes it.

.

The next time he meets Soeun is by accident.

He comes to the apartment, needing to grab some old work files he’d left at his home office, and he didn’t think he would see her there. From what he’d known, from what Sehun had gathered, she had been practically living in with Mr. Oh in his too big mansion that Sehun hates.

He didn’t think he would need permission to enter his own apartment, one that he still paid for despite their situation, one he was sure would be empty today. He knows Soeun should have had work today, and when he comes in, the place is empty, and even looks slightly unloved in, untouched.

There’s not much different from the last time he had been here. He doesn’t know how to feel within the space, feels strange, oddly blank.

He finds his files easily, not knowing again what to feel when he enters his office, nothing changed. All his documents and deskspace left as he had arranged it; nothing out of place, it was as if nothing had happened.

Too much has changed. His entire life had been turned on its head.

It’s when he’s coming out of his office, making to leave the apartment, when the door opens, and he recognizes Soeun’s perfume anywhere. She’s beautiful, and his heart stops and breaks when he sees her enter the apartment, stroller bag in hand, and she looks up. Her eyes are round and surprised when she sees him there.

“Minseok.”

“I was just about to leave,” he says quietly, and she blinks, staring at him.

“You don’t have to be in a rush,” she says, “this is your place, too.”

“I wasn’t expecting to see you,” he says. The conversation is stilted, awkward and he wants nothing more than for it to be over.

He and Soeun may not have spoken much, the last few months of their relationship. But their conversations were never like this. Hard to get through, the prospect of it being over the leading motivation.

“I was just getting some things,” she says, patting the handlebar of her stroller. Minseok looks at it, and it’s brand new, expensive. It’s definitely not one he had given her.

“I thought you had work today,” he says. “That’s why. I thought you wouldn’t be here.”

“So you came in now to not see me,” she completes, and he nods. He’s never nitnhinest with her. Relationship or not. He supposed that’s where they differ. “It makes sense. But I took a day off. It’s. Um. I had to get some things. More things.”

“All your things. It looks like,” he says. She shuffles in her feet a little, guilty. He had suspected as much. “You’re moving out. And in with him.”

“It seemed like the next natural step,” she says, and he snorts. Can’t help it.

“Right,” he says, makes to leave for real, but her hand on his elbow as he passes by her to get to the door stops him.

“I’m sorry, Min,” she says. He doesn’t listen. Doesn’t want to hear it. “I promise you it’s not to hurt you. It just happened.”

“You cheating on me and breaking my heart _‘just happened?’”_ he asks her, and when he looks at her, her guilt lines her face. “Soeun, we were together for over _ten years,_ did that mean nothing to you?”

“Of course it did,” she says, and he watches as her heart breaks for him. He doesn’t want it. “I never wanted to hurt you.”

“You did anyway,” he says. “Why didn’t you _talk_ to me? If you were unhappy with us, or. Or if something had happened, why did I have to find out _that way,_ why with him?”

“He’s good to me,” she says. He wants to laugh.

“He barely knows you,” he says in return. “He’s cruel. He uses any opportunity to undermine me.”

“It’s because I was your wife-“

“It’s because _that’s he way he is,”_ he says. “You cannot honestly think he is a good person.”

She stays quiet, but he sees it. The way her eyes narrow and the slight tilt down of her mouth. She’s angry.

“He _is,”_ she says. “He cares for me.”

“He almost disowned his own son,” he says, “He abandoned his family. You think he will stay for you? Men like that, they don’t change.”

“Seem awfully concerned for that boy,” she says, and she’s close to hitting a nerve. Minseok stares at her, challenging. He won’t let anyone say anything bad about Sehun. Not even someone her had loved for much of his life.

“Leave him out of it,” he says, his blood hot in his body. “He’s done nothing to you.”

“But you’ve done _plenty_ with him,” she says, and he feels himself get angrier at her tone. She’s not wrong, but the way she says it, accusatory, demeaning. He won’t have it. “He’s almost a whole decade younger than you, Minseok.”

“Which makes him old enough to be your sibling,” he says. “Once you marry him, you’ll have a stepson just years younger than you.”

“What are you trying to prove?” she says, “that I’m awful? That I’m making a mistake? There is no shame in having stepchildren.”

“There _is_ now, because you cheated on me with someone I respected but can never look at the same way again,” he says, eyes burning with wetness, and he will not shout at her. Can’t ever bring himself to do that, but the alternative, it seems, is to break down in tears, and he will not, _never,_ let himself do that in front of her.

“And what of men like you?” she says. Her anger is quiet, simmering, subtle, but her eyes are blazing,, and she takes a step forward, glaring at him. “You’re all the same. You just want a warm body under you.”

“I just wanted _you,_ Soeun,” he says, and he fights with everything to keep his voice steady. “I meant it when I said ‘til death do us part,’ I wanted my _life_ with you.”

“Things change.”

“And your change just happened to include breaking my heart?” he asks, breathing hard.

She kisses him.

Minseok stops breathing, thinking.

She feels the same, her lips on his, her body crowding into his, small, lithe. But. It feels different, so completely inline what they ever had before, and it shakes him, as she kisses him, moving her lips and getting her tongue in his mouth and.

He’d been with her most of his life. He finds himself kissing back, his hands in her hair and pulling her body even closer, and she smells the same. Kisses the same.

But he feels his heart shattering in his chest, with how distant, off she feels.

“You missed me?” she says, between kissing his mouth, trailing her lips down his jaw, her hands all over him. “You missed this?”

 _‘Yes,’_ he wants to say, desperately, but. _‘Not like this. It’s different.’_

_‘I don’t want it anymore. No more.’_

_‘Not. Not with you. I can’t, with you.’_

She reaches down, down to the front of his pants, and he stops.

“No,” he says, and his hands shake when they take her wrists, making her stop. “Please. Please don’t-”

“Why, don’t want it from me, Min?” she says, and he feels, tastes the bile rise up his throat.

“Eunnie. Please,” his voice is too quiet. His cheeks feel wet.

She pauses, and steps back, looking at him. Her eyes are bright, familiar. What they once were.

“Min?” she says, holding out her hands to touch his arms. He knows she’s concerned, knows in the way she looks at him, the way her voice sounds, that she’s realized that what she had done wasn’t okay. “Min, I’m sorry.”

He knows she is. But, he can’t look at her. Can’t be in the same room as her.

“Minseok, wait, I’m sorry,” she says as he leaves, and he doesn’t look back. Leaves, until he’s back in his car and it’s only then does he realize that his face is completely wet, chest aching, and.

He’s so, so immeasurably _sad,_ and he can barely take it. **  
**

**.**

**.**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> part 2 to follow


	2. 2; though it often gives us pain

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> part 2

It comes back, severely. Enough that he calls Chanyeol, telling himself won’t be coming in for the day. Or the next few days. 

Baekhyun, Kyungsoo, Jongdae are alarmed enough that they message and call him. He doesn’t answer most of it, only answering the calls to lie and say he was fine, and just needed a day to himself and recuperate. 

Recuperate from what, he didn’t quite know. 

All he knew was that his chest was hollow, like there was nothing in his body to give him the drive to do something as simple as getting up to eat. Not even enough energy to cry, though that’s what he felt like on an almost constant basis, making his heart hurt, making his head hurt. 

It makes him think of every possible negative thing, of things that had happened to him, of things he may have done to people. Endless cycle of fault and it’s crushing. 

One bad thought leads to another, and it’s either that, or he thinks of nothing, and logically, he knows. Neither are good for him, but. 

He can’t bring himself to be so positive, to move on, to not feel this way, somehow.

He goes back to wearing the sweater, black, too big sleeves, holes along the collar and hem, and he hardly ever changes out of it. Not that it really brings him comfort, but. It’s familiar, it’s warm, and he doesn’t know anything else.

“Minseok?” Yixing asks him in the morning, “Want to have some coffee with me? The park is really nice in the morning.”

“No thank you,” he says, curling around the sheets. “I’m okay. Just. Just tired.”

Yixing doesn’t push him, but he sits next to him on the bed, and kisses his forehead. “Don’t push yourself for whatever you’re not ready for, okay hyung?”

He nods then. Yixing leaves the room, but comes back to set a cup of tea on the nightstand. He takes a few sips, and it goes cold the rest of the afternoon.

Junmyeon comes to him in the afternoon the next day, to bring him food. 

“You have to eat, Min,” he says. He leaves the tray by the bed, but doesn’t leave the room. “I. I hate seeing you like this.”

“I’m sorry for being a burden,” he says. He holds on to his pillow tighter, buries his face in it, not quite feeling security, but he can’t bring to show his face. Tired, a little ashen, lacking good sleep. Lacking any sleep, really. 

“No, Minseok,” Junmyeon says, and Minseok sees the guilt on his face, and it makes him feel worse, in turn. That Junmyeon and Yixing and everyone are being so endlessly patient with him, but he can’t bring himself to take care of himself a little better, the way they are. “That’s not, no. Don’t think about that. I, I hate not being able to help you feel a little better.”

“You’ve done too much for me, already,” he says, and Junmyeon looks like he’s about to cry.

“Stop thinking about that,” he says, sitting down on the bed, and he doesn’t touch him, stays far enough that he’ll leave if Minseok is uncomfortable, but near enough that he knows that he’s there. “Just. I want you to feel better, I want to help, and I feel bad because I feel like there’s not much I can do that will make a difference.”

“You really are, though,” he says. He’s tired, but he knows if he sleeps, he’ll just wake up again, listless. Feeling even worse. “Just by being here.”

It looks as if Junmyeon wants to say more, wants to say something else. Minseok reads it off his face,  _ ‘Then why are you still like this?,’ ‘Why are you still hurting this way?,’ ‘Who  _ **_hurt_ ** _ you?” _

He doesn’t say anything else, though. Lays down next to him instead, and embraces him, silent, steady in his support, love. Minseok lets him, taking in the warmth and familiarity of his best friend, and hoping for a better tomorrow.

.

Tomorrow is shit. Yixing and Junmyeon leave for work, saying they’ll be back late, and he’s alone in the apartment. He usually is, this past week, but it’s a bad, bad time. 

The papers have come in, from the lawyers. And, Soeun’s made changes without him. Too many, and he breaks down again.

_ ‘You’re killing me,’  _ he texts her, shuts his phone, and closes the curtains in his room, and makes to bury himself under the covers, but he doesn’t even make it to the bed. Lands on his knees on the carpet next to the mattress and he begins to cry, ugly, wracking his chest noises, and his face wet immediately, nose running, eyes screwed shut. 

He feels. Awful. Like dying. Like he can’t even think, paralyzed by. By everything.

He doesn’t know how long he’d been sitting on the floor, crying. 

But. There are gentle hands on his face, trying to wipe the tears as they come, but he’s crying too much. He can’t make himself look up, or try to distinguish who’s there. Maybe he’s imagining it, the comfort he wants to have, or. He doesn’t know.

He just cries, cries some more. 

His chest hurts, and the front of the sweater, the sleeves, is damp with his tears, and his head hurts. 

“Minseok,” the someone is saying, trying to hold his hands, but he shakes his head, crying harder. They let go, but then, they’re sitting next to him, not touching, but staying near, and Minseok wants them to leave. Doesn’t care if it’s Junmyeon, Yixing, Chanyeol. Sehun. Just wants to be left alone.

“Leave. Please,” he pleads, voice hoarse with it. “Want. Alone.”

There is a pause. Then, “Okay, just for a while. I’ll get you some water. Have you eaten?”

He doesn’t answer, just curls in on himself, and tries to calm his heart on his own, but he can’t. The disintegration of his marriage, his very incompetence, his everything. It’s not enough, and he can’t stop mourning. 

He cries some more, crying, and then there’s the warm presence again beside him. Not saying anything, not touching him. Just sitting with him, and Minseok won’t lie. It’s not magic, it’s not as if he feels better instantly, knowing he’s not alone. He still feels awful, still feels like he’s dying from heartbreak and this dark cloud ballooning in his chest and making it hard to breathe, making him feel more than useless.

But. The presence, it’s not as unwelcome before. He still doesn’t want to see who they are, but the warmth next to him is beginning to feel more comforting. He still feels like shit, but the hands that reach out tentatively to touch his bare thigh, respectful, gentle, and the silence shared between them, it eases his heart, slightly. Just slightly, not enough for him to feel much better, but. It’s something.

It feels like hours before he feels his head ease, his chest lighten. He’s insanely dehydrated, and his head hurts like anything from all his crying and sobbing, and the embarrassment is beginning to envelope him, rather than the sadness.

He looks up, and he wants the earth to swallow him whole.

“Here,” Sehun says, giving him a glass of water. 

Minseok doesn’t speak, doesn’t know what to say, feeling his face flush deep red, for crying so much, for breaking down so badly, and he can’t bring himself to take the glass.

Sehun looks at him patiently, and says, “Can I?”

Minseok blinks, not understanding. But then, Sehun is bringing the glass up to his mouth, and tilting it, hand out under just to catch any liquid that would fall.

Minseok blink more rapidly, and he feels even more embarrassed, that he can’t take care of himself, but when he drinks, the relief he feels is almost instant. Not just his thirst, and the slight dissipation of his headache, but. Being taken care of, like this. It. Feels much better, a little more warming. He finds he doesn’t hate it so much. Never did, from Junmyeon or Yixing, but now, it feels a little different, with the way Sehun isn’t afraid to catch the drops of water on the corner of his mouth with his thumbs, to brush back his hair falling into his eyes, to cup his face in hands, tenderly. 

“Why. Why are you here?” he makes himself ask. Sehun makes him drink a little more, hearing his voice, rough, sob-dry.

“I went looking for you at the firm,” he answers, taking a sip of water himself. His eyes are soft, his touch moreso. “Chanyeol said you haven’t come in for a few days, told me where you’d be.”

“And you just came in here?”

“I  _ did  _ ring the door for about twenty minutes,” he says, small smile on his face. “Turns out. You left the door unlocked.”

“Ah,” he says, remembering he had answered the door to get the mail. The letter. Had been too devastated to have the mind to lock the door after him. His face burns, at his mistake, at his carelessness. He’s a mess. 

“I’m sorry, if I barged in,” Sehun says, withdrawing his hands. “I’ll get going. I just wanted to make sure you’re okay.”

Minseok takes his hands. Holds them in his. Swallows his pride, calms himself, wills himself to admit, “I’m. I’m not. Not okay.”

Sehun stays. Takes his hands, and sits with him. “I’m sorry. I, I want to make you feel better. I don’t know how.”

”I don’t know how, either,” he says honestly. He sniffs a little, still sad. “I’m sorry you saw me like this. This, I never-”   
“Hey, no. It’s okay,” Sehun says, his voice gentle. Calming, and Minseok closes his eyes as he goes on to say, “Don’t ever worry about that. Don’t be sorry, you don’t have to apologize. You’re okay.”

His eyes water again, but it’s not out of sadness. “I must look pretty weak to you.”

Sehun blinks, and he says, “Minseok. You’re many things. Weak isn’t one of it. You shouldn’t go thinking like that when you’re dealing with all the things you’re dealing with, much better than most people would.”

He snorts slightly. “You found me sobbing on my floor.”

Sehun isn’t phased. “I can’t judge you for the ways you grieve, Minseok. But the way you’ve still been going to work, in the same place as  _ that  _ man. Give yourself some credit.”

“I’m just. So sad,” he says, and Sehun gives him a soft smile.

“No one will fault you for that,” he says. 

Minseok wants to say more, but. He finds that he doesn’t have any more words. Looks down at his lap, and he’s not surprised when more tears leak out his eyes, sad, a measure of his sadness. 

Sehun stays. Sits with him, sometimes wiping at his cheeks with his fingers, touch tender, but mostly, it’s all silent, not uncomfortable. Just is, sitting together on the floor, inches away from the soft bed, and when he stops, feeling he’s calmed enough, he looks up. The sky is dark outside the window.

“Oh, oh no. I’m sorry,” he says, alarmed, embarrassed again. “You wasted so many hours-”

“No, not wasted,” Sehun says. He smiles again. “Are you hungry? What do you want to eat?”

He’s not, truthfully. He only feels marginally better from earlier, but he knows he should eat. “Can you even cook, Hunnie?”

Sehun hmphs at him, still smiling. “I can! I just don’t have very many opportunities to.”

In the end, he’s perusing through the delivery menu pamphlets on the refrigerator, and Minseok tries to refresh himself a little. Drinks the tea Sehun had brought to his room a little earlier, and washes his face. He’s not quite strong enough, not feeling good enough to change out of the sweater, but one thing at a time.

“I hope you’re okay with Chinese,” Sehun says, later when he comes back to the room. Minseok is back on the floor, picking up the tissues and other trash that accumulated throughout the days. Sehun bends down to help him, waving him off when Minseok tries to tell him he could do it on his own.

He’s touched, and it’s not like he didn’t know that Sehun was awfully kind, but it curls around his heart, warm, gentle. He likes the feeling very much. 

“Are you feeling better?” he asks, and when they’re done, Minseok sits back on the floor, not quite ready for the comfort of the bed yet. Sehun follows, sitting close, leaning against the side of the bed. He carefully sets his hand on Minseok’s thigh, care under the sweater and the boxers he’s made himself wear, and Minseok lets him, feels a little more comfort with the touch.

“I think. I’m not so sure,” he says. He pauses, and lets out a small sigh. “My wife. Ex-wife. She, we saw each other the other day. And she kissed me. Well. Tried to do more, too.”

It’s the first time he’s admitting it out loud. Sehun looks at him, alarmed, stunned. 

“Did she,” he says, considering his words, “Did she assault you? Do something you didn’t like?”

Minseok’s chest hurts a little, because, “No. I wouldn’t call it that. It, it was a surprise, but I didn’t really push her away. I’ve been with her a long time, and I know she wouldn’t do anything I didn’t really want. She’s selfish, but she’s not unkind.”

“You let her kiss you?”

“Yes and no,” he answers, sighing. “I liked kissing her again. But only for a moment. When she tried to do more, I couldn’t, anymore. I pushed her away.”

Sehun looks at him, considering. No judgment in his eyes, just thinking, thoughtful, careful, “So. You still love her.”

A statement, not hurt, not questioning, just is. Minseok’s heart hurts, “It’s complicated.”

Sehun is patient, waiting for him to move on, to explain or not explain, but Minseok says, continues, “A part of me always will. It broke my heart, when she filed for divorce. I still loved her even when I found her in bed with another man. Your dad.”

“The dipshit,” Sehun supplies. Minseok smiles, painful, but genuine. 

“But. It’s not that easy,” he says, sighing. “Not easy at all. Falling out of love. I don’t love her that way anymore, not enough to stay. But. It’s hard. You must think I’m stupid.”

“No, not at all,” he says, and he holds his hand. “You’re not stupid. I kind of understand. Not completely, but. I get where you’re coming from. Really.”

Minseok feels his chest. Exhale, somewhat. Not completely, but the air comes back slowly, and it keeps him calm, afloat. “Thank you, Hunnie. For staying with me. For listening. For understanding, even a little.”

“Of course, Minnie,” he says. His voice is soft, and Minseok leans against him, sighing. “I really would do anything for you, you know. It doesn’t seem like it, because our. Our, um, friendship, I guess. It’s unusual. But I really do care for you.”

He feels like crying again, but because he’s touched. Emotional. “Thank you. I care about you too, you know. Really.”

“Well. I’ve been told to get you to sleep and to change out of the ‘Depression Sweater,’” he says, and Minseok sits back up. Stares at him. Sehun shows him the screen of his phone, and he says, “Jongdae gave me Junmyeon’s number, so I could ask him for permission to come in here. He had very specific orders. It seems non-negotiable.”

“He’s a good person,” Minseok says.

“I don’t doubt it, you chose him as your best friend,” he says. He pauses, and he asks, “What does that make me, then?”   
“You’re a good person too, Sehun,” he says.

“Ah, but I must be a really  _ really  _ good person, if you deemed me worthy enough to dick down,” he says, and Minseok can’t help it, he laughs, amused. He guesses it’s true to some degree, but it’s still quite ridiculous. 

“You made me. Calm, in a time when I severely needed it,” he says. His cheeks pink. “You continue to do that.”

Sehun blinks, then the softest, most tender smile spreads on his face. He leans in, kisses his lips lightly. “I’m glad. You deserve much more than you get, you know?”

“I feel like I get too much, more than what I deserve, with you,” he says, and Sehun makes a face. Is holding his hand, pulling him close, and Minseok goes. 

“Don’t say that,” he says. “You’re always talking down on yourself.”

“I don’t really know how to not be so critical on myself,” he admits. Sehun frowns a little, and he’s adorable. Minseok’s cheeks pink up a little more at the thought. 

“I know this is, like, not really the proper argument to use, but if you can make  _ me  _ actually  _ cry  _ with the way you fucked me, well. You’re clearly much more talented than you give yourself credit for.”

“I don’t think sex counts,” he says, blushing, but still chuckling slightly. He’s feeling much better, and Sehun’s hand in his, the other on his thigh, is adding to the lightness in his chest. 

“Why shouldn’t it, though?” he pouts, and his little petulant whines are  _ adorable,  _ impossibly endearing. 

And Minseok appreciates him, cherishes him so  _ fucking  _ much. So, he climbs up and settles over Sehun’s lap, and cups his face. 

“Thank you, Sehun,” he says, smiles though it’s small, and he leans down, slants his lips over Sehun’s mouth, finds so much comfort there.

Sehun hums, bringing his hands up Minseok’s bare thighs, hands hot, stopping over his ass, settling there. 

“It’s no problem, Minseok,” he tells him, and he smiles, and in that moment, he truly, really looks his age; young, beautiful, and so bright.

It’s often lost, in the haze of Minseok’s grief and the urge to be close and get his cock in him.

He doesn’t feel that way, now, and Minseok swallows, before he brings his head back down to kiss him, but it’s immediately apparent to both of them that there is a heat present that wasn’t there before. Minseok opens his mouth, and Sehun licks into his mouth, their tongues sliding together and licking across teeth. The sweater drops off his shoulder slowly as he arches his body closer, Sehun helping him along and palming his ass, squeezing and making Minseok grind on top of him.

“Hunnie,” Minseok murmurs, lips bruised and swollen as they part, but Sehun follows his lips, neck craning as he chases and places little kisses against Minseok’s bottom lip, sucking in, Minseok trembles, clutching on to Sehun’s shoulders as he trails his mouth down his neck, over his exposed collarbone, pulling down the sweater further to reveal more skin for his teeth to mark. “Hunnie.”

“What is it?” Sehun looks up at him, eyes not quite gone, but definitely glazed over.

He looks at him with so much  _ want,  _ and Minseok shivers.

“Can I ride you?” he asks, cheeks heating, and Sehun squeezes his ass  _ hard. _

_ “Fuck, Minseok,”  _ he groans, and he moves his hips up, grinding them together, and Minseok moans with him, holding on to him for dear life. “Min, have. Have you ever been like that? With another man?”

“It’s been a while, but I have,” he says, biting his lip and adjusting his legs around Sehun to get more comfortable. 

“How long?”

Minseok looks down shyly. “It’s been over a decade.”

“Fuck,” Sehun breathes, pulls him in closer, “Are you sure?”

Minseok looks at him, and feels his cheeks red with his blush, but the wants crests in his belly, and Sehun’s eyes on him make him feel wanted, in turn. It’s been a long time, since someone had looked at him the way he does. “Please, Hunnie,” he says, bringing his arms up to Sehun’s broad shoulders, and leaning down to kiss him. “I. I want it, with you.”

Sehun moans, his fingers biting into Minseok’s ass, and licks into his mouth, tongue going in deep as he tastes him fully. 

“I’ll take care of you,” Sehun says, lifting the sweater to get at Minseok’s underwear beneath, inserting his thumb under the waistband. He kisses the mole on the top of Minseok’s Cupid’s bow, his other hand moving beneath his sweater, and rubbing his nipple between his fingers.

Minseok groans, arching closer, letting Sehun licks up his throat. “I. I will, too, I’ll take care of you too.”

They remove Minseok’s underwear in haste, almost ripping the fabric, but Minseok doesn’t care, gets back on Sehun’s lap, works his belt, pants, underwear off, dragging them down his legs until his cock springs free, and he kicks them off, and they land somewhere in the room, forgotten. His cock is long, thick, almost hard, and Minseok takes it in his hand, and it’s hot in his hand, veins along the length pressing against his palm.

“Fuck, you’re so big,” Minseok breathes, and Sehun grunts, cock jumping in Minseok’s hand. “Have some lube, baby?”

Sehun points to his pants, red high on his own cheeks, and Minseok smiles, kisses him. “Get naked, I’ll go get it.”

And he does, back towards him as he goes to get the things they need, and he hears Sehun shucking off his jacket, his shirt, and his moan, deep then high as he watches Minseok move across the room, his naked ass peeking from beneath the black sweater.

“Oh, beautiful, baby,” Minseok says when he turns back to him, and Sehun is naked, stroking his cock in his fist, tip red and wet as he stares hungrily at Minseok. And being with Sehun, it’s never not, in a way,  _ empowering.  _ Sehun makes him feel equal, powerful, more  _ wanted  _ than he has in so long. Like he has more control than he thought, and to someone else, it will maybe just look like fucking. But to Minseok, it’s. An acceptance, a comfort, a confirmation that things ending doesn’t mean it will be awful forever. “Want my ass around your cock?”

“Fuck,  _ fuck,”  _ Minseok smiles as Sehun throws his head back, cushioned by the edge of the mattress, and he squeezes the base of his cock, tip leaking white. “God, fuck, I’m your slut.”

“Don’t touch,” Minseok says, settling back over his lap and dropping the lube and condom next to them. He sits, and reaches back to guide Sehun’s almost completely stiff cock between his asscheeks, not once breaking their heated gaze. He gets his hands back on Sehun’s shoulders, and rolls his hips experimentally, clenching his cheeks so he drags along Sehun’s cock, their skin chafing slightly, but Sehun moans, grabbing his waist and thrusting his own hips to fuck his cock between his asscheeks. 

“Get yourself wet, Hunnie,” Minseok says, taking Sehun’s hand, and, with his eyes set on Sehun’s, licks across his palm, liberal with his spit. 

Sehun’s gaze darkens even more, impossibly, and reaches to where he’s nestled behind Minseok’s bottom, and he grabs his dick, wets it. The next slide of his cock against his skin is easier, and Minseok moans, body shivering as Sehun fucks his asscheeks, feels his own cock filling up, peeking from beneath the sweater. 

“Want,  _ fuck,  _ want to be inside you, want to fuck you,” Sehun says, whines as he bites marks onto Minseok’s exposed shoulders, body trying not to be limp but it’s difficult, when Minseok’s hips roll so smoothly, pumping and getting his already hard cock even harder between his ass cheeks, dots of white from the head spotting his ass as he goes.

“Hmm, want to fill myself up with you, cram myself so  _ fucking full,”  _ Minseok says, his face pinking, and just about an hour ago, he was sobbing, body almost completely dehydrated from how depressed and hurt he was. He’s not completely healed, he doesn’t think he will be ever, but Sehun makes him feel  _ alive,  _ like. Not completely worthless, and he treasures the feeling. He grinds down harder, shakes back the long sleeves and takes his own cock and pulls himself along, wanting to be fucked soon.

He reaches with his free hand for the lube, rips it open with his teeth, and pours it all over Sehun’s fingers. “Baby, stretch me for you,” he says, but before he’d even finished, Sehun had already reaches back, feeling for his entrance. The first finger is cold, already too much as it traces his rim, pushing into his hole slowly, carefully. 

Minseok grits his teeth, squeezes Sehun’s shoulders hard, nails digging into his skin as he braces himself. Sehun presses his lips against his cheek, nosing against the corner of his eyes, and Minseok melts into him, tries to relax.

“Minnie, take your time,” Sehun says gently, lips pressed against the corner of his mouth, finger slow as it opens him, pushing in, until finally, he presses in up to the knuckle. “Don’t get hurt. It’s okay, I can wait.”

“Just. I want you,”  Minseok says, and with them, it’s mostly been Sehun, wanting Minseok. He admits, now, to himself, to Sehun, he wants him just as much, maybe even a little more. 

“I know, I know,” he says, still fucking him with the one finger, refusing to give him more, even though Minseok kisses him hotter, harder. “But I’m not, how do I say this-”

“I know your cock is big,” Minseok says, and Sehun blinks at him, eyes wide, and his face turns  _ red.  _ “I want it in me. I want to be  _ wrecked  _ with it. I know you’re being careful, and I’m grateful, really. But prep me a little faster, baby. I can take it. I can take a bit of rough.”

Sehun looks at him, really looks, before he nods, Minseok watching the lump go down his throat as he swallows, and presses two fingers into him, still slow, stretching him out further, and  _ fuck,  _ it’s been a while. A really long while. 

Minseok moans, closing his eyes and willing his ass to take the fingers in. It’s a stretch, but he likes it,  _ loves it.  _ Loves the stretch, Sehun’s long, slender fingers thrusting in and out of his hole, sounds slick as they fuck in, and part inside to get him more open. His cock leaks, head rubbing against Sehun’s hard stomach, and Minseok rocks his ass back to meet his fingers as they push in.

Three fingers, in, and Minseok’s thighs tremble as he adjusts, pushing his ass back, and  _ fuck,  _ he feels  _ good,  _ feels sexy as he fucks back on Sehun’s fingers. He looks down, and Sehun is so  _ pretty,  _ his baby, eyes lidded as he watches him slide down on his fingers, mouth open as small noises flitter out, small moans and grunts as he stretches him, scissors him. 

“Do I feel good?” Minseok asks, and Sehun breathes, nods, hair flopping as he pours more lube, and four fingers push through Minseok’s tight hole, and Minseok moans, body stilling as he’s stretched, taking it in and it’s  _ a lot.  _ He breathes, and Sehun kisses his jaw, his chin. 

“Fuck,  _ fuck,”  _ Sehun mutters, hand going faster as he fucks Minseok’s ass with his fingers, and Minseok moans, louder than ever, rising up on his knees as he takes it, his toes curlingon the carpet. 

“Fuck,  _ fucking fuck,”  _ Minseok groans. He stares down at Sehun, feels feral with it when he growls, “Get your cock in my ass. Now.”

“Shit,” Sehun whines, rushing to get the condom on, and the  _ schlick  _ sounds as he gets his length lubes up are loud, filthy, and he’s lifting Minseok’s hem up with his clean hand, guiding the tip to where Minseok is waiting for him.

Minseok doesn’t wait. His arms cross behind Sehun’s neck as he sinks over Sehun’s cock, more and more, until his ass is sat on Sehun’s thighs, the whole of his cock cramming him so full he can barely breathe. 

He’s  _ thick,  _ cock nestled in so deep that Minseok feels like his body is about to break, hips aching and rim stretched impossibly around his girth. He  _ loves it,  _ takes in the ache,  _ takes his cock  _ as he adjusts, his ass cushioned on his strong, lean thighs.

“Fuck, Hunnie,” he moans, and the four fingers felt like  _ nothing  _ to this, so thick and hot. “So fucking  _ big.” _

_ “Minseok,”  _ he whines, cock so hard inside him, “You’re,  _ god, fuck.  _ You’re so tight.”

Minseok breathes, lit up from the inside and he pushes back on his length, getting him deeper, and Sehun melts beneath him, and he’s delicious, every inch of him. 

Minseok tilts his head up, licks over the plumpest part of Sehun’s lips, his baby yielding easily beneath him, whimpering into his mouth as they kiss, tongues hot and slick. 

He leans back, just enough for their lips to part, and Minseok smirks down at him, his chest light and ass so,  _ so full.  _

He raises his hips, up until the head of Sehun’s cock is the only part keeping him stretched, and Minseok breathes. Then, he  _ slams _ down, Sehun’s cock ramming into him, rough, hard enough that the slap of their skin meeting resounds through the room, the sting on his ass making Minseok moan, clenching around Sehun. 

“Oh,  _ oh,”  _  Sehun loses his words, pulling Minseok’s body closer as he repeats the motion, but  _ faster,  _ lifting himself up and pounding down, over and over. 

“Hunnie, your cock,” Minseok moans, head falling back as he fucks himself down, his hole crammed full and Sehun’s length thick as it reams him out, stretching him out and splitting him in two. “You’re  _ so big,  _ so thick.”

Sehun doesn’t reply, and Minseok looks down, watches him as his head flops forward, moaning endlessly as Minseok’s ass swallows his cock up. Minseok cups his face, brings his head up to look at him, his eyes glazed and lips wet. He looks  _ wrecked,  _ beautiful and overwhelmed already, and they’ve barely begun. Minseok is endeared, smiles down at him, and kisses him, tongue fierce as he rolls his hips, and Sehun moans into his mouth. 

Minseok gets his fingers into Sehun's hair, pulls just the slightest bit, making him choke on his breath, and Minseok murmurs against his lips, “Like my sweet ass, hmm?”

“Fuck,  _ fuck,”  _ Sehun whimpers, and Minseok kisses him, bites his bottom lip, pulls it into his mouth, making him whine harder, and it fuels Minseok, his chest on fire and he rides Sehun hard, pounding himself on his perfect cock and squeezing around him. “Love your ass, so tight, gorgeous.”

“Nothing like yours, but thank you, baby,” he says, and Sehun shakes his head, trying to disagree with him, but any words he might have had comes out strangled, when Minseok arches his body more and drops down on his length. Minseok moans, feeling  _ so good  _ and Sehun in to the hilt, and he rocks his ass back, fucking himself stupid on Sehun’s cock and his length so  _ perfect  _ inside him. 

He bounces on his lap, taking his cock and fucking himself, watches as Sehun moans, never stopping, head back on the bed and his hands on Minseok’s hips, and Minseok smiles down at him. 

“You okay there, Hunnie?” he asks, riding and grinding down on his dick, getting him as deep as he can, and feeling like a king, sat on Sehun’s cock like it’s his throne. 

“You’re perfect, Minseok,” Sehun moans, and his eyes are dark, dripping and the way he’s staring at him, Minseok feels like he’s being  _ worshipped. _

He blushes, because he hadn’t expected those words, and neither does he deserve them. Sehun, on the other hand. Sehun is  _ perfect,  _ tight body, broad shoulders and defined arms, stomach, but tall. Pretty, tight ass that opened right up for him, perfect cock that fit into his body like it was made to be there, fucking him hard and good, lips soft and knew just what to say. And he is kind, without question, though he’s a brat, and he’s the one that’s perfect. He could be fucking anyone but he’s with Minseok, who had just hours earlier been in the midst of a major breakdown, caused by what he’s suspecting was an anxiety attack. 

Minseok is work. He’s not perfect, but he doesn’t say anything as Sehun pulls down at the hem of the sweater, more, until the collar comes down even more and Minseok’s shoulders are left bare. 

“Hunnie,  _ fuck,”  _ he whines, unable to keep his voice steady as Sehun brings his head forward, sinks his teeth into his skin, biting down hard enough Minseok is almost sure it will leave a mark, if not even break skin. He gasps, pumping his hips, sliding down on his cock and he clings a little harder to Sehun, nails dragging down his back, Sehun moaning along with him.

“You’re,  _ fuck.  _ You’re so tight,” Sehun tells him, and Minseok watches as he struggles and chokes on his words as he writhes on top of him, impaling himself with his length. “You’re so  _ hot  _ inside, I. God, Minseok,  _ fuck.” _

Minseok pants as Sehun bucks up, driving his cock in even deeper, and he glares at him, gaze heated, and he reaches down, sleeve falling over his fingers as he takes Sehun’s hand, and brings it beneath the hem of his sweater, right over the lower part of his belly.

“Feel how deep you go, Hunnie,” Minseok purrs against his mouth, keeping their hands over his stomach as he lifts his ass up, and  _ slams  _ down, pushing back until Sehun is as deep as he can go. Sehun moans, his fingers spasming beneath Minseok’s hand, and Minseok goes harder, angling his hips and hammering down, the sounds they make together completely filthy.

Sehun swears, moans, almost  _ screams  _ as Minseok fucks down, and Minseok moans, stretches his legs further apart and so full up on cock. “Min-Minnie, fuck.”

“Tell me how you feel,” he says, trying to get Sehun to fuck him as he goes down, and the next thrust in is  _ loud,  _ and Minseok feels it so deep inside, and he gasps, and he’s bouncing on his cock, lodged so deeply inside his ass and his mouth waters with it, his eyes stinging with all the pleasure. 

“F-Fuck,” Sehun cries, his palm hot on Minseok’s stomach. “It’s. Oh, it’s like I can,  _ fuck,  _ can feel my cock, fucking into you. Plunging in, plugging you up.  _ Fuck,  _ it feels so good,  _ fuck-” _

Minseok kisses him, and everything is overwhelming, everything is too good and glorious and he can barely breathe. The loud squelch of his hole as it’s fucked, dropping down onto Sehun’s length and getting himself so full, he feels like he’s been lit on fire, a little more alive than he has in a very long time.

They go on like that, for minutes, for hours maybe. Minseok isn’t sure, but he doesn’t want it to stop, even if the carpet provides the littlest cushioning, the hard floors uncomfortable and rigid as he rides. Sehun is so  _ beautiful,  _ under him, moaning, giving him his cock and holding on to his waist as he  _ rams  _ into him from below, and he feels so raw, already so fucked out and when Sehun takes his ass in his palms, trying to lift him but  _ smacking them  _ by accident _ ,  _ Minseok gasps, lurching forward onto Sehun’s chest, surprised, but. His ass clenches around his thickness, and he moans the swears he has against Sehun’s throat, writhing a little on his cock, wanting more.

“M-Minseok?” Sehun says, looking like he was about to apologize, but his eyes are wide, dark and lips wet. Minseok counts the marks he’d left all over his collarbone, his neck, his chest, and he smiles to himself.

“Slap me a little, baby,” he says, surprised that the words are coming out of his mouth, but the heat in his belly builds up, his cock leaking at the tip, and he can’t deny the thought of it is enticing. “It’s okay, I liked it. Do it again”

And Sehun follows through, perfect boy he is, lifting his hands from his ass and when it comes down, Minseok hears the smack before he feels it. Sehun’s hands hot as they strike his ass, and Minseok cries out when Sehun rams into him from below, a single thrust in time with his hands that shatters him.

Sehun slaps him again, and again, and Minseok can’t stop fucking himself, hammering down and pounding, and it barely takes anything. Both of Sehun’s hands come down and smack either of his cheeks as he drives up  _ hard,  _ cramming Minseok so full of his cock, and that’s it. Minseok gasps, cries, stilling on his cock and his hands balled up in Sehun’s hair as the heat  _ snaps _ and he’s coming, white pearl liquid shooting out of his cock and absolutely ruining his sweater, their bellies. 

_ Fuck,  _ Minseok swears in his head, breathless and panting as he loses his words,  _ fuck, I didn’t even touch myself.  _

“Are you okay?” Sehun asks him, and Minseok slumps against him a little, body giving up for a moment as he leans against him. Sehun holds him, running his hands up and down his back, staying still as Minseok curls up into him, hiding his face in his neck and taking a minute to catch his breath. 

“Hold on, baby,” he murmurs, sitting up again, and he’s sensitive all over, but his eyes are dark still, face red, and he rolls his hips once, Sehun’s cock feeling even bigger now inside him.

Sehun moans, fingers balling up the back of Minseok’s sweater, and Minseok can feel his thighs shaking beneath him, his whole body vibrating. He rides, a little slower, but it doesn’t stop feeling good, the way he rocks on his cock, his length so deep inside him, the way Sehun looks at him, dazed and drooling a little, feeling so good. 

Minseok made him feel good, and it’s a little privilege. 

He pumps his hips harder, grinding down on Sehun’s cock, and Sehun bites. Thrusts up, burying himself into his ass and Minseok moans as he’s thoroughly fucked, and they’re both covered in sweat, sticky and wet and Minseok can’t get enough. Feels filthy and  _ loves it.  _

“Come for me, baby boy,” Minseok says, really a murmur against Sehun’s ear, and he wails so prettily, pulling harder on the sweater as he fucks Minseok without abandon, and Minseok.  _ Takes it,  _ closes his eyes and lets himself be fucked for all it’s worth, thighs locking around Sehun’s hips and he clenches around him, and it’s a cascade. 

A shout is wrenched from Sehun’s lips, loud, guttural as he pulls on his sweater with a force that’s audible, pulling it down and apart and into pieces as he comes hard into the condom, spilling and spilling and crying. 

“It’s okay, breathe,” Minseok murmurs, holding him, brushing his hair and kissing his cheek. His own chest still shakes, his bottom sensitive and he’s drenched in sweat and come, but he pays no mind to it all, letting Sehun curl up around him, calming himself down in his warmth.

“Min, Minnie,” Sehun whimpers, sounding completely fucked out and exhausted and barely hanging on, but he clings to Minseok fiercely, arms around him and leaning into him, barely able to bring his head up from where it’s buried in Minseok’s neck. 

“You okay?” Minseok asks him, and Sehun nods blearily, never lifting his head. 

“Tired. Sexed out,” he murmurs. Moves his head down further, plants his face in Minseok’s cleavage just peeking from the collar of his sweater, making Minseok squirm, but he doesn’t move. “My dick, fuck. It’s never been so spent.”

“Sorry,” Minseok offers, but Sehun tilts his head up to look at him, eyes narrowed.

“So you not only have magic dick powers, you have magic ass powers too,” Sehun says, sniffing, pulling even closer. He whines, says, “Fuck, I’m such a slut for you, cockslut, ass slut. Just a slut for you, I’m done for.”

Minseok chuckles, wiping the sweat off Sehun’s forehead, under his eyes with the cuffs of his sleeves, and that’s when he notices the sweater hangs off his elbows when he moves, much too loose. He blinks at all the fabric coming down to his waist, says, “Hunnie. What did you do to my sweater?”

Sehun blinks up at him, and Minseok feels his hands on his bare back, fingers feeling up his spine where there should be fabric instead, and he realizes. 

“Oh, oh  _ no,”  _ Sehun says, and they both look down, and Minseok’s Depression Sweater is pretty much dead, ripped down most of the back, barely held together by the hem. 

Minseok stares at his sweater, and it was already in a poor state from the frequency of him wearing it, never taking it off, crying in it, especially these past few months, but. It’s completely unsalvageable, but he doesn’t feel a particular sense of loss. 

It feels, maybe, even like a small relief. 

“I, Minseok, I’m sorry,” he says remorsefully, his cheeks adorably pink, and he’s embarrassed enough that he hides his face in his chest, his next words coming out muffled. “It felt too good, I’m sorry. I,  _ ah,  _ I feel bad.”

“Don’t,” Minseok tells him. Cups his face in his hands, makes him look up at him, and he smiles warmly for him. “Depending on it so much, it. It really wasn’t healthy. You did me a favor.”

He doesn’t look convinced, so Minseok adds, “And really, you were just doing what Junmyeon told you to do. He’ll be glad to see me out of it.”

Sehun pouts, but he does look less troubled. He sighs, puckering his lips like his baby, and Minseok chuckles, kissing him as silently requested, and while his head, his heart are still aching slightly, the papers Soeun wants him to sign sitting heavily on the nightstand table, he is, in the very least, comforted, not alone, by a beautiful boy who deserves much more.

He removes the remains of the sweater, shreds of fabric, Sehun helping him gather it and pulling it off over his head, and he sits up, lifts off of his cock. Minseok winces as he goes, the heaviness and stretch getting uncomfortable, and Sehun starts, holding his waist and trying to help him.

“Wait, Minnie, don’t go too quickly,” he says, and Minseok smiles at him.

“I have it, I’m alright,” he says, getting up off of his dick, wincing slightly as he’s emptied, and he’s filthy, gross all over, and his whole body pinks up, feeling very naked then. Sehun’s seen so much of him today, so much of his weak side, maybe his true side, and it leaves him feeling vulnerable. He tries brushing it off, getting on his knees on the mattress to get to the other side table, where he knows Junmyeon keeps tissues and wet wipes to clean himself up, when there’s something soft brushing, wiping his bottom. 

He jumps a little, looks back, and Sehun is kneeling by the edge of the bed, the black scraps of his sweater in his hands, balled up and cleaning his bottom gently, and an even gentler look on his face as he cleans Minseok up, careful sweeps of the cloth against his skin, hit other hand warm, set on Minseok’s hip.

Minseok stares at him, feels himself blush even more. “It’s, it’s okay, Hunnie. I can clean myself up, baby-”

“I may be your baby, your cock and come slut,” he says honestly, frankly as he wipes him down, but his face is so tender, as his eyes meet Minseok’s and he gives him a little smile, understanding. “But I can take care of you too, if you’ll let me.”

He says it carefully, words warm as he swipes the fabric gently around his hole, in his inner thighs. His hands are warm, and Minseok blushes, not used to being taken care of, but he raises his ass up a little when Sehun guides him. Sehun gets on the bed, cleans his behind, and presses his lips to the dimples on the bottom of Minseok’s spine, making him shiver.

“Are you uncomfortable?” Sehun asks him, hands careful on Minseok’s hips as he turns him over to clean his come splattered front, using the clean side of the fabric and his touch even softer. 

Minseok shakes his head, not knowing how to word himself properly. It doesn’t feel bad, certainly, and if just between the two of them, he says in a quiet voice, “I like it. It’s been some time, since someone had taken care of me like this. It’s just. I’m not used to it. I like being able to stand on my own.”

Sehun looks at him from where he hovers over his belly. He smiles, and his eyes glint, but it’s warm. “I get you. And I like it, that you do. But, you know, even for something as small as this, you don’t need to be so burdened on your own.”

It holds a lot of weight, and Minseok’ chest goes tight, his face pinks, and his eyes sting. He lays still, as comfortably as he thinks he can, as Sehun cleans him up, and when he’s finished, he blankets his lower body with his own, kissing his chest and nosing his skin, humming. Minseok looks down at him, watching as he licks over his skin, lips soft as they take his nipple into his mouth and traces it over with his tongue, relentless but soft. 

He blushes again, feeling so much younger than he is, shy, but he feels. Good, so good, and wanted, and maybe more than anything, looked after. Sehun crawls over him, brackets Minseok’s body between his thighs, and he leans down to kiss him, steaming, their lips like silk together, and Minseok decides to just take it in as it is, one thing at a time, letting himself feel a little more whole.

It’s then that Sehun’s phone rings, and they remember, “Oh, the delivery,” Sehun blinks, and he stands to answer his phone, words rushing out as he struggles to get his pants and jacket on. 

“Wait, Hunnie, I’ll pay for it,” Minseok says, trying to sit up, but Sehun gets himself over him again, dropping his phone to the bed after he says a hurried goodbye, and more or less tackles him to stay comfortable, making out with him briefly.

“I got this,” he says, voice low and maybe coming out in a bit of a growl, and Minseok looks at him, his belly warm again, but Sehun smirks at him, and stands, goes out the door to get their food.

Minseok watches him go, and. His blood rushes to his cheeks, and he closes his eyes, trying to calm his heart.

It’s been so long, too long. He didn’t even know he could feel this way again, that someone would look at him the way Sehun does. 

And. Make him even feel other things he’s never felt before. He didn’t know he had the capacity to feel something new.

Minseok sits up when Sehun comes back to the room, shutting the door behind him and ladened with paper bags of noodles and dumplings and pickled radishes and such, beaming like bright sunshine.

“Wait, we can’t eat in here, Junmyeon will have my head,” he says as Sehun starts bringing out the containers and chopsticks, laying them out on the carpet, at least attempting to keep the bed clean, but still. 

“I was told to get you fed, even just a little, by any means necessary,” he says, leaning over to kiss Minseok’s cheek sweetly. “So, really. I’m just following  _ his  _ orders.”

“Brat,” Minseok sighs, but doesn’t refute him further, curling in on himself as he watches Sehun uncap the tupperwares, setting everything for them. He’d even gotten some cider, and a beer for them each.

He’s too sweet, too good for him. Minseok’s chest warms with things he feels he’s not allowed to have, so he keeps himself quiet, even though. The little bit of happiness, contentment, feels nice. 

“Minseok?” Sehun says then, and Minseok realizes he had paused from where he had been laying out the food, just looking at him. “You okay?”

“Hmm?” he says, blinking, and he realizes he’d been rubbing his arms, hands on his shoulders and curling in on himself. “Ah. Um, it’s just cold. And, I feel a little naked, being honest. I’m not used to it.”

“But we’ve been naked together, you don’t need to be,” Sehun says frankly, and to prove his point, he even strips himself of his jacket and pants, and he’s too casual with his nudity, but Minseok can’t blame him. Sehun is tall, lean, broad, and has nothing to be shy about. 

“That was because we were fucking, but now that we’re about to eat. It’s a little strange,” he says instead, and Sehun keeps his gaze on him, tilting his head. “It’s nothing. I’ll just get a shirt-”

Before he can even get up to fetch one, or even finish his sentence, Sehun is throwing his own shirt to him, and Minseok catches it, staring at him, then at it. It looks expensive, feels expensive, soft and probably 100% silk, with how smooth it is on his skin, and Minseok blushes.

“Wait, this is yours-”

“Yeah,” Sehun says, going back to the food. “I mean. To me, you shouldn’t be shy. You’re really pretty, and nicely built and muscular and. Well, you’re beautiful.”

Minseok doesn’t miss the pink of his cheeks, looking down hard at where he’s mixing the black bean sauce with the noodles intently. It’s surprising, because Sehun is  _ always  _ confident, always sure with his words. He’s always flirty, always praising Minseok and how much he likes his cock, and now his ass as well, but. Right now, he speaks a little more honestly, a little more heartfelt, a whole other side of him, and Minseok finds himself endeared, and touched.

“But, if you feel a little weird, then you can wear my shirt. I use it sometimes when I sleep, it’s really soft,” he says, “and. Um, since you don’t have your sweater anymore because of me, this should be yours.”

Minseok startles, “Oh, no, Hunnie, that sweater was really old, you don’t have to-”

“Well, being honest, thinking about you having something of mine,” Sehun says, pondering over it. His cheeks are red when he says, “If you wear it when you want to be comforted, but in a light way, not like that sweater. It’s kind of cool, and an honor, that I could help. And, um, it’s super sexy, and. Uh, yes.”

He blushes again, and goes back to the noodles, and Minseok looks at him, a little dumbfounded. And, really, he’s touched, his heart warm, eyes slightly wet as he takes in his words, the shirt in his hands offered to him, and the weight it brings. That Sehun would want him to feel that way, comforted and strengthened, it’s pure, and Minseok just feels, not for the first time, so appreciative and grateful for having him here, in his like in any capacity, especially now. 

He puts it on, and it’s soft as he’d expected, light and silky on his skin, like the lightest touch, and he feels more covered, but also warmed, protected like an embrace. He blushes, feeling a little ridiculous for all the thoughts he’s having, being so thankful and even  _ happy,  _ and he catches the blush on Sehun’s face when he looks at him as he gets down from the bed to the carpet, tucking his feet under and pushing down the hem.

“Wait,” Sehun coughs, whole face red, and he leans towards him, and undoes a few buttons at the top, so Minseok’s chest is revealed. “There, better.”

“For you,” Minseok sighs, but he doesn’t button them up again, and picks up his chopsticks, and brings a dumpling up to his mouth. He chews slowly, and he hasn’t really eaten much these past few days, and he’s not hungry, but he knows getting something in his stomach is important, even if it’s just a small amount. 

They eat together, sharing bites, feeding each other more or less, and for Minseok and Soeun, it had been a long time, maybe years, since they’d fed each other sweetly. Or even had a meal together, really.

But, honestly. He does not think of her at all. Not when Sehun whines for more radishes from his share, trying to deftly take some from Minseok’s side, or when he offers a nice twirl of noodles thick with sauce and meat and onions to Minseok with his own chopsticks, or when he does anything, really. 

It’s another relief, another thing to be thankful for, another thing to be happy about.

They clean up together, and Sehun throws everything, letting Minseok get back into the bed properly, tucking himself in under the covers as Sehun comes back into the room, quietly closing the door behind him. 

He smiles when he sees Minseok in the bed, finally, and he reaches down to pick up his clothes, and he’s about to put on his underwear when Minseok asks him, “What are you doing?”

“I’m. Getting dressed?” he says, almost like a question instead of an answer, paused from where he’s hunched over, about to put his feet through his underwear. 

Minseok looks at him, asks him, “Why?”

Sehun looks at him, eyes wide and blinking, before he carefully replies, “Because I can’t be naked when I go down to my car? I mean, I  _ could,  _ but I don’t think the guards would like that.” Minseok watches him, and he thinks quietly. And, it doesn’t take much, to realize and admit to himself that he doesn’t want to be alone. And, even more than that, he doesn’t want Sehun to go away, not now, maybe. Maybe even not ever. 

So, he says, a little quietly, “Do you need clothes to sleep here with me?”

Sehun stares at him, blinking again, and his cheeks pink and a beautiful, bright smile spreads on his face, and he throws all his clothes behind him, turns off the light switch, and gets up on the bed, crawling to where Minseok is. 

“No, I don’t,” he answers, smiling, looking so happy and pleased. “To be honest, I was just waiting for you to let me stay. I’ve been wanting to get my arms around you and  _ cuddle  _ the fuck out of you.”

“What makes you think I’m a little spoon?” Minseok says, cocking an eyebrow at him, but Sehun doesn’t miss a beat, getting under the covers and turning to his side so Minseok’s chest covers his back, pushing back, unsatisfied until all of Minseok’s body is flush to his. 

“Bold of you to assume I’m not a little spoon,” Sehun says, sounding a little too happy as he takes Minseok’s arms and wraps it around himself, curling in comfortably. 

Minseok blinks, much warmer now, Sehun all wrapped up in him, and he feels his own cheeks tint, happy now, too. He leans down, kisses the back of Sehun’s neck, says quietly, “Thank you, Hunnie.”

Sehun hums, and Minseok feels him take his hand where he’s left it over Sehun’s belly, and he links their fingers together, getting closer. Minseok suddenly remembers, then, that they’ve never really spent the night together just to sleep, but. It doesn’t feel foreign, or strange, and he holds him.

“Do you feel better?” Sehun asks him, voice warm, and Minseok’s chest lightens at his tone. It feels like a hug, and it makes him tug Sehun a little closer, burrowing his face in his neck. 

“Yeah, I do,” he says honestly. There is still some heaviness in his heart, and the urge to cry isn’t completely gone, but the silk of Sehun’s shirt on his skin, and the way Sehun lets himself be embraced and gives him so much comfort just by being here. He feels more calm, much better than he had in a while. 

“Good,” Sehun says, get even more comfortable and already mostly asleep. “That’s all that matters.”

The way he says it, Minseok almost believes it. 

.

When Minseok wakes, the sun is soft and filtered through the curtains, and he can’t move.

He looks down, blinking sleepily, and Sehun is curled up around him, and for as tall and broad as he is, he’s curled up in Minseok’s arms, looking so soft and cuddling him like a baby. 

His legs are entangled with his, arms tightly wrapped around Minseok’s middle, and his head is on his chest, using it as a pillow, and Minseok smiles, a little amused. 

He brushes his hair back from his face, his skin particularly warm where Sehun’s cheek is pillowed on his best, and he skates his other hand down his back, over his shoulders, and Sehun whines at him, writhing a little. 

He chuckles, and it’s not long after that Sehun wakes up, blinking and shuffling around a little, pressing his whole face onto Minseok’s chest, groaning and grunting gruffly.

“There’s a whole pillow there for you to use,” Minseok tells him. Sehun ignores him, not lifting his head from where it’s using his chest as a pillow. “I think it would be more comfortable for you.”

“No,” Sehun grunts, muffled. “Titty.”

Minseok chuckles, blushes at the suddenness of it. “What?”

“Titty,” Sehun answers, burrowing in a little more and moving his head slightly to Minseok’s cleavage, nosing his way into the shirt and keeping himself there. 

“‘Titty?’ You mean my chest?” he says, and he laughs again, a little embarrassed, and it’s been some time, since he’s had a morning this light. 

“Not chest. I mean your  _ tits,”  _ he says, and his breath is hot, grounding against Minseok’s skin. “There’s a difference.”

“Well, what are you doing with them?” he asks, amusing him.

“Pillow,” is all Sehun says, and Minseok tsks, brushing back his hair, tickled by his breath and squirming a little as Sehun snuggles closer.

“But there’s a pillow right here.”

“No,” Sehun whines, holding on tighter and burrowing in deeper, so almost half his face is inside the shirt, “It’s, they’re so big, like pillows. Hard pillows.”

“It can’t be comfortable,” Minseok says, but Sehun shakes his head, moving slightly to kiss over the meatiest parts of his chest, like he can’t get enough. 

“You know, when your shirt is too tight, which they almost always are, I see them stretching the shirt and they’re so  _ big  _ and pillowy and a dream,” Sehun says, waking up a little more and he starts rubbing his cheek against his chest. It tickles, a little, and no one has really quite paid so much attention to his chest this way. It’s a little confusing, but Minseok doesn’t hate it, lets Sehun nip a bit and just nose through. “Like, the first time I saw you, your button-up was too small and it just  _ popped out  _ and I haven’t forgotten it.”

“You’ve fantasized about my chest?” Minseok raises an eyebrow at him, and Sehun whines again, moving so he’s laying directly over him, face planted comfortably in the valley between. 

“I’m sorry,” he says, pouting, but he sighs comfortably as he pillows his face against the soft, hard rise of Minseok’s left pec. “It’s just, your titties are so  _ nice.  _ Really, every part of you is so nice.”

Minseok chuckles, feeling a little embarrassed. “Not every part.”

Sehun looks up at him, eyebrows furrowed, frown on his face. “Why do you keep bringing yourself down?”

Minseok doesn’t expect the question, but he answers quietly with an apologetic smile, “Force of habit.”

Sehun keeps looking at him, unblinking, mouth still set in a straight line, then he nestles his head back down, sighing against his chest. “I wish you wouldn’t.”

It’s quiet for a while, because Minseok doesn’t have anything to say to that. He’s a little choked, so he plays with Sehun’s hair, soft touches and warm, and Sehun hums, breathing even, gentle.

Then, in a little flash, Sehun is moving his chin, tracing an indiscernible line across Minseok’s chest, lips light and nose skimming his skin as he goes, until he’s right in the middle, the deepest part of the dip, and he’s licking a stripe down, tasting him, making Minseok squirm, gasp softly. He cups Sehun’s face, moaning as Sehun doesn’t let up, undoing the other buttons as he goes.

“Ah,  _ ah,”  _ he breathes, trying to keep things light and under control but he can’t help but scrunch Sehun’s hair in his fingers as he nips and nuzzles, thumbing over where his nipples are beneath the fabric. “Why do I feel like you’re about to motorboat me?”

Sehun’s head snaps up, eyes  _ shining  _ and his mouth agape, looking like the world had lit up just for him, “Will you let me do that?”

Minseok stares at him, knowing he’s completely serious. “I don’t think there’s anything there to motorboat.”

Sehun’s eyes narrow, and he lowers his face back down to his chest, looking like a man with a mission and licking his lips, “Give me thirty seconds, I’ll prove you wrong-”

“Min, I saw this near the trash and-”

Minseok pushes Sehun away from his tits frantically, and they both look up to see Junmyeon at the door, staring at them with wide eyes and cheeks red and the remains of his sweater from last night in his hands, that Sehun had put aside for the trash. 

Junmyeon looks at him, constantly blinking, and looking like he wants to look away from their general nakedness, but he can’t, frozen on the spot. 

Minseok feels his whole body heat up, so mortified and literally just moments away from being motorboated, or at least an attempt of it. Just as embarrassing. 

Sehun being Sehun breaks the silence, smiling at Junmyeon and even attempting to sit up a little, bit he never strays away from Minseok, saying, “Hi, I’m Sehun. I messaged you yesterday.”

Junmyeon turns his attention to him, and his cheeks flush even further. Minseok remembers all the bites and bruises he must have given Sehun last night being in full view now, and Sehun doesn’t seem to be making any attempt to hide them, and he momentarily wishes that his bed would eat him alive. 

“Ah, yes,” Junmyeon says, a little dazed, but he gives him a small smile, always so polite. “You took care of Minseok yesterday?”

“We took care of each other,” Sehun beams, and Minseok dies a little inside. 

“Hunnie, get off me,” he says, voice hushed as he tries to get Sehun off his lap. 

He stays put. Says brightly in reply, “Nope.”

Minseok can see the small smile on Junmyeon’s face as he watches them, and it’s not completely unpleasant, exactly. It’s just weird, having someone who isn’t afraid to be affectionate with him, even in front of someone else.

“Well, anyway, I saw this outside, and was just wondering. Is this your sweater, Min?” Junmyeon asks him, showing them the black fabric.

MInseok stares at him, feels his face pink up, already embarrassed at what he needs to tell him. “Well, yes. It is.”

“What happened to it?” Junmyeon asks him, and Minseok feels himself get even redder, not knowing how to word himself.

Sehun answers for him instead, saying too casually, “I destroyed it.”

“What?” Junmyeon blinks at him, and Sehun just shrugs, lays his head back on Minseok’s chest. 

“You told me to get him out of it, so I was just doing what you told me to do,” he says. 

“Oh,” Junmyeon blinks, looking confused, but smiles anyway. “Thank you, then.”

“Myeon, I wouldn’t touch it for any longer if I were you,” Minseok says in a rush, feeling like he wants the earth to swallow him whole.

“Why not?” 

No one says anything; Minseok can’t bring himself to speak, much less even to look at him, but Sehun just smiles, keeps his gaze as he cuddles with MInseok, curling up against his cleavage.

It takes a few moments before Junmyeon understands what the silence is implying, and as it sinks in, Minseok watches is expression darken, and he says darkly, “I’m burning that bed.”

“Better burn the carpet too, while you’re at it,” Sehun says, and Minseok slaps his chest.

“Min, are you serious?” Junmyeon almost screeches, dropping the sweater and shaking his hands, as if the residual dried come will somehow fly off.

“I’m sorry,” he says meekly, looking down to where Sehun beams at him, the  _ brat. _

Junmyeon sighs, but he says, resigned, “Well, since you did as I asked. Would you like to join us for breakfast? It’s pancake day today.”

_ “Ohhh, cake,”  _ Sehun says, eyes bright, and Minseok sighs, reels him back in when he sees him about to stand, saving Junmyeon from having to see him naked as the day he was born.

“We’ll be out soon,” he says for them both, and Junmyeon gives them one more look, before he smiles again, and leaves.

They go out after what feels like an hour, really only around ten minutes, of stupid bickering, trying to convince Sehun to dress decently, Sehun trying to convince him in turn to keep wearing his shirt, and  _ just his shirt,  _ and eventually, they come to an agreement. Sehun goes out in his pants, torso bare and the scratches Minseok had left on his back and teeth marks all over his shoulder exposed for the world to see, and Minseok wears the shirt Sehun had given him the night before, and a pair of shorts.

“Min, I hate to bother, but can you go fix the table?” Junmyeon asks him from where he’s in the small kitchen, cooking up and preparing a stack of pancakes for them.

“Junmyeon, I’ve literally been leeching off of you guys for months, it isn’t a bother at all,” he says, going over to the cabinets where they keep plates and utensils. 

Junmyeon looks like he wants to refute what he says, but Sehun comes up to him, bare chested little shit, and Junmyeon is blushing immediately. 

“How can I help?” he asks, smiling, and Junmyeon blinks repeatedly, trying not to stare at all the hickeys Minseok’s had left all over his skin.

“Ah, I’m alright. And don’t worry yourself, you’re our guest,” he says, waving him off, smiling with pink cheeks.

“Where’s Xing?” Minseok asks, having mercy on him and pulling Sehun away to help him with getting the glasses ready.

“Ah, he’s just out buying some syrup, he can’t have these without some,” Junmyeon says, and Minseok tries to listen, but Sehun, after placing the glasses and water on the table, comes back just to slink his arms around Minseok’s waist, set his chin on his shoulder, and hug him, swaying them from side to side. 

Minseok turns his head to look at him, and Sehun simply kisses him, right in the kitchen, right where Junmyeon stares at them, shocked despite the fact he saw them naked in bed just minutes earlier, only looking down when the pancake is in danger of being burnt. 

“Hunnie, you can’t do that here,” he says, blushing, but. He doesn’t hate it, as much as he tries to be a little more firm. He leans back against his chest, moving along with him easily and catching on to the tune he’s humming.

Minseok isn’t fooled, or under any guise that this had not begun as something purely physical, and maybe some comfort for himself in a time he’s particularly vulnerable. Sehun had been there, all too willing and offering, particularly perfect and he’d helped him forget, even just for a while.

But. The night before, and now, gives him a little hope. Something to look forward to, and allow himself to want.

“Ah, I’m back,” Yixing comes through the door, removing his shoes and grinning as he raises up a plastic full of food. “I got strawberries too, they looked so fresh, and - Sehunnie?”

Sehun looks up from where he’s been canoodling with Minseok, eyes wide when he sees Yixing. 

“Hyung!” he says, eyes wide and happy as he pulls away from Minseok to meet Yixing in a warm hug, laughing.

“Hyung?” Minseok blinks, watching as Yixing pulls away from the embrace, patting Sehun’s cheek.

“Sehun was one of my students last year, one of the best,” Yixing tells them. 

“Good, you have taste,” Sehun says, smiling, and Minseok watches them be playful, and he can’t help but smile a little, himself.

“Ah, I haven’t seen you in so long, Yunho and Hyukjae treating you well?” he asks, “You’re the one who’s helped Minseok all this time, then?”

“Well, I don’t know if I would call it ‘helped,’” he says, but doesn’t deny. Yixing just smiles wider. 

“Minseok, you picked a good one. He’s a good kid, really hard working and talented, kind as anything.”

Sehun smiles at Yixing, then at Minseok, smug and cute as he links his arms around Yixing’s shoulders, hanging off of him.

When they sit down and eat, it’s easy, the banter between the four of them light and conversation never dull as they eat. When Junmyeon brings up the sweater reproachfully, Yixing blinks, and shrugs, saying, “Well, considering everything, that’s a really good way to go.”

“Yixing,” Junmyeon stares at him, disapproving as he pops a strawberry into his mouth, a cute angry look.

“Well, look at their necks, and I’m sure Minseok wouldn’t wear some as expensive as  _ that  _ to bed so I’m pretty sure Sehun must have lent it to him,” he says, “It’s obvious they fucked.”

“Right in my home, too,” Junmyeon sighs, being dramatic. Minseok blushes, playing with the syrup sticking to his plate aimlessly, unable to look up at them, and Sehun just keeps eating, a little too cool for the situation. “I gave the guest room the best sheets too.”

“Well, at least it wasn’t in our bedroom,” Yixing says, much too casually. Junmyeon stares at him, and he continues, “I mean. It’s not like when we were in Min’s place that one time and his closet-“

“What? What about my closet?” Minseok blinks, watching as Junmyeon instantly turns pink and he slaps his hand over Yixing’s mouth, trying to get him to stop talking. 

“Nothing,” he says to Minseok, eyes wide, and he glares at Yixing. “You. Quiet, or it will be the sofa tonight.”

“Sorry, Myeonie,” he says, puckering his lips. Junmyeon glares at him for another moment, but he eventually sighs, leans in to kiss him. 

The ring on Yixing’s finger glints a little, and they’re around half a year away from getting married. And Minseok knows he shouldn’t compare, because he and Soeun has  _ so many  _ wonderful years together, happy and true. It’s just, he now realizes, the bad had outweighed the good, and it lead to mistakes on both their parts. As much as he was willing to work on it, for as long as he tried, there was only so much he could do if she didn’t want him anymore, if she had chosen to lie to him, hurt him in the way she had. He knows he’s not faultless, but. It was hard not to be sad. 

But, he knows. He’s  _ seen,  _ and he really believes, that Yixing and Junmyeon would make it. They worked and worked hard, and mostly, they never let their magic falter, hard as it might be sometimes. Maybe that’s the difference.

“Minnie,” Sehun prods, and Minseok internally shakes off his train of thought, looks to his right, where Sehun is watching him carefully. “You won’t finish your second piece? Why don’t you eat a little more?”

“I’m full,” he says, trying to appease him with a small smile, but Sehun doesn’t look convinced. “And I had a lot of fruit.”

“I haven’t seen you eat in a week, this is progress,” Junmyeon says, looking at them. 

Sehun doesn’t look completely content, so he cuts a bit from his own plate, his fourth, from his plate. It’s a small bite, barely a small morsel, and he stabs it with his fork, bringing it up to Minseok’s mouth, saying, “Just one more bite? I promise it’s good.”

Minseok looks at it reluctantly, really feeling not hungry though his stomach is still relatively empty, and he looks at Sehun, says, “What did you pour over it?”

“It’s milk and sugar, my mom eats it this way, it’s yummy,” he says, waving his fork a little, “Please? It’s magic, trust me.”

He doesn’t move away, offering it still, and Minseok sighs, and acquiesces. He opens his mouth, and takes the bite Sehun prepared for him, not seeing the way Yixing and Junmyeon look at each other, and at them, relieved, and happy for him.

“Ah,” he says, chewing and swallowing and pinking up a little, because. It  _ is  _ quite good. 

Sehun smiles, somewhat smug, but mostly happy, pushing his plate nearer to Minseok so he can get a little more, and they end up finishing the whole pancake together.

“The delivery trash from last night,” Junmyeon says, catching their attention, “Was that the two of you ? Did you eat?”

“He ate too little,” Sehun says, pouting up at Minseok. 

“It’s still something,” Yixing says, looking at them. “He really hasn’t been eating at all and we were really worried. Thank you, Hunnie.” 

And, Minseok hadn't even realized how  _ worried  _ they had been. He feels bad, but also, he feels grateful, that there are people who look out for him as much as Junmyeon and Yixing, and now Sehun, do. 

“Ah, it’s nothing,” Sehun says, grinning. “Just some post-sex sustenance-”

Minseok promptly puts his hand over Sehun’s mouth, ignoring the way he licks his palm, willing himself to be unphased. “That’s enough, Hunnie.”

“Well, are you going to work today?” Junmyeon asks him, and they both look at him. Eventually, Minseok feels Sehun turning to look at him too, and he squirms a little in his seat. 

“Ah. I don’t think so. I told Chanyeol I’d be out until today,” he answers.

“So what are you going to do?”

“I don’t know,” he says honestly. In the very least, staying in bed and being stagnant isn’t the plan.

“Why don’t you come with me?” Sehun says. The three of them turn to him, and he explains, “We’re rehearsing today, and it’s a good one. And you should meet Nini.”

“Oh, I haven’t seen Jongin in some time, too,” Yixing says, “I’ve been meaning to visit one of your practices, Yunho won’t shut up about how hard it is, I’ll drop by too after I drop Myeon off at his department.”

“I. Ah, I mean, alright,” Minseok says, when everyone looks at him and waiting for his answer. He doesn’t know if he’s ready to face a lot of people today, but Sehun is leaning forward, kissing his shoulder, and Minseok finds himself breathing a little easier, a little more hopeful.

.

Sehun holds Minseok’s hand in the car, in the elevator of his building, in his apartment as he looks for appropriate clothes to practice in, and in the halls of his university as they make their way to the rehearsal space. His hand is warm, unfaltering, and Minseok finds it difficult whenever he has to let go. He’s not used to it, the easy, gentle touch; he and his wife weren’t very particular about holding hands, showing their affection in other ways. But he’s not hating it, though he’s blushing more than he thought he would, finds himself linking their fingers together.

“Minnie,” Sehun eventually steers a tall, beautiful boy with plush lips and kind eyes to where Minseok stands near the bleachers on the side, “This is Kim Jongin. Nini, I want to introduce you to Kim Minseok”

Jongin blinks, and his eyes wide, and he stares at Sehun, “Minseok? You mean-”

“Perfect man with the cute smile and the cock from heaven, yes.” Sehun nods, and Jongin freezes.

“That’s not what I was going to say,” Jongin says to Minseok, cheeks dusted pink.

“It’s alright, it’s a compliment,” Minseok says, smiling, and Sehun, shameless brat, says, “Please, that was the toned down version of what I wanted to say.”

“So you talk about me with your friends?” Minseok asks him, and Sehun freezes, face flooding with red, and Jongin looks between them, holding back his laugh. “I’m honored.”

“I mean, how could I  _ not,”  _ Sehun says, trying to stay haughty and confident, but. “You know how to get me crying with dick, it should be bragged about. And your smile is cute, it’s just a fact.”

“Thank you,” he says, smiling warmly, his chest light. Sehun blushes, but his facade breaks. He whines, leaving Jongin’s side and pulling at Minseok’s coat with his hands, pouting. Minseok is endeared, chuckling and he touches his chin, makes him bow a little, but he doesn’t give Sehun the kiss he wants, instead just settles for pinching his cheeks.

He, after all, is still at least ten years older than anyone in the room, aside from the instructor.

Sehun leans back, eyes wide and cheeks red, and Jongin looks amused, pulling him away and bowing to Minseok, excusing them so they can warm up. 

Even just the warm up itself is artful, from where Minseok watches everything happening on his seat on the highest row of the bleachers. Jongin and Sehun move so smoothly, languidly, stretching their limbs and getting their bodies ready for the next few hours.

They begin running through just as Yixing makes his way inside, taking a seat next to Minseok. As a whole, their company moves as one, a collective flow of movement that is fascinating and beautiful, but Minseok being Minseok, he only watches Sehun. Watches as he lets himself move and dance and his attention to the details, the smallest curl of his fingers and tilt of his head setting him apart, above everyone else. He dances wonderfully, purely, his long legs made for the motions, powerful but restrained, and his arms, reaching high and his hips, easy in movement and tempting.

Minseok remembers that Sehun’s father had wanted his son following him, into becoming a lawyer. Vehemently disapproved of his dancing, and effectively cut him out, refusing to see him, refusing to watch the labors of his hard work. 

The thoughts make Minseok despise the man even more. To not want to let Sehun pursue  _ this,  _ this amazing thing where he is most honest in expression, to not want to see him do so well. To ignore him. 

That man deserves nothing. 

“He’s good, isn’t he?” Yixing says, watching Sehun as well. “He works very hard. The last few years, he’s been working harder than he has before, he was already good to begin with, but he’s just improved incredibly. He and Jongin are the department’s best.”

“And I believe it,” Minseok says, watching them, the skill steps above the rest.

“He wants to do it for life,” Yixing says. 

“He should. It’s evident he loves it,” Minseok replies. 

During the five minute break their instructor calls for, Sehun doesn’t sit, rest, drink to rehydrate, or refresh himself. He goes to the bleachers, climbing over the risers to get to where Minseok is sitting, and he sits between Minseok’s legs on the row below, letting his feet dangle on the other side. Sets his elbows on either of Minseok’s knees, and cups his face in his own hands, smiling brightly, as if he hadn’t been dancing non-stop for almost an hour. 

“I’ll go see Yunho,” Yixing says, smiling serenely and taking his leave, and then it’s just the two of them. 

“Drink,” Minseok says, offering him a swig from his jug, and sighing when Sehun doesn’t take it, but opens his mouth instead. He concedes, and puts the lip to his mouth and tilts it so he drinks and takes in a few gulps. “Tired?”

“Nah, this is nothing,” Sehun says, adjusting a bit so he’s resting his head on Minseok’s thigh. He’s much too comfortable, but Minseok doesn’t push him away. Doesn’t want to overthink anymore, and just brushes back Sehun’s sweaty hair from his face. “You having fun?”

“You’re particularly enchanting to watch,” Minseok says. Sehun smiles at him, face beautifully pink, maybe from exertion, maybe from the nice words. 

Minseok likes him a lot. A lot, a lot. 

“How am I doing?” he asks, fluttering his lashes and beaming, so pretty. 

Minseok smiles. Tells him, “You’re doing well. Very much worth coming here if just to see you show maybe one of the most wonderful parts of you.”

Sehun  _ glows,  _ his whole demeanor brightening up, and it’s so stupidly, freeingly typical how Minseok feels his chest throb, his heart just thump, just a little bit harder, and he wants to kiss him, just a little. Maybe a lot. 

He tilts his head forward, looking at Sehun’s lips, so tempted. And then, he remembers where they are, in front of too many people, in the middle of what is essentially Sehun’s classroom. 

He shies away, pulling back and feeling his cheeks flush, but Sehun somehow knows what he wants, as he seems to always do. He leans up and forward and kisses him anyway, lips just wet from the hug and mouth soft as he presses against Minseok’s. And Minseok cannot help but melt in, let himself be kissed and kiss Sehun in return, pulling him in closer, closer, until he’s leaning down and Sehun has to crane his neck back for him, kiss deepened. 

Minseok will remember, later on, that this is the first time they have kissed in public, out in the open. And, it doesn’t matter that there may be some who will see, doesn’t matter what they think. Minseok finds himself being able to smile and be happy, wherever Sehun is, and he takes the small little bit of joy with him.

.

“Oh - Minseok!”

“Morning, Chanyeol,” Minseok greets as he makes his way to his office, already knowing he has a mountain of work to get through and not looking forward to it. He sighs as he sits down, preparing himself for the day, “Tell me what I’ve got going on today?”

“Ah, well, just got a lot of documents for you to go through, today,” he says, setting a coffee in front of him, “No meetings.”

“Ah, I hate paperwork,” he sighs, but he puts on his glasses anyway.

“I. I don’t want to be too nosy,” Chanyeol shuffles a little, “but, I wanted to ask. How are you?”

“Well, I think I’m okay,” Minseok says, sighing. “Tired, but the last few days have been better.”

“Sehun?”

“He’s been especially patient with me,” he says, wills himself not to get too pink. “And Kyungsoo’s been a godsend. He’s trying to renegotiate with Soeun and her lawyers now, so. I’m fine. Really. Thank you for staying on top of things, Yeollie.”

“Of course, Min,” he says, bows a little. “Um. As long as you’re okay. You are, right?”

“I’m okay,” Minseok smiles for him. It comes easy, unlike before. “Thank you Yeollie, you can go update Baek and Dae now,” he says, looking pointedly past the door, where they’re hanging and spying on him. He moves his chair a little so he’s in their full view, and he smiles again. “Thank you. I’m fine. Don’t worry so much and get back to work.”

They jump when they’re addressed, and say, “Right, good having you back, Min,” “We weren’t  _ worried,  _ please,” as they walk over each other, making to leave.

Chanyeol nods, blushing and bowing again and saying before leaving, “If you need anything, I’ll be out here.”

It’s an uneventful morning, even by the job’s standards. He reads through pages upon pages of papers, types up even more, and by the time lunch comes around, the words and lines are blurring and even when he closes his eyes, all he sees is black and white print lines, each word meaning less than the last.

His reprieve comes in the form of Sehun sending him a text,  _ ‘I’m outside your building, let’s have meat.’  _ He doesn’t specify whether he means it in a food context, or a sexual context, but Minseok is tired and dazed enough that he doesn’t care which he’s pertaining to, they are both preferable to more work.

As it turns out, he ‘meat’ is in the form of an all-you-can-eat barbecue place, where Sehun swears by the side dishes. He’s not wrong, the baby potatoes are tender and sweet and the bean sprouts are seasoned well, but more than that, Sehun’s warm, soft presence sitting next to Minseok as he grills the meat over the covered coals sets Minseok’s heart at ease, enough to make him smile, content.

“Minnie, try this,” he says, eyes smiling as he offers up meat and, something, Minseok can’t distinguish, wrapped up in lettuce, held delicately in his hand, and Minseok sighs, opens his mouth diligently for him to push it in. 

He makes a face as he chews, and glares. Sehun is laughing loudly, offering him kimchi on chopsticks to cover up the taste of the little pineapple slice with the meat and spicy chilli bean sauce and several other things Minseok wants to spit out.

Lunch is fun, happy, just theirs. Sehun whines a lot about being tired from practicing all the time, but bursts with pride when he talks about how much more flexible he’s become and how the number is so interesting and challenging, and Minseok listens, each word coming from his mouth a small treasure, a balm. 

He still has a mountain of work to go through, and his problems don’t seem to diminish, but, being with Sehun, having him lean his head against his shoulder and moaning about how full of food he is and how he can’t move, it reminds him of how happy he can really be, in the small moments.

“I could have paid for mine,” Sehun tells him as they’re making their way back to Minseok’s building, pouting behind the scarf he has wrapped around his neck. 

“You paid for the delivery, it’s my turn to pay,” Minseok says, guiding Sehun away from the bulk of the street traffic with a hand on his back. They’re just a bit away from the building, and Minseok doesn’t want to go back, just yet, if at all. 

“Ah. I hate this place,” Sehun says, staring up at the office, eyebrows furrowed and frowning. “You’re a saint, putting up with everything there.”

“I work with a lot of good people,” he says, and it’s true. Baekhyun, Jongdae, Chanyeol, and most of the other partners and associates and a lot of the board have been kind to him, offered him support. But, he can’t ignore that the atmosphere has changed, a lot, in the months following Sehun’s father’s scandal with Minseok’s wife. It’s gotten to a point of being suffocating, almost. Minseok is just trying to find ways to breathe. But, he says, “Things will be okay. I’m taking things slowly.”

Sehun looks at him, and they’re right outside the main entrance, just waiting, not willing to part yet. “I’ll be here, you know. For you? If you want someone to talk to, or. Or just sit with. It must be hard, in there.”

He’s blushing, usually so smooth and shameless and a brat and going for what he wants, but now, staring at his feet, being honest and baring his heart a little. Minseok likes him every way, and he smiles, leans in to kiss Sehun simply. 

“Thank you, baby,” he says quietly, watching as Sehun’s face get even redder at the short kiss, the term of endearment. His ears betray his happiness. “I’ll be going in now, have a good day.”

Sehun smiles, and leans down to press another kiss to Minseok’s mouth, just as short, maybe even a little sweeter. Minseok is the one who turns red, this time.

After that short hour with Sehun, nothing much can deter his good mood. Even the piles of papers he needs to go through is taken care of in no time, just one page after another, and they’re done. 

“Oh, done for the day, Min?” Chanyeol says as Minseok comes out of his office. 

“Yeah, Yixing is making hotpot, don’t want to be late for it,” he says, “You should come, Junmyeon told me to tell you to come by, he misses you.”

“Ah, well, I have a gig later tonight, can I leave early? I don’t want to be rude,” Chanyeol says, and Minseok waves it off. 

“No, it’ll be good,” Minseok says, standing by his desk. “I’ll give you a ride.”

“Ah, no, you don’t have to-“

“It’s no trouble, go ahead and pack. Take your time, it’s been a while since we’ve had a meal together,” Minseok says, smiles at him. It takes a while, but Chanyeol eventually gives, cheeks rosy at the thought of seeing Junmyeon and Yixing, and even rosier at the prospect of lots of meat and soup. 

Minseok is in a good mood, so he’s only a little bothered when someone is saying, “Oh, Minseok. Finally got to work today, did you?”

He sighs, Chanyeol’s eyes wide as his stare darts between Sehun’s father and Minseok. But Minseok was raised to be polite and respectful, even though the man doesn’t deserve any of it, and he says, “Yes. I’ve managed to catch up with my work, you don’t need to worry.”

“Why were you even on leave?” he asks, standing prouder than he really is. Minseok isn’t phased. WIll no longer allow this man to rule his life from a distance.

He is capable of being happy, of moving forward, as the past few days have shown him. 

“I was ill, sir.”

“So you’re better now?”

“Much better,” he even smiles a little, but Minseok’s eyes stay cold.

It irks him, and Minseok knows it, but he pays him no mind, turning back to Chanyeol, smiling, saying, “Almost done?”

“I heard from the staff downstairs that they saw my son with you earlier today,” he says, tone loud, and Minseok can hear the activity pause all around them, watching what he would do. 

He says nothing, and it just makes him talk even more, trying to provoke him. “Ah, I can only imagine what you two were doing, hmm? I don’t know if Sehun should hang around the likes of you, weak, unable to satisfy your partner so she had to look for a real man. But what would I know? I haven’t seen him much, these days.”

“Min?” Chanyeol blinks at him, and Minseok doesn’t say anything still. He won’t bite. 

He says more shit, but truthfully, Minseok had stopped listening. It still stings. He can’t deny, the words barbed and meant to hurt, and truthfully, the thought of them together, of her going to him, still hurts, makes him sad. 

But, that’s as far as he lets it go. He won’t allow himself to get too affected, because he knows now more than ever that this man just wasn’t worth getting into a fight with. 

He’s just an angry man, who didn’t deserve the treasures he had. Not the son he has in Sehun, not the fiancée he has in Soeun, not the success of the firm and the good people who work for it, despite his lack of character. 

And, what Minseok and Sehun do in their time isn’t his business. Minseok will not allow him to take their little happiness. 

So, he puts on a small smile, turns to face him properly, and says, “Is that all, sir?”

Everyone is quiet for many moments. Gradually, Minseok watches Mr. Oh complexion increase in redness, in anger. He admits easily that it’s a little satisfying. 

“What?” he shouts. 

“Are you done?” he asks, and he’s surprised himself, at how calm he is. He smiles, “Please contact me if you have something to say of true substance. I’ll be going now. Come on, Chanyeol.”

“Ah, yes,” Chanyeol says, scrambling up after him. Before they get to the elevators, Minseok sees Baekhyun, Jongdae both grinning at him, thumbs up discrete, and he smiles at them in return. 

Dinner tastes even better, that night. 

.

It’s a few days, before he gets to see Sehun again. 

It’s on a Thursday evening, when they get dinner out together, and Sehun invites him back to his apartment for a nightcap,  _ “And maybe a blowjob!” _

Minseok nixes the blowjob idea, as much as it pains him, too tired from the day. But, they do have a nightcap of wine in his living room, and he’s thankful he’d thought of taking the train, today. 

Sehun curls around him as they drink, tangling his legs with Minseok’s and leaning against him as they talk, easy, pleasant. 

“So he really gave you  _ even more  _ work because he was pissed?” Sehun asks, and Minseok sighs, taking a long swig of wine. Enough that he leans down to refill his glass. “He’s hella unprofessional.”

“You’re telling me,” Minseok says, letting Sehun play with his hair. 

“Have you thought of leaving?” Sehun asks him, voice soft. 

“I have,” Minseok says honestly. “Not just the firm, but. This side of the profession. If this is how people with success and ambition turn out to be, then. I’m not interested.”

“And what were you planning to do after?” he asks, patient. 

It takes him a moment, before he answers, “I don’t know for sure, being honest. I thought of maybe leaving corporate, working with a smaller company that focuses on really helping people who actually need it, and not just the rich.”

“That would be good,” Sehun encourages him, and Minseok smiles,

Knowing he would. “You know anyone?”

“I do, some people I used to know,” he says. “But it’s all very early, and. I don’t know, I think I want to rest first. See my parents. It’s been a long time.”

Sehun looks at him for a long time, and he says eventually, “I don’t understand something.”

“And what is that?”

“How did someone  _ like you,”  _ he starts, “end up working for the personification of an asshat?”

“That’s your dad, Hunnie.”

“Makes me mean it even more,” he says haughtily, and Minseok laughs, setting his hand on Sehun’s thigh, holding him. 

“Well, truthfully,” he begins to say, “When I started out as a young lawyer, I wanted to do my best. And, whether we like it or not, he  _ is  _ the best at what he does.”

“Take that back,” Sehun says, and Minseok chuckles, apologizing with a kiss to the corner of his mouth. 

“It’s true, you know it is,” he says. “Because as much as I  _ despise  _ him and the ground he walks on, I can still respect his skill enough.”

Sehun huffs, taking a long pull from his glass. He makes Minseok tuck him into his arms, and he says, “He’s the worst.”

He burrows a little, until he’s curled up into a ball and his head is tucked into Minseok’s neck, and Minseok sits with him, brushing his hair back. Asks him, “What about you? Why do you hate your father?”

Sehun hums. Waits until Minseok takes his offered hand to hold and links their fingers together, before he sighs. Says, “Exactly for the reason you respect him.”

He pauses, takes another swig, and Minseok waits. “He was so good at his job and he got so obsessed with money and power, and he. He essentially left us.”

He pauses again, and Sehun, from what he has shown Minseok, doesn’t quite have a weak side. And he doesn’t mourn the loss of his relationship with his father, this much is evident in his face. But, he looks resigned to it, somewhat angry, and mostly, tired. 

“And, when my mom left him, when I went with her, he. He didn’t give a shit,” Sehun tells him. “And you know, I really couldn’t give less of a shit, if he cares about me or whatever. We’ve been apart for so long and he had no hand in raising me, so I don’t care. But, still. When your own dad kind of dismisses you from his life, it still hurts.”

He goes quiet after, and Minseok holds him. Hearing him say it all, becoming more open with him, it really takes a lot, and Minseok knows it, wants him to know that he understands. 

So, he pulls him in, holds him tighter, and presses his lips to Sehun’s forehead. 

After some time, Sehun says a little meekly, “I’m sorry for dumping on you.”

“It’s okay,” Minseok says, “you don’t need to apologize. I dumped on you first. Are you okay?”

“Yeah,” he says, and he closes his eyes. “A lil sleepy.”

“Hmm,” Minseok says, realizing just how much Sehun must have drank. He takes the mostly empty glass from his loose grip before it falls, and sets it down along with his, doing his best not to jostle Sehun too much and disturb him. 

He sits, and Sehun is warm, gangly and poised with his long limbs, but right now, especially now, Minseok sees how young he is. Has so much to experience, the world really there for him to take, whether or not his father is present in his life. 

Not for the first time, he looks down, counts the eyelashes fanning Sehun’s cheeks, and thinks about how much he likes him. How much he wants for him. 

“Minnie?” Sehun says sleepily, a little tipsy, and Minseok hums to show that he’s listening. “I have a favor to ask of you. You can say no.”

“Tell me what it is, first,” Minseok says, waits for him patiently. 

It takes a few minutes, with Sehun sitting up and trying to look a little more composed, and. He looks nervous, something Minseok doesn’t really associate with him. “My mom is making me go to a party this Sunday, and. Um, I was hoping you would come with me.”

“Well, where is it?” Minseok asks him, and so far, it doesn’t seem like too much of an ask. Then, Sehun speaks, changing it all. 

“Yeah, uh, that’s the thing,” he starts. He can’t seem to look at Minseok, choosing to look down at his hands instead. “It’s. It’s going to be in my old house. The one my dad kicked us out of.”

Minseok pauses, the words taking a long while to register. When the words sink in, he finds he still can’t say anything. 

He catches the look on Sehun’s face, nervous, worried. Minseok clears his throat, asks him, “Will they be there? Your father, my ex-wife?”

Sehun sniffs. “Yeah.”

There’s something he’s not saying, and it takes a few moments for Minseok to understand. “It’s their engagement party.”

Sehun doesn’t refute it. His gaze is apologetic, and Minseok sighs, pulling away from their embrace to reach for his wine, drinking deeply as he leans forward, elbows on his knees as he thinks, and tries not to at the same time. 

He has a lot he wants to ask, but he starts with, “Is your mom going?”

“Yeah. He sent her an invitation to keep up his family man facade even though everyone knows he’s a piece of shit,” Sehun says. “I don’t want to go, and my mom doesn’t either, but she’s going to and she’s making me come with.”

“So why do you want me to go with you?” Minseok asks him, still leaning forward and his elbows on his knees, and he can feel Sehun fidget a little next to him. 

“I know it’s a lot for me to ask,” he says, still nervous, “I just. I need someone on my side.”

“And your mom isn’t?” 

“No, she is,” he says, eyes wide. “But, it’s different. It’s different, with you.” 

Minseok watches as his cheeks pink, and his eyes gloss over slightly, and he goes on, “I can’t help but feel a little safe, with you. It’s like someone really has my back, and I think I need that.”

He trails off, still looking at Minseok, like he’s holding his breath. 

Minseok lets the words sink in more, thinking about it, chest heavy with the thought of seeing his wife and the man she cheated on him with, together, celebrating. He doesn’t want to. As much as he thinks he’s improved, this is something he doesn’t think he’d be able to handle. 

“Is this why we’re having drinks?” he asks, pouting himself another glass. “So I would say yes?”

“No. I know you have a strong tolerance, Chanyeol told me,” Sehun says, skin pink as he blushes, shy, sorry. “It’s. It’s mostly for me, so I would have a little more courage to ask.”

Minseok listens, not knowing what to think. He’s tired suddenly, and he wants to leave. He doesn’t want to leave Sehun behind, but he’s right: this is a very,  _ very  _ big ask. 

“Are you angry?” Sehun asks quietly, not coming nearer, and that much Minseok appreciates. The rest, not so much. 

“A little bit, I won’t lie,” Minseok tells him, sighing. He drinks, and then drinks a little more. 

Sehun shifts a little, says softly, “I’m sorry.”

It’s quiet, and Minseok makes himself think about it, really. He doesn’t want to go, never wants to see either of them, and especially not together, and he knows Sehun knows that much. 

He could say no, and he thinks that Sehun would understand, should he choose not to come. 

He thinks, thinks about it seriously, for many minutes. 

He looks next to him, when Sehun waits for him, patient, but maybe a little scared. 

He looks  _ so, so young,  _ unsure and honest and asking for help. 

And. It’s instant, and simple. Minseok doesn’t ever want to not help him. Wants to give him support, wants to help him feel safe, like. Like someone has his back, even if it is hard for him. 

He sighs again, takes another deep pull from the wine. Turns so he’s facing Sehun properly, and tells him seriously, “I’ll go, but only if you promise me you won’t make a scene.”

Sehun blinks at him, eyes brighter at his agreement, but confused, “Huh?”

“Hunnie, I know you,” Minseok says, and it’s not completely true. He doesn’t know a lot of things about Sehun. But he’s sure about this one thing, has seen it for a long time, even before they had started sleeping together. “You take opportunities to make your dad look bad. I understand where you’re coming from, but it will just give you, and your mother, more stress. So I’ll go, if you won’t make a scene.”

Sehun looks at him, and says. “But. It’s your wife.”

“And?” he says, leaning back and taking Sehun’s hand in his. “Hunnie, they don’t matter. It will hurt, but I’m going because I want to be there for you, the way you’ve been there for me. Just for you. Okay?”

Sehun watches him, his eyes slightly shining, and he curls in again tucking himself into Minseok and it’s warm, soft again. “Okay. Thank you, Minnie.”

Minseok doesn’t say anything, letting Sehun melt into him, get a little comfort, and he holds him, quiet. 

He ends up sleeping there, Sehun a little drunk after a few more glasses and trying to get Minseok to rail him but Minseok chuckles, not wanting to take advantage and just wanting sleep. He ends up kissing his forehead and tucking him in, getting in behind him and embracing him, Sehun asleep in minutes. 

It’s warm all around. It feels nice. 

.

Minseok dresses up in his nicest clothes, a fitted suit with a nice expensive shirt Sehun had chosen for him, and he goes to pick up Sehun from his apartment building, waiting for him in the lobby on instruction.

There’s a fire dancing on his skin, and his chest is tight with a lot of things he can’t name. He mostly hopes he doesn’t panic and throw up or cry, but he does his best to keep calm, waiting near the entrance.

When Sehun comes out of the elevator, in a black suit and colorful patterned silk shirt underneath the blazer unbuttoned down to his chest, his hair slicked back, Minseok stops. Sehun smiles as he spots him, walks over to him and takes Minseok’s hand, and he looks handsome, like the world is there for him to take (which it is), and the only sign betraying his confidence is the way his palm sweats slightly, trembling a little in Minseok’s hand.

“Hi, baby,” Minseok says, smiling for him, trying to give him a little comfort. It seems to work, because Sehun smiles a little wider, leans down to kiss him. “You look really good.”

“You’re almost perfect,” Sehun says, and at Minseok’s cocked eyebrow, he leans in, and unbuttons the top buttons of his shirt, until it matches his own, a generous sliver of his chest showing. “Ah. Perfect.”

Minseok rolls his eyes, but he lets it be, and takes his hand again, walking them over so they can get to his car in the parking garage, asking him, “Your mother?”

“You’ll meet her there, she went ahead,” Sehun says, “Her place is further out so she decided to leave earlier.”

“Hmm,” he hums, mostly because he doesn’t have anything to add or say.

The drive to Sehun’s old home is quiet, Sehun holding on tight to the hand Minseok has on his thigh as he drives, evident of his nervousness, and Minseok just lets him, knowing he needs the comfort himself.

They park a ways off, and Minseok holds his hand as they walk towards the house, a lush mansion, ornate and walls of vines. Minseok feels Sehun freeze up next to him when they first see the place, and Minseok pauses, looking at him, trying to gage what to do.

Sehun doesn’t speak for a while, and when he does eventually, it’s quiet, tired, “I didn’t think I’d ever come back here.”

Minseok squeezes his hand, bring it up to his lips to press a little kiss. Sehun breathes, and he’s the one to lead them now, coming through the gate and coming through the main entrance. 

As big as it was outside, it feels even larger inside, with high ceilings and chandeliers and glass, so much glass everywhere, but Minseok feels suffocated, and with the way Sehun holds on to his hand for dear life, he thinks he feels the same way as well. There are people mingling about, dressed to the nines and they have an air about them, something untouchable as they laugh and hang together, and it adds to the heaviness that’s setting on both their shoulders. The way they all stare at both of them as they try to navigate their way through, knowing exactly who they are, what they’ve done, already speculating on why they’d come here, maybe even thinking that they’re plotting to make a bit of drama. Minseok feels especially burdened.

“Sehun,” a woman comes up to them, and Minseok knows from her warm eyes and smile that it’s Sehun’s mother. Sehun is visibly relaxed, comforted when he turns to hug her for several moments, reminding Minseok again of how young he is.

When he pulls away, he smiles, says, “Mom, this is Kim Minseok. Min, this is my mother.”

Minseok goes to bow politely, but she pulls him in for a warm hug, and it surprises him a little. He hugs back regardless, and he catches the happy smile on Sehun’s face.

Her face is bright when she pulls back, and she says, “Ah, Sehun has spoken a lot about you.”

“He has?” Minseok turns to look at Sehun, who just turns red.

“Yes,” she says, smiling still, but she doesn’t say anything more about it, letting it be theirs. MInseok appreciates it greatly. “Thank you for coming with him tonight. He won’t say, but he’s nervous. As am I, but I’m more comforted knowing you’re here for him.”

“Of course,” he says, bowing to her, and it’s. Nice, he thinks. To be thought of well, that she doesn’t care to mention the fact he might be closer to her age than he might want to admit, that him being here might cause trouble. That she knows he’s here for Sehun, and Sehun only, and it’s enough to trust him for now.

They’re seated together near the end of the long, long table, Sehun in between them, and he stares down. “I’ve always hated this table.”

“I’m the one who picked this table, you brat,” his mother chides him and Minseok smiles, chuckling as Sehun pouts at his mother and they bicker lovingly back and forth. 

The lightness disappears almost immediately when the couple of the party descends and welcomes everyone, hand in hand, and Minseok is crushed. Soeun looks beautiful, as she always has, and it looks  _ wrong,  _ for her to be beside such a vile person, have that ring on her finger and Mr. Oh is in his best wear, expensive, cold, and they don’t fit in any way.

Minseok feels his hand be taken, held and squeezed tightly, and he looks down to see Sehun rubbing his thumb against his skin, trying to comfort and find comfort. Minseok squeezes back, appreciating him so fucking much, wanting to give him that support in return. 

It doesn’t take long for Soeun, Mr. Oh to see them, and the shock is instantly visible on their faces. Sehun keeps his chin up, and Minseok does his best to follow him, reminds himself,  _ ‘Just for him. Just for him.’ _

As much as they try to school their faces and be gracious, it’s not quite successful. Sehun’s father is  _ furious,  _ almost red in the face despite trying to laugh at a joke one of his colleagues says near the head of the table, and Soeun can’t look at the direction of where they’re sitting, unwilling to meet Minseok’s eyes as they make the rounds. 

The food is good as it comes out, Minseok supposes, but he can barely focus on it. He watches as Sehun just plays around with his own food on the plate, taking bites when his mother or Minseok prompts him to, and. As confident and loud and forward he is with his father, as much as he just knows what to say and how to hit a nerve when he’s around him, being here, with his mother, in a party that effectively and decisively shows his father’s future, without them. Minseok can only imagine what he must be thinking. 

“Hey,” Minseok says, pats his thigh gently, “Hunnie.”

Sehun looks at him, quiet. Very unlike the Sehun he’s come to know. 

“Remember, it might not be much, but I’m here for you,” Minseok says. Sehun’s mother looks at them, quiet, and Minseok catches the small nod she gives him, appreciative. “You have people here, for you. You have a good life, without him.”

Sehun looks at him, and his eyes soften and brighten, a little more similar to the side Minseok knows. It hurts, seeing them, but seeing Sehun not be completely himself, and Minseok realizes he’d been wrong to tell him not to make a scene. 

“Sorry for being too harsh on you,” he says, and Sehun’s eyes widen, confused for a moment, before he understands, shakes his head. 

“No. I,” he tries, thinking of the words. “I thought that when I would get here, yeah. Maybe I’d do something to piss him off. But, now. I just want to go home,” he says. “This place, it was never kind to me.”

Minseok holds his hand, and Sehun leans his head on Minseok’s shoulder, and. They’re both over it, they don’t have anything to prove. Minseok wants to go home, too.

“Ah, well, look here,” Sehun’s father’s voice is loud, cruel in its feigned sweetness as they come to their area of the table. “You decided to come.”

“It was only appropriate to bid our old life together goodbye, properly, finally, with this new beginning for you,” Sehun’s mother says, smiling politely, but no other emotion on her face. Soeun looks at her, then at where Sehun pulls away from him, sitting up properly, and where Minseok still holds his hand, both silent. 

“Yes, thank you,” he says, looks over to them as well. His face stays the same, and Minseok watches as Soeun wraps her hand tightly around his elbow, warning. “Sehun. Won’t you say hello to your old man?”

Sehun looks up at him, and Minseok sees it. The cold glint in his eye, ready to fire. “Sure. Do you know where he is?”

Mr. Oh’s eyes narrow slightly, his smile widening, betraying his cool exterior. “Ah. You’ve always had quite a tongue, must have inherited it from me.”

“Well shit, I hope not,” Sehun says, giving him a little smile, insincere. Minseok keeps his hand on his, trying to anchor him down to where he is, letting him know that this isn’t worth it. 

Sehun’s father is about to blow a fuse, and they all know it. It’s only for appearances that he manages to smile in turn, changing the topic, “So, you brought Minseok with you.”

“Yes, he’s a wonderful date,” Sehun says, beaming. “I see you brought Minseok’s wife? Papers haven’t even been signed yet, already celebrating?”

“Hunnie,” Minseok murmurs, things getting out of hand. He tries to give him a firm look, but with the way his father just laughs, smug, it gets Minseok angry, too.

“Ah, I knew this would happen,” he says, voice booming, “Growing up without me, I knew it would make you, what’s the word? Soft? Weak?”

“Honey, that’s enough,” Soeun says, looking concerned but her tone bites. She may not be the person Minseok had wanted to spend the rest of his life with anymore, but she’s still kind, still wanting to do some right, even if she’s done a lot of wrong.

Sehun’s mother, steady, beautiful presence, cuts in, smiling but her voice cold, says, “Sehun has grown up wonderfully, without you. It’s truly wonderful that your son wants to be nothing like you.” She ends with a grin, like a true legend.

The smile slips slightly from his face. His tone is harder when he says, challenges, “So what? Is he supposed to be a better man?”

“Oh, that’s not a question,” she even laughs. Minseok’s respect and admiration for her soars. 

Minseok clears his throat, because he’s here to support Sehun, and he will show it, “And he will continue to become a better man, precisely because  _ you _ are  _ not _ in his life, and that he is far from you.”

He stares at Minseok, gaze hard, challenging. He glances at Sehun, asks him, “You think that's true, then, Sehun?”

Sehun stares back, and he holds Minseok’s hand, standing his ground. “I don’t know if I’m better, but. In the very least, I think I’m okay, knowing I wasn’t raised by a man who deliberately steals other people’s spouses-“

“That’s enough,” Minseok says, standing from his seat and fixing his jacket, seeing the way Soeun looks at him, his chest, and he thinks nothing of it. He’s past hat. “Mr. Oh, Soeun, thank you for dinner, and congratulations on your engagement. Excuse us, we will go for some air.”

He pulls Sehun up, and Minseok makes him bow, and he tries to get his mother to come with them, she smiles, shaking her head. 

“I think I’ll have a smoke, atmosphere here is suffocating.”

“We’ll go with you-“

“No, really,” she says, standing, and looks between them, knowing. “Why don’t you show him around, Sehun?”

“I’d rather burn the house down,” Sehun says brightly, and she pinches his ear, making him whine. 

Sehun does as he’s told, touring Minseok around the place and showing him the rooms, each one grander than the last, each room dripping in money and riches and success, and it’s beautiful, but nothing appeals to him. To think, that this is where Soeun will live, actually has been living in. Minseok doesn’t know her that well anymore, much less than he originally thought, if she is now the type of person who would live like this.

He looks around, and Sehun looks as much. “It’s so different. It was simpler, when we were still here.”

Minseok looks at him, still a little cross, because Sehun crossed the line earlier, but he sees the exhaustion in his eyes. It may look different, but this is still the place where many of his earliest memories took place, many of them evidently not warm.

They’re on the second floor when Sehun says quietly, “I’m sorry.”

“You said too much,” Minseok says, sighing. 

“I know,” he says. “I’m sorry.”

Minseok looks at him, where he’s paused outside a closed double door entrance. He asks him, “Are you okay?”

Sehun is quiet, then he looks at him, says, “I don’t know.”

He opens the door, and from the sheer size of it, the grandeur of the room and large bed and decorations, it’s easy to tell that this is the master bedroom. They go in, and Minseok sees so many signs of them both; in Sehun’s fathers designer ties and watches displayed in a large open cabinet, Soeun’s clothes, some of which she had when they were together, and many more, new and expensive. Her makeup neatly organized on top of a small table, and even just her scent. 

Minseok’s chest gets heavy, and he feels his eyes sting when he takes in the room. The room where she’s making a life for herself, after him. 

Doing it so easily, leaving him behind. He’s crushed. 

He feels Sehun’s eyes on him, quiet, considerate. He gives Minseok the moment, and it’s a few minutes before he says, “Let’s ruin the bed.”

“What?” Minseok looks at him, not liking the grin on his face. 

“We can either burn it, or fuck on it,” Sehun offers, and Minseok snorts despite his sadness. Sehun chuckles, and goes silent again, watching him, and it’s a while before he says tenderly, “Are you okay?”

Minseok doesn’t speak for some time. He doesn’t know what to say. “I don’t want to think about them,” he says, feeling it deep in his gut. He’s sad, but. He doesn’t want to do that, doesn’t want Sehun to think that way, either, because they don’t matter anymore. He is hurt, sad, but eventually, he knows, he will stop caring. 

“Show me your old room,” he says instead, giving him a smile, holding his hand again.

Sehun pauses, “I. I don’t know,” he says. He’s hesitant, “It doesn’t hold very fond memories.”

“Having revenge sex in your father’s room won’t give you fond memories either, Hunnie. I promise,” he tells him. “If we’ll do this, it will be in  _ your  _ room, and we can make a new memory there, for you.”

“I’m not sure,” Sehun says, and Minseok’s heart breaks for him. Can’t believe someone as bright as Sehun could be brought down to this by this house, by old memories that shouldn’t matter anymore. He’s living wonderfully.

Minseok leans up, kisses him gently, and Sehun leans in easily, clinging to him. It takes a few minutes, before Minseok says quietly, “I don’t want to do anything that will make you feel uncomfortable, and I’ll do anything for you, you know. But, I want to be with you somewhere that can just be ours. Because I really, truly, genuinely like you.”

Sehun’s eyes soften, and his lip trembles slightly. His hands finds Minseok’s face, and he leans down to kiss him, quiet, and Minseok tastes the gratitude, relief on his tongue. “Okay.”

The room is clean. Scarily clean, in the way hotel rooms are freshened up each day, ready for guests, devoid of personality, just. Clean. 

Minseok looks around, noting the large bed and cream walls and standard closet and. He doesn’t see any Sehun, in the room.

Sehun must read his mind, because he says, “Huh. He got rid of all my stuff.”

Minseok turns to look at him, sees him staring at the wall next to the bed, bringing up a hand to touch the matte surface. “I used to have posters here. And a desk, which I vandalized all the time. And, the walls were orange.”

“Orange?” Minseok says, and Sehun shrugs. 

“I was a tacky kid, I dyed my hair rainbow once to piss my old man off,” he says. “I looked good. It was a pain to maintain, though.”

“So. He got rid of it all?” Minseok asks, so, so sad, chest aching for him.

“He basically purged any trace of me from this place,” Sehun says, and. He doesn’t sound sad, angry. It’s just resigned, tired, and he sighs, “So it’s basically a guest room now.”

Minseok sniffs, comes up to him, and takes his hand. Sehun squeezes back, but doesn’t look at him, just yet. 

“I’m sorry,” Minseok says. Sehun chuckles, a little ironically, and he turns to face him. His smile is small, but it’s sincere. 

“Don’t be,” he says. “I hated this place. He’s welcome to do whatever he wants. I just regret that I’ve never had sex in here.”

Minseok rolls his eyes, and Sehun grins. Minseok knows what he’s thinking before he even says it, sees the glint in his eyes. 

“Help me change that?” 

And Minseok won’t refuse him. He even looks forward to it. 

Sehun leans in, kissing him, and it’s hot immediately, his tongue licking in and not wasting time. 

Minseok opens his mouth obediently, letting him take a little, then more and more, their tongues curling together and the expensive champagne and miniature steak from earlier is gone; all they can taste is each other, tongues delving in deep. 

Sehun strips Minseok of his jacket, his shirt, his belt, and Minseok does the same. Fishes out the lube he knows Sehun had hidden in his pants, drops it on the bed, and sets his palms over Sehun’s ass, pulling him closer, making him cling on to his shoulders. 

“Baby,” Minseok hums, dragging his mouth down Sehun’s sharp jaw, his neck, taking in the throaty, whiny noises, vibrating from deep within his chest. 

“Minnie,” Sehun moans, moving with Minseok as he removes his jacket, undoes the buttons of his shirt. They throw their clothes to the floor as they strip, and as soon as they’re naked, Minseok tugs him back in until they’re flush together, and they moan into each other’s mouths loudly as their cocks rub against each other, not hard just yet but almost there. 

“Fuck,” Sehun moans, nails clawing onto Minseok’s back as their bodies rock together, their dicks sliding against each other, on their bellies. Minseok moans with him, sucking on his lips, taking it into his mouth, squeezing his ass and smacking it, and the sound rings through the room, and Minseok takes the whine Sehun feeds into his mouth. 

“Come over here,” Minseok breathes, guides him to sit on the edge of the end of the bed, and he makes Sehun lie back, and in the low light, he’s pink all over, panting, his thighs trembling. 

Minseok holds his thighs, sliding his hands up his skin, getting down to his knees quietly, always eye level with Sehun’s long, thick cock. The moment he touches his length, Sehun cries, back arching as he tries to pump his cock into Minseok’s hand. Minseok kisses his hip, pinning down his body as much as he can, and he’s gorgeous, moaning, whimpering and biting into the sheets as he tries to drown out his noise. He’s chest is so bright, and his dick getting stiff on its own, just seeing him like this, pliant underneath his gaze. 

When he gets his mouth on Sehun’s cock, the cry Sehun lets out is  _ loud,  _ strangled, and desperate. His whole body shakes as Minseok takes more and more of his cock into his mouth, and Minseok moans around his cock, his dick heavy and hot in his mouth. Minseok sucks his cock, and it’s been so many years since he’d given anyone a blowjob. The way Sehun whimpers and moans for him, the way he tastes on his tongue, and even the way he chokes him makes Minseok forget everything, everyone else.

He pulls back and traces the thickest vein on his cock with his tongue, getting drunk off of the moans Sehun feeds him. It gets even louder when he flattens his tongue and licks the head of his dick aggressively, and Minseok  _ loves _ the way Sehun moves, his whines as he lets Minseok have his way with him. Perfect, perfect boy, perfect baby. 

Minseok gets his cock wet, slick, and Sehun cries, reaching down to card his fingers through Minseok’s hair, tugging. Minseok chokes again, pulling off and breathing deeply. 

“Sorry, sorry,” Sehun says, voice breathy as he struggles to sit up, eyes worried as he watches Minseok. “I’m sorry.”

“It’s alright,” Minseok says, swallowing. He touches his cock, wet with his spit and stiff, hard and spilling a bit of precome all over his belly, and Sehun squirms, reaching down to get his hand around his cock as well. The moan he gives Minseok makes him bite his lip, reach down to touch his own cock, hard, just a little more to get him ready, already wanting to be buried inside Sehun’s ass. 

“Turn over for me, Hunnie,” he says, voice low as he helps him along, stomach on the bed. He pulls him back to get his feet on the floor, his ass hanging over the edge, and Minseok gulps down, watching him as he gets his elbows on the mattress, throwing his head back to get his hair off his face and just. Wanting, to be fingered open and stretched by his cock. 

He’s beautiful, delicious, and Minseok smacks his ass lightly. Sehun whines, asking for more, and he’s perfect. Perfect baby. 

He takes the lube and slicks his fingers up for him, warming it up, and Sehun doesn’t stop moaning, grunting, “Please. Need your fingers in me. Such a slut for it.”

Minseok’s cock twitches at the words, and he pushes the first finger in, almost all the way up to the knuckle, just to hear Sehun  _ sob,  _ squeezing his ass around him and making Minseok moan, push in further until his whole finger is in his hole. 

“Oh, oh fuck,” Sehun mutters, body shaking as Minseok twists his fingers around a bit, and he visibly struggles to stay up on his elbows. It’s not long at all before he asks for another finger, begs for it, and Minseok is quick to give it to him, thrusting two fingers into his ass, and Minseok is eager to fuck him, cram his cock into him. 

“Your ass, fuck,” Minseok marvels as he watches fingers open Sehun up, thrusting and getting him stretched, and Sehun moans, tilting his ass up even higher, wanting him. “Looks so sweet, taking my fingers.”

“Fuck,  _ fuck,”  _ Sehun cries, his whole body shaking. Minseok stares as his hole swallows up his fingers, greedily taking in three fingers, and his mouth waters with it. 

He lowers his head, watching as Sehun takes the fingers he fucks him with, and he feels the wail Sehun lets out when he licks around his fingers, tracing his rim, tasting him. 

“Min,  _ Minnie,”  _ Sehun sobs, his back arched impossibly as Minseok licks him, sticks his tongue inside alongside his fingers, fucking him and rimming him and driving him crazy.

“Your ass  _ is  _ sweet, Hunnie,” he says, pulling his fingers out and swiping his tongue from where he’s open and aching for Minseok’s cock, down his balls.

Sehun cries, tearing up already, hips thrusting into the air wildly, looking for purchase for his hard, needy cock. Minseok clicks his tongue, standing up, drinking in the sight of him, wild, desperate for him, and he strokes his cock, gets himself to full hardness, until it’s physically painful to not be inside Sehun. 

He pulls Sehun up from the bed, making him kneel on the edge so they can get at each other’s mouths, and Sehun whines as he tastes himself on Minseok’s tongue, and Minseok feels him try to lick in deeper, wanting to claw the taste out of him. 

“Ass out,” Minseok says, almost like a growl, coming from deep within his chest, and Sehun is eager to follow, turning around and bending low with his face smashed onto the covers and his knees still on the bed, leg muscles straining as he bends his body down to the covers, ass up and out for him, hole hungry, so much like that first time in Minseok’s office desk. He raises his ass, hole winking and desperate and Minseok stares for a long time, wanting him so,  _ so  _ much. 

Minseok stands behind him, mouth watering, and his whole body feeling hot. He pours all the remaining lube on his cock, moans as he strokes himself to spread it, cock hard and too ready to sink into Sehun’s delicious ass. 

The first pop of the head of his cock breathing through Sehun’s hole makes them both moan, Sehun clawing at the sheets as Minseok pushes his cock into his ass, inch by inch, until he’s balls deep and and Sehun is crammed full. 

_ “Fuck,  _ your cock,” Sehun moans, his walls clenching around him as he takes it in, and Minseok bites his lip, holding in and trying not to fuck Sehun into oblivion like the way he desperately wants to.

“Missed my cock?” Minseok hums, voice losing control as he reels back his hips, slowly until just the tip is inside, and he  _ rams  _ forward, all of his dick inside Sehun in a backbreaking second. 

“Missed it,  _ fuck,”  _ Sehun whines, really almost sobbing as Minseok fucks into him, hard, making him feel it. “Fuck, I’m your cockslut,  _ fuck.” _

“Let’s give them something to talk about, hm?” Minseok murmurs, and Sehun  _ screams  _ when Minseok hammers into him. Minseok takes Sehun’s hips in a tight grip, pulling his baby along onto his cock as he pounds into him from behind, their skin meeting in a lewdly glorious slap that echoes, and Minseok has no doubt he will bruise, with the way he fucks Sehun so intensely. 

“Love your ass,” Minseok breathes, squeezing one of the cheeks with his hand, kneading the skin, before he releases and  _ slaps,  _ and Sehun cries, tears leaking out as he moans and begs for more. “Such a tight little thing, but always so ready to take my cock-“

“Yes,  _ yes,”  _ Sehun tells him, arching his back even more and raising his ass up high, the perfect angle for Minseok to  _ drill _ his cock into him, sinking in, reaming him out, disgusting and completely wonderful. 

“Baby,  _ god,”  _ Minseok breathes, looking down and just  _ watching,  _ praising as he takes in the sight of Sehun’s ass taking in his cock like it was made to be inside him, the rim trying to cling on whenever he pulls out before he pounds back in. It makes his heart jump to his throat, his chest go light, and his cock get even harder as it rails into him. “You’re so tight, perfect.”

“Shit,  _ fuck, fuck, fuck,”  _ Sehun moans, chest rattling with it as he’s pounded. “Fuck me,  _ fuck.” _

“Want it harder, baby?” Minseok teases him, lowering his body to get his arms around Sehun, curling under his arms and clutching his shoulders to get him on his hands and knees, making him choke on his breath. Minseok feels the way he squeezes around his cock, and it makes him growl, drive in even harder, their skin meeting in loud, shlick noises that slap against the walls.

“Fuck,  _ fuck,  _ I want it,” Sehun begs, his cock swinging and moving with their rocking, “Want it, make your baby black out, fuck-”

“Fuck, Hunnie,” Minseok moans,  _ hammering in  _ and Sehun is crying, moaning and begging for more as Minseok wrecks his hole thoroughly. “Want that? Want to get fucked so hard you lose it?”

_ “Please,”  _ he says so prettily, and Minseok growls, goes so hard and fucking into Sehun, taking his ass and ramming into him, making him feel it. 

Sehun whines, gasps, pants as Minseok sinks into him, crams him full, and Minseok is drunk off of the noises he makes, spurring him on, fucking him harder and harder. He’s hot inside, so tight and slick and Minseok stares at the wide, pristine expanse of his back, thinks of marking it, licking it, the broadness of his shoulders, his tight little body yielding beneath him, giving him everything to take. 

Minseok groans, leans down to swipe his tongue up Sehun’s neck, and he’s crying, asking for more, always.

_ “Cockslut,”  _ Minseok breathes, and Sehun tightens impossibly around him at the words, wailing as he reaches back and takes his ass in his hands, spreads himself even more open for him, begging to be split in two.

Minseok can’t stand it; Sehun is  _ gorgeous,  _ perfect, truly deserving of a better youth than he had gotten.

“Min, Min,” Sehun pants, reaching back to touch Minseok’s hip.

Minseok stills instantly, touches his back, asks softly, “What is it, baby?”

Sehun breathes deeply for a few minutes, catching his breath, his ass so sweet and tight around him, relaxing slightly as the moments pass. “Wanna, fuck. Please let me ride you.”

And Minseok can never say no, finds himself twitching inside his ass at the thought of it.

So, in moments, he’s on his back on the bed, and Sehun is sinking down on his cock, like a throne, his body insane and slick and sweating as he seats himself on him, filling himself up. He’s bouncing immediately, eyebrows furrowed and jaw dropped in pleasure as he fucks himself, thighs shaking as he goes up and down on Minseok’s cock.

Minseok watches, unable to look away, and he’s so  _ pretty,  _ so fucking gorgeous as he rolls his hips, whining as he spreads his legs even more, getting even more of his cock inside him.

“Feel good, baby?” he asks him, voice low as he sets his hands on Sehun’s thighs, feeling him tremble as he fucks himself on him. Sehun angles his body, and the moan he releases is instant, his hands finding Minseok’s belly and his nails biting on his skin as he takes in his cock, and Minseok isn’t faring any better. 

If anything, he is overwhelmed, moaning at the sight of Sehun so obscene, throwing his head back and his torso arched as he pounds himself down. moaning about how thick his cock is, stretching and splitting him in two, his ass like heaven around him, so hot, tight. 

“God, you feel so  _ fucking good,”  _ Sehun cries, and he’s a sight, so delicious. “I’m so full, like my ass can’t take anymore.”

“You look  _ filthy,”  _ Minseok tells him, driving his hips up, and Sehun bounces, rocked on his cock and he falls, barely catching himself and he moans, louder than ever, sure enough to attract attention though the room is on the furthest corner of the house.

Sehun, naughty, obscene, pumps his hips, moving Minseok’s cock so he’s rubbing up against his walls, pleasuring himself and his chest heaves with the effort of keeping himself up, and Minseok keeps drinking him in. 

His cock bounces, slaps against their bellies as he rides him, gyrating and Minseok moans with him, his nails biting into Sehun’s hips as he rides him into oblivion, ass tight and gorgeous as he slams down on his cock.

Minseok watches him, the squelching of his cock being swallowed up by Sehun’s hole lewd, obscene, and it just gets him harder. He sits up slightly, guides Sehun’s knees up until his feet are flat on the mattress on either side of his waist, and he makes him lean back, his hands on Minseok’s thighs and the view makes Minseok choke as he falls back to the bed. Sehun, spread open for him, his cock driving up and swallowed by his hole, and his own cock, leaking and stiff, bouncing with him.

“Ride, Hunnie,” Minseok orders, and he goes, pumping and rocking his hips and fucking himself on his cock. 

“God,  _ fuck,”  _ Sehun cries, throwing his head back, overwhelmed, hanging on as he comes down on his dick, hole greedy as it takes him. “Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck.” The sweat rolling down his chest, down the hard lines of his stomach, his nipples peaked, his lips plump and his thick, gorgeous cock bouncing as he pumps his body. He’s a vision, and Minseok can’t stop praising.

“Beautiful, so beautiful,” Minseok breathes, and Sehun’s body is so, so red. “This place never deserved you. You were always made to be greater.”

“M-Minseok,” Sehun sobs, slamming down and stilling, his whole body trembling with effort, overwhelmed. 

“Your ass is so sweet, fuck,” Minseok says, reaching down with his hand and tracing where he keeps Sehun split open, and Sehun writhes, squirms as he wails. “Love it, fucking you deep.”

Sehun moans, can’t breathe without letting the noise out, and it drives Minseok on, makes him feel a little powerful. He hopes Sehun feels even more so, taking and making something good of a place he suffered quietly in for a long time. 

“Hunnie?” he says, waiting until Sehun looks down at him, panting, hair a mess, already close to fucked out. “Does it feel good? I hope it feels good.”

Sehun looks at him, stares for a long while, and then. He smiles, eyes crinkling, and he says simply, quietly, “Thank you, Minnie.”

Minseok smiles, and he gets his hands on the highest part of Sehun’s thighs, and  _ slams  _ him down to meet his hips as he lifts his body off the bed, driving his cock up into him, so, so deep.

Sehun shouts, shocked, screams as Minseok does it again, ramming his cock into him from below, their bodies meeting in loud slaps that fill the room, make it much more bearable.

“Gonna come for me soon, baby?” he asks, and Sehun can barely keep himself up anymore, sitting on his cock and panting, shaking from it all. 

“Yeah, fuck,” he moans, jolting when Minseok hammers into him again, falling forward and Minseok catches him, holds him as he breathes, cries a little on top of him, trembling. “Oh, please,  _ please,  _ Minnie, I’m gonna come. Come inside my ass, fill me up-”

“Oh, there’s my comeslut,” he murmurs, and Sehun sobs, squeezing around him. Finds his lips, kisses him, tongues melting together and Minseok breathes him all in.

Loves him, so much. 

He sits up, bringing Sehun with him, and it’s just like before, in the room he’d overstayed in Junmyeon and Yixing’s home, but Sehun is on top of him now, curling his arms around his shoulders and his legs crossing together around his waist, beautifully pliant as Minseok fucks into him from below, fucking his ass open. Minseok wraps him up in his arms, lets Sehun claw at his shoulders as he drives into him, and he breathes him in, face tucked into Sehun’s neck as he thrusts into him.

“A little more, baby,” Minseok says, and Sehun whimpers, clinging to him, overwhelmed as his ass is crammed full, and his cock, finally getting some more friction as it rubs between their bellies.

Sehun pumps his hips, Minseok rams in, fucking him full and leaving no room for anything else, and it’s almost immediate.

Sehun sobs, walls broken as he comes, spills between them, rocking his hips with no control as he shoots white across their stomachs, and Minseok  _ drives  _ in, grinding into his ass and keeping him down as the heat in his belly snaps, fills him up with come, so much that it drips down from where he’s keep Sehun stretched and full. Gushes of it leak out as Minseok pulls out carefully, and Sehun squirms on him, wincing as he’s suddenly emptied, the wetness trickling out his rim, down on to the sheets. 

“Hmm,” Sehun hums between gasps, whole body trembling, beautiful boy. 

“Are you alright?” Minseok asks him, leaning up to kiss his cheek, and Sehun slumps against him, soft and his whole body tender, spent and fucked out. 

Sehun clings to him, his whole face tucked into Minseok’s neck. He says quietly, “Thank you.”

Minseok’s chest melts, and he lowers Sehun down to the bed gently, and immediately, Sehun curls into him, tries to get nearer and nearer still.

“I didn’t do much, Sehun,” Minseok tells him, brushing his wet bangs from his head, “You’ve done much more, for me.”

Sehun chuckles, and when he meets Minseok’s gaze, his eyes are so soft, happy, quiet. 

“Min,” he says. He sounds calm, the first time since he’d entered the house, when he tells him, “I know it might seem weird, saying your dick powers have given me a little peace, but. Thank you, for doing this with me. For this night. I know it must have been hard.”

Minseok looks at him, and. He wishes he knew the words that could help him convey everything he feels. He wants to give him everything, truly. 

He doesn’t know what to say. He tries, pulling Sehun in, and kissing him, hopes he understands. 

And it could have been a perfect end to a night they had gone into with apprehension. But it’s not.

There is a banging on the door, and it makes them both jump. 

“Open this door, or I’ll knock it down,” Sehun’s father roars, knocking again, and it’s as if it’s enough on its own to knock the door of its hinges. 

Minseok freezes, but he holds Sehun close, sees him frozen as well, not knowing what to do. 

He gathers his thoughts, and looks at him, focusing on just him, ignores the banging on the door, “Let’s get dressed? Let’s face him together.”

Sehun looks scared, and it makes Minseok hate this man even more, for making him look like this. But, he nods, and Minseok helps him stand, and they dress each other, quiet, and Minseok kisses him one more time, makes it linger. 

Sehun breathes, gathers himself, and when he stands up straight again, his eyes are still apprehensive, but he looks resolved, ready. 

_ “Open this fucking door-“ _

“Ah, now I remember why I divorced you,” they hear Sehun’s mother on the other side, and his incessant growling. Straight out of a drama. 

“Let them catch their breath,” they hear Soeun trying to placate him, but it’s for naught. 

“They are being indecent and making the guests uncomfortable-“

“Wish you would have felt the same sense of embarrassment when you lured Minseok’s wife into a dalliance with you,” she says, bored, tacking on, “Sorry, dear, I’m sure you’re lovely. He’s just a piece of shit-“

“I will knock this door down if you do not come and open it  _ now-“ _

“Jesus, wait a minute,” Sehun stares daggers at the doors, unimpressed, “Or would you rather have faced us while we’re buck ass naked?”

“Hunnie, behave,” Minseok clicks his tongue at him, but his smile betrays him. Sehun smiles back, and nods his head minutely, bracing himself. 

Minseok goes to unlock the door, and even before he fully opens the door, Sehun’s father barges in, angry, face red, and Soeun and Sehun’s mother come in after them, careful to close the door and block out the noise he is about to make. 

“Did you come, just to  _ humiliate me?”  _ he hisses, glaring at them both, and Minseok feels Sehun take his hand in his, and they anchor each other. 

“Why? What did we do?” Sehun says, purposely indifferent, and they see his face getting redder, and he’s about to blow a fuse. 

“You were  _ heard,” _ he says.

“He’s twenty-four, it’s not like he’s a child,” his mother says, really so uninterested in his anger.

“This is supposed to be a respectable home,” he says, angry. Everyone aside from him and Soeun snort at the words. “You were being so publicly vulgar.”

“And?” Sehun says, and just to be insufferable, he leans his head on Minseok’s shoulder, and grins at them. “At least we didn’t do it in your room, I was very seriously considering ruining that bed, or burning it. Good thing for you Minseok has a level head and told me it would be less rude to just defile my old room instead.”

“You were very loud, darling,” his mother says, but she doesn’t look too bothered. If anything, she looks amused. 

“Sorry mom,” Sehun sighs, but he pouts at her, saying, “But I couldn’t help it, you know? You know that feeling when someone just knows how to treat you right and make you feel good?”

“Sadly no,” she sighs in turn, and Minseok immediately sees where Sehun had gotten his wit, his ability to always have something to say and take no shit. Minseok smiles, comforted that he has that presence in his life. “Unfortunately, no one’s ever been that good to me.”

“What the fuck,” Mr. Oh stares at her, appalled.

“You were never great,” she just tells him, waving him off. He squawks, and she ignores him, turning instead to Minseok, smiling as she says, “Thank you for treating him well, Minseok.”

“I, of course,” he blinks, feeling confused, not knowing why exactly he’s being thanked for making Sehun scream. He sees where Sehun gets that shameless side, as well.

His father is livid, Minseok can almost see the steam rising off his head, out his ears and nostrils. He tries to compose himself, look a little more smug as he says, “Well, I was good enough for Soeun to leave you.”

“I didn’t leave Minseok for that,” she confesses quietly, adding to the overall weirdness of the situation. She looks up, finds his eyes, and Minseok understands the simple sincerity in her voice when she says, “He was always a generous lover.”

It’s hellishly weird, everything, and Minseok doesn’t even know how to take it in. 

Sehun breaks the silence, as he does, says, “Ouch,” adding insult to injury, and making his father go completely red in the face.

“This is making me uncomfortable,” Minseok says of the conversation revolving around the topic.

“I don’t care about what makes you uncomfortable,” Mr. Oh says, staring down at them. “What I care is that you made everyone uncomfortable with your collective delinquency, and it’s unacceptable. You are on  _ my  _ property, so you act accordingly.”

It’s quiet, and Soeun’s eyes frequent over her fiance, over Minseok, trying to mediate, trying her best. Minseok really doesn’t want this future for her, always trying to appease someone and coming in second. He failed her on that part, and he’ll try to make sure someone else doesn’t do that to her again.

“Alright. You got me there, can’t argue with that,” Sehun says, breaking the silence again. He smiles, the cold one he reserves for his father, asks, “Like what you’ve done to my room, my posters were a tad tacky, so you were right to tear them down. I do miss my  _ Sakura Wars  _ poster, though. Did you hide it anywhere?”

He stares at him, infuriated, and he says, “I see you never grew out of your tendency to be. What’s the word,  _ delicate.” _

Minseok sees red, his head clouded for a moment with  _ rage,  _ dark and ugly and roaring, is only stopped when Sehun tightens his hold on his hand, reeling him back, knowing what he’s thinking. He looks unaffected, even bored, says, “Am I supposed to feel bad?”

Everyone else is not similarly casual; Sehun’s mother’s gaze completely changes, and Minseok is scared of her when she swears at him, “You foul-”

“Honey, you’re being disgusting,” Soeun says, firmly then, to everyone’s surprise, except Minseok’s; somehow, he understands. “You can be angry, but you should  _ never  _ discriminate. That’s your  _ son,  _ think of what you’re saying-”

“Minseok makes a great match for you, then,” he says, ignoring her completely. The downward curl of his mouth shows his disgust. “He was always full of air.”

And Minseok’s had enough. Never should have let it come this far, in the first place. “You can say whatever you want about me, but Soeun is right; Sehun is _ your son,” _ he says, feeling the ice in his voice. “You may not want him in your life, and he certainly doesn’t want you in his, but you can’t pretend to be a good father and attempt this facade of civility in front of your guests while speaking to him this way behind closed doors. We may have made your guests uncomfortable with our noise, and I apologize sincerely, but we aren’t hiding who we are and what we have and how we came to be from them, at least. I cannot say the same of you, sadly. And to think I admired you for years. So many wasted years. Sehun and your ex-wife were right to leave.”

He looks winded, staring at Minseok after he finishes, and Minseok knows the look. Sees it a lot at work with opposing lawyers; he doesn’t have anything to say in return.

He doesn’t care, either way. 

“Let’s go, Hunnie,” he says, pulling him along out the door, offering the other to Sehun’s mother, smiling at her. “I’ll drive you back to your place.”

“Oh, it’s rather far,” she says, but she takes his proffered hand and grins flirtatiously. Sehun gives his mother a look, catching the expression on her face.

Sehun’s father, on the other hand, looks desperate, grasping at straws as Soeun tries to calm him down. The door is open and they’re out in the hallways when a cruel grin spreads across his face, says loudly at Minseok’s back as he says, “Well, regardless of how Soeun and I started, at least our standards aren’t low. We’re not easy, like that.”

A gasp, and a slap, resounding. “Stop it,” Soeun says furiously, “That’s too far.”

Minseok himself is nothing short of livid, to think that he would say that of Sehun, and he looks back into the room, sees Mr. Oh clutching his face where Soeun had struck him, staring in shock at her, and she’s in tears, so, so angry. And Minseok sees then, how much she’s been suffering, how her judgement had backfired on her, and while he doesn’t love her like that anymore, she doesn’t deserve this life.

He’s gone too far, far too many times tonight.

“I won’t hit you, because you don’t deserve my energy,” he says, not even bothering to go back into the room, “But you really are the poorest man I know.”

“What do you mean?” he hisses, hysterical, still holding his face as he glares at Minseok. He gestures around, waving around his expensive watch and the house and Minseok could care less. “Does any of this scream poor to you?”

“Yes. All of it,” Minseok replies. “You have all of this, but you don’t know how to appreciate it. A son who works hard and is so talented, a goddess of an ex-wife, and a wife to be who is the kindest, loveliest person I know, but you don’t treat any of them right, and it makes me pity you.”

“You don’t need to pity me. I have everything,” he says, tone biting.

“You’re right. You have everything, and I cannot stand working for you,” he says, done with it all. “I quit.”

He leaves before he can catch the look of shock and outrage on his face, pulling Sehun and his mother along with him, paying no mind to everyone who stares at them along the way as they get to his car.

The drive is mostly light, but quiet, and she embraces him, kisses his cheek as he walks her up to the entrance of her apartment building, telling him, “Thank you, Minseok. Take care of yourself, now.”

“Thank you,” he says, smiling at her. 

Sehun bids her goodbye similarly, and Minseok stands a way off when they converse quietly, watching the way Sehun’s cheeks pink considerably. 

They get back to his car, and they’re quiet for a while as Minseok goes in the direction of Sehun’s apartment, at least forty minutes away. The silence isn’t so much suffocating or awkward, but. Just, unsure.

“Min,” Sehun starts eventually, ten minutes in, always the one to break the silence, “I’m sorry.”

“Why are you apologizing?” Minseok says, bringing a hand over to grasp his thigh, letting him know it’s okay. “Your dad is a piece a shit. We’ve known that all along.”

“I’m still sorry,” Sehun says. “You got dragged into it all.”

“Hunnie,” he says, keeping his voice gentle. “He shouldn’t have talked to you that way. Don’t apologize. I should have done more.”

Sehun is quiet after that, and Minseok stays quiet, as well. It’s not very late, but there’s thankfully not much traffic. It’s been a long night. 

“Are you alright?” he asks Sehun, wants him to be. 

“Yeah,” he says after he thinks about it for a minute. “I think I am. I feel a little lighter.” He looks tired, but not in the way he had earlier, resigned and just waiting for time to pass by. Now, he just looks worn down from the day, relieved it’s almost over, and his eyes are brighter than they were back in his father’s mansion. 

Sehun glances at him, and lingers. Asks him, “What about you, Min? You  _ did  _ just quit.”

“Yeah, I did, huh?” he says. And, truthfully, the statement he’d made is really beginning to sink in now. He really told his insufferable pain in the ass of a boss that he quit, leave the firm he’d worked so hard to get into and even harder to get the position he currently had, so many years of work and effort and making promises to his wife that he’ll be on time for dinner the next day or that he’ll make himself free the whole weekend for her and so many other things. 

He’s really leaving, ending a chapter of his life.

It’s a little scary, but mostly, it’s relief he feels, not quite excitement to begin anew and rest, but just, acceptance, unsure but ready. 

“I think I’ll be okay,” he answers. “I think I’ll go take that time off, like I said before. Go back home like I said I would, try to heal a little more.”

“What about your wife?” Sehun asks him, and he sounds timid. He doesn’t need to be, but Minseok understands where he’s coming from.

And Minseok, Sehun. They’d both seen her, finally coming to terms with the fact that the person she thought she’s engaged to, isn’t who she thought he was. 

Minseok tells him the truth, “I’m worried. She’s. She’s going to need someone in her corner, and it can’t be me, because she hurt me and it will take time for me to be truly over that, but. She fell for the wrong person.”

“Min, she cheated on you. She made that choice, she broke your heart,” Sehun tells him. It’s all true, and Minseok doesn’t deny it.

“I know,” he says quietly, at the second to last stoplight until they get to Sehun’s building. He can’t stay in this, has to move on, but says still, “You’re right. But earlier, she showed me, some of the girl I asked out to ice creams in college that first day we met is still there.”

Sehun looks at him, quiet for several moments. He asks him, “Are you even over her? After everything?”

It’s a hard question to ask, and hard to answer. But Minseok is sure when he says, “I think so. Now, especially. We were always going to be on different paths.”

“How about when we were doing shit together?” Sehun asks, “Were you in love with her, then?”

“We both know we were using each other to get back at them,” Minseok tells him, and it’s hard to admit, but it’s the truth. As much as he enjoyed it all, loved getting to know Sehun, when they began, it was to find comfort and a little revenge, and maybe. Something of a rebound. 

Being in love with Sehun now, fully, doesn’t change the fact that that is how they began. “It was childish, Hunnie. We were good, but our timing, our initial motives, we were wrong, too.”

Sehun goes very, very quiet. His grip on Minseok’s hand over his thigh slacks slightly, and Minseok knows he’s hurt him, a little. 

Minseok doesn’t expect the next thing he says at all, tender and honest and heart bared, “Minseok. I really like you. I, I don’t feel so hurt, with you.”

Minseok’s heart aches, and they’re in front of Sehun’s building. He stops the car, and turns to look at Sehun. Makes himself be a little more open for him, so he knows how much he means to him. Just in his head, the words already hurt him. “I’ve come to like you, so much. You have given me  _ so much more  _ than what I deserve, and telling you all this, even though we need it to be said, it aches. I’m sorry.”

Sehun sniffs, but he doesn’t break the gaze. He reaches out to touch Minseok’s knee, and Minseok pulls him a little closer, cupping his face. 

“But. It’s not the right time,” he says. It tastes bitter on his tongue, but it’s what needs to be said. “I know that’s frustrating to hear, but things are too fresh. Maybe in the future. But please believe me when I say that I really do want the world for you, Hunnie. I’ll really do anything for you. You should do everything you want to do.”

Sehun leans forward, kisses him. Minseok is surprised for a moment, but he kisses him back, deepens the press of their lips and just takes him in, one more time. 

“What about you?” Sehun asks him, eyes tender and just. Just for him.

Minseok smiles for him. “I’ll be fine. You gave me many smiles. They will tide me over.”

It’s a small goodbye. 

They don’t see each other for a few weeks, after that. But Minseok was right; just remembering his smile, he is appeased, despite the hurt.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> epilogue in the next part.


	3. it will let us grow

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> final part

Minseok has a lot of free time, now.

He doesn’t know what to make of it. But, he starts slow, and sure. Calls his parents, tells them of most of the things that have happened, and he cries a bit, his mom cries a bit.

They tell him to come home. So, he makes arrangements.

He has dinner with Jongdae, Baekhyun, Chanyeol, three or four times in one week. They keep him sane, happy, and he’s not worried. He knows he’ll be friends for life, with them.

Junmyeon hugs him a lot. Yixing kisses the top of his head. He thanks them for everything, and they cry with him. They help him find a good apartment building with Chanyeol’s help, turns out to be the same building Kyungsoo lives in. There’s a good unit, in need of renovation, but it can be all his. So, he buys it, plans for the interior to be fixed to fit his style, new beginnings, and schedules for it to be done within the months he’ll be taking time off, back in his parents' place. By the time he comes back, it will be done, and it feels like lightness in his chest, the relief of it all.

Minseok is Junmyeon’s best man, and it’s a few months before they’re married. Planning is at its busiest.

He puts a hold on job searching, and painfully, reluctantly, looks up numbers of psychiatrists and therapists in his home province, and some in the city. Makes the calls, makes appointments. He cries, full on breaks down, on the first few sessions. The second time, after the baseline blood tests, the psychiatrist asks him to bring Junmyeon, talks about the medication he’s going to take to deal with it all. 

Junmyeon had cried, that day, when he confirmed what they knew for a while. Severe depression, and the medication sounded intimidating, and he’d asked so many questions. Minseok is thankful he did, a little tired himself from all the emotions he has to speak about, and they cried together on the way home. It was relief. 

The therapist is patient, and asks if he is alright with being hugged when he pauses, cries about his marriage, his sadness. How he always feels so incompetent all the time.

It’s a lot. But, after the first few times, it changes. Slow, but he sleeps better, eats well, and Junmyeon even tells him,  _ “Your cheeks haven’t been this full in years, Min.” _

It’s slow, but it helps. It’s an ongoing journey and it’s hard but he can only get better if he wants to get better. 

And he wants to get better, for his family, for his friends, the people who have helped him most, for. For Sehun, despite their mutual agreed silence, and mostly, for himself. 

So, he’s okay. Slow, slow, slow, but. It’s sure, sure than most things he has in his life, and that in itself is a treasure he doesn’t want to take for granted. 

Kyungsoo works miracles. He and Soeun come to an agreement, and everything is finalized, and. They’re done, they’re over, end of something Minseok had held so dear. It had hurt, but after, he had gotten to a point where he knew he would be okay. It would just take some time. 

He and Sehun limit their contact to messaging. Minseok misses him, so much. Sehun tells him he misses him too, and it takes a while for Minseok to believe it. 

But they know they need it. They need the time. 

It just seems so long, and Minseok counts the days. 

.

The days leading up to Minseok’s temporary move back to his parent’s place mostly consist of him packing up everything he thinks he’ll need, everything he’s brought over to Junmyeon’s place, and the others he’d kept away at his old place, the place untouched since Soeun had moved out. Mostly clothes, shoes, some gifts he’d promised them a long time ago, and. It feels like he’s packing up most of his life, and he essentially is. 

It’s a little humbling, when he realizes that everything fits into two large suitcases and a carry-on. 

He leaves most of his anime figuring and action figure collection with Chanyeol, safekeeping for until he gets back, and knowing he’s always been especially fond of it, and half of his book collection goes to Jongdae for the time being. A quarter, he packs up to bring with him, and the other quarter, the ones with topics revolving around corporate law, he donates to the library. He’s sure it will be an exciting read. 

But in his packing, he realizes he had kept some things that were Soeun’s. A few books on planning a garden, a small dream she’d had when they had gotten married that couldn’t really come to fruition since they lived in an eighth floor apartment. Other books on smart personal finance management, and architecture books for tropical houses, modern homes, and unique minimalist styles. 

She’d had big dreams for them, as did he. But they never met up in the middle to discuss them. He smiles sadly to himself when he realizes. 

He invites her over to their shared apartment before he leaves, so she can get them. Being back, it’s weird, lonely. He’s essentially wiped himself off from the apartment. He knows she will too, eventually, after everything settles a bit more. He doesn’t know what she plans for after, and he hopes for the best, for her. 

They had dreams here. Had the beginnings of a life here. It’s strange, that he’s sad, but also, ready to leave it behind. 

He’s sitting in the couch when Soeun comes in, and it’s the first time they’ve seen each other since the divorce had been settled. And, he finds that he’s not angry, or sad, or feeling negativity towards her when he sees her. Instead, he feels warm, happy as he smiles at her, and she smiles at him. 

“Hey,” he says, and he thought it would have been awkward, them meeting again, but. They were together for so long, and it’s easy to stand up to meet her halfway, and greet her with a kiss on her cheek. Platonic, friendly. 

“Hi,” she returns, smiling. “You almost done with packing?”

“Yeah,” he says, “I’m ready to go back home.”

“That’s great,” she says, and her smile is bright for him. They’ve been through a lot together, and he doesn’t know if they’ll ever get to a point of becoming friends, but he’ll always have so much love for her. 

“So, here are some of your things,” he says, handing her a paper back with her books, which she takes gratefully. “Will you be packing up here soon?”

“Yeah,” she says. “Been packing up in the mansion, too.”

Minseok pauses, looks at her. “What? Aren’t you moving in with him?”

“No, I found a place of my own, it’s small, just what I need,” she says. She smiles still, but he can tell she’s a little sad. 

He doesn’t understand, doesn’t know what happened for them to not be living together, but he waits, patient for her to explain things to him, or not. It’s up to her.

When she speaks, he doesn’t expect what she says. “I’m sorry about what happened before,” she says, her gaze apologetic, her whole stance remorseful. “When I cheated on you. Especially when I pushed you and kissed you, a few weeks ago. I know I must have hurt you a lot, then.”

Minseok blinks, surprised. But he’s thankful for her apology, and finds that he’d forgiven her for it, already. 

“It’s okay,” he tells her. “I’ve done shitty things too. I’m sorry.”

She just smiles. “It’s alright.”

He pauses, thinks if he should ask her. Decides to try, “Are you still getting married to him?”

Soeun looks at him, and her gaze changes. Looks so sad, a little beaten down, not knowing what to do. “I know you think me foolish, but. I really do love him. Different in the way I loved you, but still true.”

“I know you do,” Minseok says, and he understands where she may come from. Soeun loves with her whole self, and even though Sehun’s father was a piece of shit, there must have been a side of himself that he showed or feigned to her, that made her fall in love with him. But, it wasn’t his true side, and she’d been too late to realize. It’s hard to make yourself fall out of love once you were all in, as she was. “You didn’t answer me, though.”

She sniffs a little. Keeps her composure, as she always have, and tells him, “I’m having my doubts. Especially after what had happened. He’s not the person I thought him to be.”

“Leave him,” Minseok says instantly. “He’ll hurt you.”

“And where will I go?” she asks him, smiling sadly. “I know I no longer have you.”

“The world is out there for you, Soeun. And while we may not be together anymore, I’ll always support you,” he tells her, meaning every word. He cares about her a lot, despite everything. He wants her to be happy.

She smiles at him, her eyes slightly glassy, and she says, “Thank you, Min. I’ll always support you too.”

He comes forward, because he knows a little bit, how it is to feel lonely and not sure of what to do next, and he hugs her. It feels different, from their hugs when they were together, but she embraces him in return, and he’s glad to give her a little comfort. 

“And. About Sehun,” she says, when she pulls away.

Minseok blinks, “What about him? Did he do something?”

“He somehow got my number, called me the other day,” she reveals to him, but her face is neutral, and he can’t tell if it was a bad call or not. “Then his mother called me yesterday. They both checked on me. Was that you?”

Minseok blinks again, even more confused, and he tells her, “No. I, I didn’t tell him to do anything. What did you talk about?”

“He just asked me how I was doing,” she says. “Told me a few things about his father. Apologized.”

She leaves out the details, and Minseok realizes that that is between just them. He understands. “It was okay, right?”

“Yeah,” she says easily, and she smiles. Minseok realizes quickly it’s for him, “Well, he’s a good person. I’d be happy if you worked it out with him.”

“I don’t know about that, now,” he says, and he keeps his smile on his face, but he’s unsure, a little sad. “I’ll be gone for a while.”

She looks at him, her gaze warm, understanding. “Speaking as someone who cares about you and saw you together, I know he’ll miss you. He cares about you. Talk to him.”

.

He’s in his office, packing. 

After the whole debacle at the party, he hadn’t had the time, or courage, to come here, pack up everything. But, now, after talking about it with his therapist and preparing himself on what to do and how to handle it with the psychiatrist, it feels less like a blow, and more. Moving on.

Chanyeol helps him, putting the things Minseok wants to keep in one box, the others in another for donation. Minseok is slightly surprised when he sees how much he’s willing to let go, but as he peruses through the items in the donation box, he finds that he can live without them. He’ll be okay.

“Are you going to keep working here?” Minseok asks him as they clear his desk, and Chanyeol just beams at him.

“Nope!” he answers, helping him organize the papers to be passed on to the firm, “I only really stayed for you, and Dae and Baek. But I would  _ never  _ work for them even though they offered really nicely, but I’m going to work on music full time. Some opportunities have come up, and I’m really excited.”

“Good,” Minseok smiles at him. “I’m so happy for you.”

“I’m really happy for you too, Min,” he says. His eyes are shiny when he tells him, “I haven’t seen you so light in a long time.”

“Thank you, Yeol. For everything,” he says, and he’s fully prepared but still toppled over when Chanyeol bearhugs him.

They’re putting down his certificates and paintings from the wall when there’s a knock on the open door. They both look, and Sehun is standing by the doorway, and it’s instant, the small ache for him in Minseok’s chest amplifying, and he almost drops the frame in his hands. He’s missed him so much.

“Ah,” Chanyeol says, eyes darting between them. He clears his throat, says, “I’ll go get you a coffee. Your last one here, for old time’s sake.”

“I, sure,” Minseok says, not really knowing what he’s saying, only looking at Sehun. He’s so, so beautiful. 

Chanyeol walks out, and because he’s Chanyeol, he gives Sehun a little side hug, surprising him from where he’d standing stock still, staring at Minseok, and he grins, before waving and leaving. 

It takes a minute, before Sehun somehow plucks the courage to break the silence, as he does, asks, “Can I come in?”

Minseok gives him a warm smile. “Of course.”

Sehun smiles back, and closes the door behind him. Walks up to Minseok, says, “Ah. Shit, I missed you. And not just your dick, I promise.”

Minseok rolls his eyes, but he expects it. Misses the way he’d always been so shameless, confident. “I missed you, too. So much, that I’ve been looking through all the pictures you’ve ever sent me of yourself. Even the ones with your ass in it.”

“You mean  _ especially  _ the ones with my ass in it,” Sehun says haughtily, “Cinematic masterpieces.”

“Sure, I’d love to see them on ten foot screens,” Minseok says, Sehun huffing a  _ “That’s fucking right.”  _ He chuckles, and seeing him now, seeing him look so tender and happy and light reminds him of how much he likes him. Loves him. 

Sehun waits for a moment before he says, “I heard from Baekhyun that you were going back to stay with your parents soon? For a few months?”

“Four months,” he says. Sehun’s smile dims slightly, and Minseok aches. “I leave the day after tomorrow.”

“Why didn’t you tell me?” he asks, and his tone is calm, understanding, but it doesn’t make it any easier to hear him ask. “You already told me you were going to do it. Why didn’t you tell me when?”

“Didn’t know how to tell you,” Minseok tells him honestly. And he’d wanted to tell him, really. Spent hours on end on his phone, thinking of how to word it, how to start, how to slip it into a conversation. Typed so many versions of it, and still, he couldn’t, because he didn’t know how to say it.

And, he thinks the answer still isn’t enough. He feels bad, wants to explain himself, but when he looks up to meet Sehun’s eyes, he knows. He can tell he understands. 

“What if I follow, and go with you?” 

Minseok feels his chest tighten. He wants, so much, but.

“As much as I want that,” he says slowly, trying to think of the words to say what he feels properly, “This is something I need to do on my own. I was in a relationship for so long, married for most of my twenties. I never figured out who I was as a person alone fully. You deserve to be more than a rebound. More than that, you deserve me whole.”

Sehun gives him a warm smile, his gaze staying tender as ever. “You deserve to be whole for yourself, Min.”

Minseok looks at him, and it aches, in a painful, good way. Thankful.

“The last few times. It’s wasn’t just about getting back at them, you know,” Sehun says, looking just at him, quiet, gentle. “I. I fell in love with you.”

Minseok’s heart stops, then races. “Sehun.”

“I know, I know,” he just smiles, but he doesn’t know. Minseok is in love with him,  _ so, so  _ in love, and he wants to say it back. But the timing, their timing is wrong.

“I love you too,” he says it anyway. Fuck timing. Some things, there are only a few chances for. “Hunnie. I  _ love you.” _

Sehun stares at him. His eyes are wet, and his lip trembles a little. 

“Minseok.”

“Come see me when you think I’m ready,” he says, and he tries not to sound too needy, too impatient, because as much as he loves him, he’s not ready. He hates it, a lot, hates himself a lot, because he wants to do this. Wants Sehun so much, and he loves him, but he wants to get better. Love can only fix so much if you’re not helping yourself with the rest.

Sehun stares at him, and he wants. Minseok sees it clearly on his face. He hopes he can wait, just a little more, for him. “How will I know when to find you?”

He tires to calm his heart quietly, feels like it’s beating right out of his chest, so happy, but a little cruel, knowing that he has to leave. So, he says with a great blush on his cheeks and grease trickling down his insides, “Trust. That the love I have for you, it will tell you when.”

Sehun sniffs, then makes a face. “That’s gross.”

“I guess you didn’t like it,” Minseok shrugs, smiling and rolling his eyes, at Sehun, and mostly at himself. 

“Please, it’s so lame,” Sehun scoffs. He doesn’t miss a beat when he tacks on, “I loved it.”

So Minseok pulls him in, and finds his lips with his own, and kisses him. Sehun already tastes like home to him, so familiar, always remembered with wonderful, steamy, gentle thoughts, all tender, all treasures.

Sehun licks into his mouth, comforting, and Minseok already misses him. It’s a little ridiculous. 

He cherishes the feeling.

.

.

It’s been slow. Painful, but good.

He has a therapist here, too. A psychiatrist too. He’s working on it, and getting better. 

Days are quiet, nights even more so, but it’s what he needs.

The days bleed into weeks, and the weeks bleed into a month, punctuated by almost daily calls with Junmyeon and Yixing, weekly calls with Jongdae, Baekhyun, Chanyeol, messages daily from Sehun. 

He misses everyone, but he feels like he’s doing well. The rest has been giving him more room to think, and at first, it had been hard. There are days he cried, nights where he cried too, and cried until he slept. There are days when he would stay in bed and just be so  _ tired,  _ so unmotivated. There are other days when he would not eat, and his parents had a hard time. 

But. The days wherein he would wake up, walk around and man the small bookstore his parents have had for decades, and where things are just  _ good,  _ are beginning to outnumber the bad days. He’s thankful, happy, and moving on.

Today, he had been planning to go to the park. Do some reading, and bring Tan along with him. 

But, his mother says as they’re having breakfast together, “Can you watch over the store today, darling? We told your sister we’d be visiting her today.”

He pouts, wanting to see her as well, but he knows they’ve got a delivery for a few new releases today and the store can’t be left unmanned, so he nods, “Please give her many hugs for me.”

“Of course,” she smiles, and she pats his cheek lovingly. 

It’s been comforting, being back home. Having the kind of meals he’d grown up with, and telling his mother what he’d been going through, letting her hold his hand as he cried, as he smiled when he told her of Sehun. Having Tan sleeping next to him, feeling his soft fur in the morning and lazing around with him. It had been good.

The delivery is a little late, and it throws Minseok off his schedule a little bit, but he manages to fix up a display for the window a few hours into opening for the day, and spends most of the rest of the morning arranging the titles. 

As things go, bookstores don’t see many customers in a day, but they are lucky to have a steady stream that seems to be constant. He gives recommendations for a few elderly clients, helps out a mother trying to acquire all the books in her son’s booklist for school, and sells the final copy of an official idol fanbook to a smiley girl, who asks him who his favorite member is, and he smiles in return, answering, “Mark.”

_ “Baby Mark,”  _ she beams, and he can see from her phone case that they had similar tastes. 

After lunch is a bit of a quiet hour, and he spends most of it sitting behind the counter, reading the next chapter of his manga. He likes these hours the most, truthfully, and the store is located in a nice, warm, glowy spot that has the light hitting just right despite the usual brightness of high noon, and sometimes, he just looks at the shop from his perch. Beautiful, warm, stories in every shelf and reading nook.

His heart is warm. Yearns a little. But he is content, and lets the sun wash over him. 

The bell over the door signals a new customer, and he smiles, standing to greet them. He almost falls on his face when he sees Sehun smiling at him, his hair dyed a beautiful auburn red, scarf hanging loosely around his neck, looking every bit the dream Minseok thinks he is.

“Hunnie?” Minseok says, approaching slowly, poking at his belly. Sehun raises an eyebrow, and Minseok explain, “Have to make sure I’m not dreaming.”

Sehun leans down, kisses him chastely, smile still on his lips. He tastes of Sehun, so  _ lovely,  _ and when he pulls away, Minseok blinks, a little dazed.

“I  _ am  _ dreaming,” he says, and Sehun snorts, rolls his eyes, but smiles still. 

“Hi, Minnie,” he says, and his voice,  _ fuck  _ Minseok has missed his voice. Gentle, sometimes naughty, but so, so Sehun. 

“Sehun,” he says, and there’s just  _ relief, warmth  _ in his chest, his belly, and it feels so easy, natural to smile, and be happy. 

“Are you ready now?” he asks Minseok, and Minseok blinks, not understanding. “You said, to come find you-”

“Oh,  _ oh,”  _ he says, and Minseok is embarrassed all over again. Truly  _ cannot  _ believe that that had come out of his mouth, so sweet and romantic and ridiculous and straight out of a manga. He feels like he  _ had  _ gotten it from something he’d read. 

He had meant it, of course. It’s still embarrassing, either way.

“I, I don’t know,” he answers, and Sehun stares at him, frowning.

“You said to find you when your love called to me!” he pouts, looking like a whole baby.

“I know, I know I did,” Minseok says, patting his cheeks, trying to get him to not be so pouty.

“Well, it’s calling to me,” Sehun says, and Minseok looks at him, so cute and he’s really so weak, for him.

He tilts his head down, stares at where his heart should be, and he hisses, “What the fuck are you doing, it’s only been a month.”

Sehun watches him try to reason with his heart, and Minseok can see from the corner of his eye that he’s smiling, looking so amused, and it makes him blush even more. 

“Well. You’ll never know until we try,” Sehun says, holding out his hand for him. Take a little break? I saw a cart selling red bean fish bread outside, I’m hungry from the trip.”

And, Minseok really can never say no to him. He locks up the shop with a sign saying he’ll be back in half an hour, may his parents forgive him, and he buys Sehun some of the fish bread, and egg bread too, and they sit on the front steps of the store, eating, thighs flush together, and Minseok has missed his heat. The warmth he always brought with him.

Minseok decides to be the one to break the silence, this time. Says, “We never did apologize to each other for using each other, did we?”

Sehun swallows a bite of egg bread, and takes a moment to think. “No, we didn’t.”

“Well, I’ll start,” Minseok says, and he looks at Sehun, feeling his cheeks pink, but pulling up every bit of advice he’d gotten from over a month of therapy and he says, “I’m sorry for fucking you multiple times to get back at my ex. I don’t regret the method of revenge, but. I wish I’d gotten to know you in a different way.”

Sehun doesn’t break the gaze, and the small smile on his face is so, so pretty. Minseok missed it, so much. “Well, I’m not sorry for being your little cockslut.”

Minseok snorts, and Sehun just grins. 

“But. I am sorry that I hit on you to make my dad mad, and that I used your situation to make even more tension,” he says, tone soft. “Really. I feel bad about it, now.”

“Don’t. I’m okay,” Minseok says, and he offers his hand out for him. Sehun looks at it, then at him, and he smiles. Takes it, links their fingers together. 

It’s quiet again for some time, as they eat their breads, drink their teas. Sehun asks him, a little later, “How is your life here?”

“It’s quiet,” Minseok tells him, looking out in front of them. There are hardly any people out at this hour, and there’s not much noise. He likes it. “My therapist says the change of pace would do me good. Being in that environment going too fast made things spiral quickly.”

“You look good. Healthy,” Sehun says, and Minseok’s chest lightens. He leans his head against Sehun’s shoulder, and it’s warm. Comforting.

“How about you?” Minseok asks him. “How are you?”

“I’ve calmed down a bit, I think,” Sehun tells him. “Jongin said it would be good, so, I’m seeing someone too.”

Minseok’s heart pauses. “Oh.”

“I mean a therapist,” he says, and Minseok sighs, pinching Sehun’s side, making him squirm a little. “Someone to talk to about everything that happened, and how I feel about it. We. We were really unhealthy with the way we approached everything.”

“Yeah,” Minseok smiles sadly, leaning back up when Sehun guides him to look at him. His lips are in a soft tilt upwards, and he looks. Calm, peaceful, liking where he is. And Minseok realizes that he’d been right, to come now, his heart warm and chest light and head clearer than it has been in a long time. 

“But we talked about it, and. The only thing I’m sure about is that when you smile, my chest goes all warm,” Sehun says. His eyes are bright, and his cheeks are pink. He looks very in love.

Minseok sniffs, feeling like he’ll cry. So, he hides it, making a face, saying, “Gross.”

“Listen,” Sehun says, looking smug and happy, “I’m young. Let me revel in my feelings. I still have license, old man.”

Minseok chuckles, and Sehun tucks his face into his neck, curling into him, the position familiar, his smell like home. Minseok feels especially at peace.

He’d been in pain, for so long. It feels too good to be true, finally here for him to live in and breathe and  _ be happy. _

It’s so, so warm, and he’s so happy. He says gently, not to disturb the bubble, “I don’t know if I deserve this. If I’m worthy of you.”

Sehun hums, and he holds Minseok’s hand tighter, quiet, understanding. “Well. I get to decide that, don’t I? I think you’re more than worthy.” 

He chuckles, nosing the front of Minseok’s collar with his nose, and. He’s here, and Minseok breathes him in. “We haven’t even really begun, but you’re worried about the end already.”

Minseok chuckles, eyes slightly wet. “Sorry.”

“I love you,” Sehun says, like a breath, easy, always been there. He’s always been sure. Minseok just needs to follow. “Please don’t be too worried. Let’s try, slowly. I’ll do it with you.”

Minseok meets his gaze, such a steady, sure thing. And, he breathes, and lets himself step in. “Okay. Thank you, I  _ love you.” _

Sehun smiles at him, and leans up to let their lips meet, and Minseok falls into him. 

.

They do it together, slowly, making mistakes sometimes, but sure, and happy. Time is kind to him, this time. 

****  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you so much.

**Author's Note:**

> thank you so much for reading. prompter, wherever you are, I hope you liked this. thank you for the inspiration.
> 
> me on [twitter](https://twitter.com/markxiuyeols)
> 
> me on [tumblr](http://www.castlenarry.tumblr.com)


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